Post # 1
I know this site is for brides to be but I’m approaching my 10th wedding anniversary in September (2011) and found this site while I was researching ideas for a vow renewal. I used to think it was dumb to do but I have a lot of regrets with our wedding 9 years ago. While we didn’t have a lot of money, there were a lot of things I would have done differently, such as:
Get a nicer dress – I tried to save my parents money so I chose a Bridesmaid or Best Man dress in white for $150. It was fine but just not something I really loved.
Choose a better photographer – our pictures are horrendous. We look like the people from another century who look really short, even though we are average height or taller. The best picture from our wedding was one that a guest took, of our backs.
I know this sounds dumb but I really, really wanted our dog (my first baby) in the wedding and my mother-in-law was such a witch back then and I was so stressed out that I decided to do what she wanted.
We had a nautical themed wedding b/c I thought it would get my hubby more involved b/c he loves boats. I realized later that he could care less and was just happy getting married.
So…with all that (those were the main things, although there were other issues)…what I was planning on doing was just having hubby and I go to our original wedding site, get a new dress (nothing expensive but something I love and could never wear again…since I am getting older – will be 36 in February)…and hire a better photographer for a photo shoot, and include our dog! I originally thought I would do a private vow renewal with just us and that idea is not totally out of the picture but I’m not sure. Another issue we currently have is that we are on one income (hubby is a teacher and I’m a Stay-At-Home Mom…hoping to be back at work next fall after a 4 year hiatus to stay home with our son) so we definitely don’t want to do anything elaborate or have a party. I’ve given enough parties/bbq’s over the years and just don’t have it in me, especially since I have a 5 year old.
Just wanted to see if anyone would be willing to give me your thoughts if you have time. I know you all are planning a real wedding and I probably shouldn’t even be here but I just feel like I want to do something special for my 10th anniversary.
Thanks in advance for any help/suggestions.
Post # 3
@pinkstardustdesigns: I think you’re already off to a good start! You have a list of the things you weren’t too fond of at your wedding so now do the opposite, within reason.
No nautical theme and a good dress! There you go! My suggestion would be to keep it simple but include the elements you would like to have and build your program around there.
Any other ideas for what you’d like?
Post # 4
@pinkstardustdesigns: First of all, 36 is not old!
Second, “I know you all are planning a real wedding and I probably shouldn’t even be here but I just feel like I want to do something special for my 10th anniversary.” Don’t down play your vow renewal. Although it isn’t a wedding, it is an important celebration/event. By the way, congrat on the up coming 10th anniversary.
With that being said, do you have a budget for the anniversary? If you don’t want to do BBQ/party then have a bruch/dinner with your closest friends/family at a restaurant?
Post # 5
hey im getting ready to plan vow renewal too. we are just kinda peaking around at ideas so we can put some money away. we never took a honeymoon and have been through alot in the few years ie deployment ptsd medical him and me ect so.
a vow renewal is a wedding but with a twist we can do just about anything since we are already legally married so you dont have to worry about hirring a minister lol you could have someone who is special in you lives preside over you service.
we had a big church wedding so now we wanted to maybe do somthing at the beach simple a nice flowy dress and incorparate the important people in our lives my sister in law had her her hubby and kids all light candles to represent a new begining for them.
I think the private just the 2 of you thing is a good idea too. i know what you mean about being on here lol. feels kinda silly but i found it helping sister in law plan her wedding 🙂 the DIY boards and stuff are really helpfull. and i think being married for a while we can provide some insite and advice for those who are just starting out because alot of things can happen in ten years and i know the advice helped us 🙂
Post # 6
WARNING:—-LONG RESPONSE. Read at your extreme leisure!!
First of all…No no no no no. This site is completely for you too! Not just us new”bees”. As a matter of fact, I’d say 25 to 30% of brides here are saying they are going to do something small now and wait until later to do something else. You are planning a “real wedding” the same as we are! You go girl!
I have to tell you, I am closer to your age than I probably am to other bees (tee hee) and I planned a wedding around the same time as yours. But I am divorced and about to get married again! So kudos on the 10 years!
