- 8 years ago
Need help bees:
Most of you know my Future Mother-In-Law and Future Sister-In-Law issues. Well we are 11 days from the big day! Fiance and I are super excited!
In the last month and half we have had NO contact with his mother and sister. He changed companies and cell numbers and only gave them our house line to call and told them that until they can accept and come to terms with him and I, and stop hating on me for everything that they will no longer be in our life. So ties were cut. This all came after his mother sent in the RSVP card no and had lengthily conversations with us and my family that she was not attending. At this point in time we had to have our playlist to our band so that they could practice the songs we wanted played. Fiance felt that with the circumstances with his mother that he wasn’t going to be doing a dance. He had asked her months prior, things were still pretty bad with her but not to the point that they are now, and her response to him was I don’t care, I can’t even think about dancing with you. Umm okay, fine, we submitted the list with no dance with his mother and him. We also will not be including her in the ceremony entrance walk or unity candle ( his father will be doing it with my mother) because she said she will come and stand in the back of the church. We weren’t stopping our plans and chasing after his mom to be a part of this day with us. So fast forward to last week. His mother some how ( probably from his cousin) got his company cell phone. She called it a few times and left snarky messages to him. He did not return her phone calls. He never once gave her his company number, nor is he allowed to use his company phone for personal calls AND he gave her OUR house line for a reason, if she wants to talk to him she can do so and call OUR house. She has done none of this. He was worried that she was going to keep calling his company cell phone so he briefly emailed her yesterday telling her that she was never given the work number and she can not call that number, that she needs to call the house if she wants to talk to him. This started a fight with her, which we knew it would. She came back at him calling him a liar, me a liar, yet again attacking my family and me, pretty much hashing up all the things she has been. My Fiance answered her once with a pretty firm email, telling him that he will not answer her calls or her emails or acknowledge her, he said the hurt that she has put everyone through the entire engagement is unjust and her issues need to be worked out with herself not ON US and on MY family. She then wrote back a very nasty email, calling him names, telling him that he has taken all her happiness away and that this day ( our wedding day is HER day) and that she will not let US ruin this day another memory for her! Are you kidding! UGH!
So today, she sends my Fiance another email with the heading Wedding Song. And she says. “I have chosen the song I would like to dance with you to. The Breath You Take, by George Strait”
She then sends me an email. I had sent out a massive group email a month and half ago to family and friends detailing the events of the day and timeframes and such, she was included on it as well as his sister. In my opinion, that was her chance to attempt to try to be apart of the day and step in but she didn’t. She never acknowledge me or the email. However, today, she replies to that very email and says. “Thanks for the info, hope all is well, let me know if you need anything” Love always
What the hell do we do! We feel that a week before our wedding we need to be making accommodations for her, there is no way we can have the band do the song she wants to play and frankly he doesn’t even want to dance with her. We feel that this is her way of trying to come and say oh it’s all them, look what they have done to us. But I just feel like 7months of pure BS and hell with them, that I’m not now going to go and make this day about her. I’m sorry she is the one who CHOSE not be a part of this time with us and now she wants to “pretend” to be nice.
UGH! Help, what do I do?