(Closed) Please Help–Can just sense a dilemma on the horizon

posted 7 years ago in Relationships
Post # 3
Member
1527 posts
Bumble bee

Haha there are a number of threads about this. My favorite reaction to “Yeah, we’re getting married,” “No you’re not.” *disbelieving look* 

Just ignore their reactions. There are a lot of early 20-year-olds who are really mature and at that stage where we are ready to “settle down” (although my fiancé and I really don’t consider it settling). There are also a lot of people in their 30’s who don’t want marriage or aren’t ready for it. 

Just ignore their negativity and focus on the positives, like your soon-to-be fiancé ๐Ÿ™‚

Post # 4
Member
1735 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

@caseybop1: I know how you feel, although from a different situation. I had my daughter when I was 22, and it made me feel like I lived on a different planet from the rest of my friends. I felt more mature, more responsible, and more capable than they seemed to be. And I got a lot of, “Uh, are you crazy, you can”t be a mom now!” when I first told them I was pregnant. And I just said, “Well, yeah, I can.” Not that my daughter was planned, but as soon as I knew I was preggers I realized I had to step up and change my life so I could be a good parent. And it just felt like my friends were years behind me maturity-wise.

The cool thing was, my friends eventually came around and got excited – especially when they got to go shopping for baby things, ha.

So, if your friends have a negative reaction to your engagement, just remember that both you and your SO know that you’re ready for this and can make it work. And hopefully, once your friends see how well you two are doing, they’ll come around and realize that an early engagement wasn’t a mistake. ๐Ÿ™‚

Post # 5
Member
7431 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2009

Hubs and I got together when I was 20, engaged at 23, married at 25. We were the first in our group to get married, and we heard it all. But you know, until they have the same thing, they will never understand. So just laugh it off and continue on with your life, and come here to vent about it of course ๐Ÿ™‚

Post # 6
Member
88 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

I’m 24 and had similar comments, not from friends but from my sisters.  Yeah it sucks that they’re negative on the subject but at the end of the day you know what you two have and that’s all that really matters.  Eventually they’ll be on board and if not, they aren’t really your friends ๐Ÿ™‚  Good luck and keep us posted!

Post # 8
Member
2584 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

I got engaged a few weeks before I turned 20, and I’ll be 21 when we get married. I guess I honestly don’t care what other people think, I know we’re ready and so does my Fiance. Some people think we’re crazy, but a lot of people are really supportive. For the few people who say anything rude and don’t keep it to themselves, we just make it clear we aren’t going to sit around and listen to insults, and they either stop or we don’t hang out with them anymore. I think confidence is key- if you don’t let it get to you, people will take you seriously and won’t say anything.

I’m in college too by the way, technically a junior but I skipped a year for financial reasons so I still have two to go. We’re getting married before I graduate. When you do get engaged make sure to share the story and ring pics! ๐Ÿ™‚

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