(Closed) :( Please help an incognito married bee. DH and alcohol…kinda long..

posted 7 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
767 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

Without hearing what the update will be from him, I would say that Darling Husband has a pattern of behaviour that is slightly uneasing for me.

“Of course, he didn’t answer his phone or call me until the next morning when I was still trying to get a hold of him, because I’m sure he knew he was doing something of which I would disapprove.”

Married (or engaged) men shouldn’t have to stay out all night and IGNORE the calls of their loved ones.  What if something had happened to you and you HAD to get ahold of him?  Partners are supposed to be stable and be there for you….I think you need a serious talk with Darling Husband and he needs to possibly get some kind of help for his drinking…

Hugs….

Post # 4
Member
1763 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

I am so sorry you were left to worry all night. When you return home I think you need to have a major talk withyour Darling Husband about his drinking habbits and how genuinely concerned you are for him. Hopefully it was an innnocent dead cell phone, make sure to update us!

Post # 5
Member
2539 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: March 2012

i wouldnt say he has a drinking problem but i do think you guys need to talk about him having limits….

waiting for an update…hope all is well!

Post # 6
Member
671 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

I hope it all turns out okay.

Post # 7
Member
3142 posts
Sugar bee

I’ve gone through this with my Fiance too.  He doesn’t do it often but once in a while he gets completely plastered and any reasoning goes out the window.

He did it one last time to me and something happened that was the straw that broke the camel’s back.

This was enough to scare him he has not slipped up once since.  We also laid new ground rules.

But I remember how scared/angry/confused I was when he did this.

It’s like they become a different person for that one night.

I really hope that your husband is fine.

If he did “slip up”, I recommend a couple of emergency couselling sessions so you guys can have professional help establishing “boundaries” within your relationship for this kind of activy.  Having a neutral/professional there really helped us and kept the whole thing … more on track that it would be had we just done it on our own.

Good luck to you!!

Post # 8
Member
5886 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: October 2010

Being an alcoholic doesn’t mean you drink all the time. It means, when you do drink, you can’t control yourself and their are bad consequences. Making you upset is a bad consequence. Please do some reading on alcoholism, learn about al-non and let him know that this behavior is not acceptable.

Good Luck

Post # 12
Member
767 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

@mauranomore: I’m so thankful it was only him falling asleep!!!!!

Post # 14
Member
7431 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2009

PMed you

Post # 15
Member
3142 posts
Sugar bee

@mauranomore:

It’s crazy isn’t it?  I mean, honestly its like they turn into a different person.

And because its such a rare occurence, you are always thrown for such a loop.

 

 

Post # 16
Member
5921 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: December 2010

@mauranomore: I don’t have any advice, but just wanted to let you know I’m thinking of you!

The topic ‘:( Please help an incognito married bee. DH and alcohol…kinda long..’ is closed to new replies.

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