- 9 years ago
I know it’s early but my Boyfriend or Best Friend and I have been discussing the future and the location of our wedding so that we can begin to budget and save accordingly. I was wondering if some people are in the same situation and if so, whether you would be able to weigh in with your ideas.
My Boyfriend or Best Friend lives abroad in Guyana and so do most of the people he would want to be there… I live in NY. My family is spread out, most of them live within the NY metro area or along the east coast, as far as Florida.
Initially, I thought it would be best to get married abroad to reduce our costs; however, as we get more serious in our discussions, I know it would be very difficult for a lot of my family and friends to travel. I want to accomodate my BF’s family but I also know that if I agree to have one wedding abroad, I would feel like I’d “missed out” on sharing the experience with a lot of the people I love here in the states.
Here are some more details:
1) Neither of our families will be able to help us financially… I don’t expect them to at all, but I’m putting it out there so it’s clear a familial contribution doesn’t tip the scale either way.
2) We are both West Indian but from different countries. My family is Trini.
3) He is Christian and my family is Hindu (although I do not practice the faith). I would like to incorporate elements of both faiths into my wedding. The food is pretty much the same.
4) I come from a large family, as does my Boyfriend or Best Friend. We are both the oldest children.
5) I’m a doctor and the first professional in my family so there is an expectation that I have a “nice” wedding that family will be able to attend. I’d also be expected to invite some colleagues and classmates. It shouldn’t matter but it’s important to my mom who has done a lot for me. It’s also somewhat important to me.
I am ok with a reception at home, like a month after the wedding… but in this event, should I invite all of the same people to the wedding? If I do this, when do I send out that invitation for the party here? How “reception-ey” do I make the party in terms of program? Do I have to serve real food or could you just do it as a party? Will my Boyfriend or Best Friend be uncomf if his family isn’t here?
My Boyfriend or Best Friend proposed having a Christian ceremony abroad, followed by a more casual reception and a Hindu ceremony here, with a reception afterwards… but I’m wondering whether we would be able to do that cost-wise without compromising event style.
Help! Any thoughts would be appreciated.