Post # 1
Member
7 posts
Newbee
I dont know what to do … Someone please tell me if Im worried for no reason or what.
My Maid/Matron of Honor just found out she is pregnant. Her due date is 11 days before my wedding. I told her that I did not want her to feel obligated to be my Maid/Matron of Honor that I know she will be stressed and wore out. I do not want to add any extra stress to her at all ( she has had 3 previous miscarriages) She says she will be fine and wants to be Maid/Matron of Honor.
Im really concerned. If she delivers around her due date, ( i know all pregnancies are different) I wouldn’t imagine that she is going to want to be in a wedding and all that stuff will having a 2 week old baby.
What do I do…..??? Please help
Post # 3
Member
1344 posts
Bumble bee
If you’re worried for your friend, I wouldn’t be. She’ll let you know if it’s too much for her.
If you’re worried that you’ll be down a Maid/Matron of Honor, maybe you could designate two MOH’s a bit later on? Then if she does pull out, you’ll still have a Maid/Matron of Honor without them feeling like a ‘back up’.
Post # 4
Member
7 posts
Newbee
Im not worried about being down a Maid/Matron of Honor.. I dont have a back up either. My concern is with her having 3 miscarriages . My Maid/Matron of Honor stresses about everything. Shes a very emotional gal lol. We arent having a big wedding wedding party, actually her and the best man are the only ones in the bridal party. Its a very laid back country wedding so if she can’t do it, Im ok with it. but if i do need to get a back up, they all live out of state so I would need time.
I know how she worries though and I dont want her thinking she has to be Maid/Matron of Honor . I know there was a few weeks after I had my son when I sure didnt feel like dressing up. I def would not want to be in pics or attend a wedding.
Post # 5
Member
317 posts
Helper bee
@ledgersmom: This is my worst dream come true. I’m so sorry that the timing of your wedding and your MOH’s due date are SO close! The good news is that your Maid/Matron of Honor will be able to take part in all of the events leading up to your wedding. Best case scenario is that if her pregnancy and delivery go well and she delivers before your wedding then she will likely be able to at least stand in your ceremony and be at the reception long enough to give a toast. Most women who give birth vaginally with no complications are able to get up and walk around within a couple of days so while she may not be able to dance the night away, she should be able to stand with you for the ceremony. Worst case scenario she ends up giving birth the day of your wedding or 2-3 days before. A due date is a rough estimate. Usually there is a window within which women can give birth (either 2 weeks before or 2 weeks after the due date).
Post # 6
Member
317 posts
Helper bee
@ledgersmom: Helping you with your wedding might acutally be a great escape for her if she has had several miscarriages and is worried about this pregnancy.
Post # 7
Member
9050 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
I would predict that she’s not likely to make it to the wedding. I’d leave her Maid/Matron of Honor for the honour, and just be one person short if she doesn’t make it. No need to promote a backup or anything. Her responsibilities on the day are fairly minimal, especially if you have other bridesmaids.
Post # 8
Member
1344 posts
Bumble bee
@ledgersmom:
In that case I think it should be ok. I imagine that she’ll be pretty careful not to stress herself out, and i’d just keep her responsibilities to a minimum until after the first trimester (once the risk of miscarriage has gone down). As Artdecolisa said, this could be a good escape for her. You sound like a good friend 🙂