Here’s the thing, try not to get “sticker shock” with these vendors. Things have certainllllly changed since the turn of the century! Ha! I just hired a photographer that was asking for $1500United States Dollars!!!!! That was the going rate!! WTH? I paid $550 last time!!! I was bummed about it bc like you, photos are a priority on our wedding list and one of our major splurge items but DANG. But then I had an idea (I know, right??) After finding a few photographers we loooved on the internet, we emailed them a package we customized and thought was a FAIR price for us and them. Of course, some said no but I was pleasantly surprised at how many actually were willing to work for/with us at our price!!! So now we’re actually trying to decide on which one of these stellar photographers to use!!! Biggest tip I have ****DON’T BE AFRAID TO ASK/NEGOTIATE*****!!!!
Another thing, if you notice my wedding date, July 21, 2011 is a Thursday. Having it on a non-traditional wedding day gave us alot of weight when negotiating pricing!!!
Now I’m not sure what your budget is, but you said 1 income and 5 yr old so I’m thinking small. The other bees are right, the DIY section here and on the internet is amazing for ideas on a budget!! I would add to that that the biggest place to save is on the vendor, since your wedding is going to be small. Maybe a park or botanical garden. A cool museum would be an idea. Not sure where you live but is the beach an option? These places may have permits that you have to sign or small deposits you have to put down, but that’s about it. It’s not the millions of dollars it’ll cost for a ballroom or reception hall.
Even better, are you and hubby homeowners??!!!!! I just saw a back-yard ceremony that was MARVELOUS!!!! Chic and elegant. Intimate and amazing!! It completely re-defined backyard weddings for me!
Whew, I know that was alot but I loooved your story and wanted to share as much as I could with you. Good luck. I’m hoping to see more posts from you and am anxious to see how everything turns out!!!
Post # 7
I also am here for vow renewal advice. My husband and I are planning to renew our vows on June 15, 2011 for 15 years of marriage. I am 35 by the way.
I had a church wedding with all the hoopla 15 years ago and this time around my hubby and I are headed off to Cabo, Mexico to say “I do” on the beach. Nothing big, we have invited the best man (and his wife) from our original wedding and also a friend of mine(and her husband) that I met in nursing school and work with. Not sure either one will be able to come but the offer is out there.
In my vision (which changes alot but nonetheless) I see my husband and I on a beautiful part of the beach reading vows we wrote ourselves to eachother and a photographer taking pictures. Yes I have been looking online at Cabo photographers and can not believe the prices. Really $1600 for a small package you must be kidding right? Anyway, still working on that part as that just seems like highway robbery.
For the dress, I want something that makes me feel beautiful but not a traditional wedding gown, and my top priority after the vow renewal is the “trash” the dress. Meaning jumping into the ocean with dress on. I always love the trash the dress pictures other brides post.
I know I only have a little more time before I need to start putting everything together and booking a resort, photographer, and such but I love searching the boards here for destination wedding ideas.
This is the time your husband and you can do whatever you want. Mine is a more intimate approach for just us, but if I was having it back home where family is located involved I am sure it would be more of a big deal. I have always wanted to get married on the beach so here’s my chance.
Post # 8
I want a vow renewal for our 10th anniversary (2 years from now) and I want a big to do kinda. We originally got married in my hubby’s parents living room (we had 2 children from his first marriage we were raising and saving for a house) so we went super frugal. Now I want a dress, colors, centerpieces. I think it is a great thing to do and I agree, don’t downplay your renewal it is a great milestone.
Post # 9
my hubby and i are reaffirming our wedding vows in october to celebrate our 20th wedding anniversary, and we plan on doing it big. it’s your day, do what you want. we are having our ceremony and reception in the same room. us and our 3 children. no wedding gown but an evening gown. we will have hostesses to assist the guests. the minister that married us will be her this time,. not saying vows again, just saying how much we still love each other. we will do a unity sand ceremony with our girls. someone will sing. we will have a large reception with a sit down dinner, cake, candy buffet, the whole nine yards. we are not registering anywhere but if people wanna give us something to say congratulations on 20 years, then we will happily accept it. i even made a really nice card box. 🙂