Post # 1
I don’t know how else to describe it–“cold feet” maybe?
I’ve dated enough before meeting my Fiance to know that HE is the man I want to spend my life with…although our relationship is not perfect and we have some issues.
But when I think about getting married, I feel both excited and nervous.
Nervous that THIS IS IT. As in, FOREVER.
Yes, at the same time, FOREVER is also comforting. It is a mix.
Anyone else get jitters, cold feet, or nervous about it being FOREVER?
My tummy has butterflies just typing this post.
Post # 3
Before meeting my fiance I had dated, but had only had one serious boyfriend. Because of that I have always been so independent, relying on myself to do everything. There have been so many times that I’ve heard from family and my fiance that I’m too independent and need to let others help me. I’ve always just done what I want, and taken care of myself. With that being said, I have spent a lot of time getting over my “jitters” of getting married. I am so excited about being a wife to my future husband, but it has been a process. Hang in there! I understand!
Post # 4
Thanks, TennisChick! I think I’ve also been pretty independent, especially in relationships–like, emotionally independent. With everyone I’ve ever dated before my Fiance, I’ve been pretty neutral, liked or loved as a friend, but have never felt so strongly for someone or been able to *commit* before my Fiance. We’ve been together 2 years–and before this relationship, I’ve never dated anyone for more than a year. By The Way, I’m 30 years old; it’s not like i’m just out of college and have never dated! And now that the real commitment is staring me in the face, I think I’m realizing that it is unlike anything else I’ve ever faced, and I’m not entirely sure how to deal with it!
I’ve shared my nervousness and jittery feelings with my Fiance, and it doesn’t faze him. He’s kind of like, “I’m not nervous. But it doesn’t bother me that you’re nervous. I know we don’t have a perfect relationship, but nobody does, and whatever comes our way, we’ll work it out.” That does make me feel better.
Post # 5
I’m 27, so I am in the same boat! I felt like that for a while, but in the recent weeks I have gotten super excited about walking down the aisle! I’m sure you will be fine, and when your day gets here you will love it, along with the days that follow! 🙂
Post # 6
Every bride I have talked to has felt the same at some point or another including myself. Don’t let it get you too down. Your getting married!!!!
Post # 7
I definitely think those feelings are normal and supposed to be there. I get in modes of that all the time. It comes for me in waves – We are doing a 14 month engagement – I think at about 3 months or so, the forever concept started to freak me out. It went away maybe by month 6. It crops up now and again – and then I just remind myself that it’s ok to have butterfiles about this – it’s a HUGE thing, afterall!! I know that I’m going into this FOREVER – and FOREVER is scary yet wonderful all at the same time.
Since you know he is the person you want to spend the rest of your life – just enjoy the butterflies as part of the anticiaption of the huge commitment you are about to make.
If you are verbal processor – perhaps you can seek out a marriage/family counselor who can help you think through the feelings, etc.
p.s. I was talking to a married friend of mine recently… and she was saying that 30, 40 years with her hubby was not enough time… I thought it was such a beautiful way to look at ‘forever’ and made me so thankful I get Fiance FOREVER. 😉
Post # 8
I understand your jitters. I’m sorry that you’re experiencing them!
Right after I got engaged, I got the “jitters.” I felt very nervous about committing myself to one person for the rest of my life. I’m 34 and very independent – financially and otherwise. My fiance was very understanding when I shared my feelings with him.
I found a therapist who helped me through some of my anxiety and helped me to understand where those feelings were coming from and how to deal with them. I’m getting married in two months and I can’t wait to walk down the aisle and commit myself to the amazing man who will be my husband!
Good luck and feel free to PM me!
Post # 9
My best friend just got married. She said she was getting jitters but knew that the wedding was a good thing. We decided to term it “glitters” instead. it sounds more positive. She was more worried about the going ons and little details of the wedding rather than making the right choice with her now-husband. I think its normal. It’s a big change.
Post # 10
I have jitters every week! I love my Fiance but I get cold feet every time I seriously sit down to discuss the wedding with him. The word FOREVER scares me. I was the lst person to ever commit to anyone and now that I have said yes I’m spooked.