Post # 1
I have a major dilemma and have no idea what to do. I lost my two closest friend 6 months before i got engaged. We were friends for 6 years and they were both going to be bridesmaids in my wedding. A stupid fight broke all three of us apart, and one of them have been arrested several times since then. I dont have very many other friends since we were so close and hung out with no one but each other.
My maid of honor lives 6 hours away. Shes in school and won’t be able to participate in hardly any activitres such as showers and parties. she’ll only be here the day of the wedding, since she’ll be traveling to my place the day before.
I asked one of my friends to be a bridesmaid and she said she doesnt know because of school and she doesnt think she could afford it anyway. I highly doubt she’ll end up saying she will be a bridesmaid.
I have another friend that i’m not real close too, but we talk occasionally and get together sometimes. We dont know to-to much about each other, just the basics. I was thinking about asking her to be a bridesmaid, thinking maybe we’ll get closer over the next 11 months.
I really really really don’t want to be standing alone up there with no girls. My maid of honor will be there, but not for any other festivites. i want at least one bridesmaid but just dont know what to do. what do you think??
Post # 3
@futuremrsbc: Honestly, I think you’re better off without a bridesmaid. If there’s any advice I have for a bride, it’s NOT to have a bridal party. I honestly wish thzt I never had one. Most of them did absolutely nothing to help with the wedding and only caused more problems; agreeing on a dress and then wanting me to change their dresses less than five months before the wedding, complaining about the color, etc. Not to mention all the problems I had with the girl who was originally supposed to be my maid of honor but then was so jealous and catty and downright nasty until I just couldn’t take it anymore and had to replace her. I also had a bridesmaid, a groomsman, and a ringbearer (my brother-in-law, his wife, and my nephew) drop out of the bridal party a month before the wedding because they couldn’t make it. If I had to do it all over again, I honestly would not have had any bridesmaids or a maid of honor because they’re nothing but trouble. If you don’t have any bridesmaids, then I say count your blessings!
Post # 4
How would the processional work without a bridal party? I’m worried it would look awkward. I’m fine with the idea, just dont know what everyone would think
Post # 5
I would stick with the Maid of Honor who you know will be there for you. I think asking people you are not that close to, will only create more problems.
There is nothing wrong with having one attendant.
Post # 6
@futuremrsbc: You can just have the bride walking up the aisle with her father (or whoever else she chooses, if anyone at all). I’ve seen a procession where the groom walked halfway back down the aisle to meet the bride (who was walking alone) as she was coming up and the symbolism in that is really beautiful.
Bridal parties look nice but they’re not actually necessary. All that’s really needed is two legal witnesses.
Post # 7
I’ve been to a few weddings with just a maid of honor and a best man with no one else. In both, the officiant, groom, and best man were already standing at the altar and then the maid of honor walked down the aisle, then the bride and her dad walked down the aisle. It didn’t seem weird or awkward, and I’m sure it’s much less of a hassle to have one attendant.
Post # 8
@futuremrsbc: I understand your concerns about feeling alone if you only have a maid of honor and no bridesmaids, but I wouldn’t necessarily ask someone to be a bridesmaid just so you can have someone else standing on your side.
I honestly don’t think it matters whether or not your maid of honor lives in town. Yes, it does kind of suck that she won’t be around to throw you a bridal shower or bachelorette party, but those things aren’t necessary.
It sounds as though your other friend in school is concerned about the expense, and unless you’re willing to pay for her dress, shoes, hair, makeup, travel expenses, etc., you shouldn’t press the issue with her. I’m sure she’d like to be there for you, but it really is difficult to commit to something like that when you’re just not sure you have the money (or possibly also the time).
I also wouldn’t ask someone I’m not that close to to be in the wedding party in the hopes that we’d get closer over the next year or so. Honestly, if someone I just occasionally hung out with asked me to be a bridesmaid in her wedding, I’d think it was a little weird. I’d be happy to attend as a guest, but I wouldn’t feel right standing in front of all of her friends and family on one of the most important days of her life if I really didn’t even know her that well.
For the record, everyone in my wedding party (I’m having two bridesmaids and my best friend will be my man of honor) lives elsewhere. I’m not doing any sort of parties or showers prior to the wedding. They’ll most likely all stay for at least 2 or 3 days so we can spend some time together, but that’s it. Sometimes I wish we had time to do some fun stuff together before the wedding, but it’s most important to me that they’re here for the actual ceremony/reception. These are the people I’m closest to (besides my mom and fiance!), and that’s why they were chosen to be in my bridal party.
Sorry for the super long response … I just don’t want you to feel like you have to have a bunch of people standing with you. A lot of people don’t have a lot of bridesmaids, and I’m sure they still have great memories of their wedding!
Post # 9
If you have other family to help celebrate your shower and parties then I would say to you go without any bridesmaids. I’m having only one bridesmaid who is my longterm friend and my sister as Maid/Matron of Honor. I genuinely feel happy to have very few people up there with me, only the people that matter to me. Years from now I want to look back on my wedding photos and know the same people are still in my life now.
Post # 10
You don’t need bridesmaids. I chose not to have a bridal party, and didn’t miss it. Often, they are way more drama than they are worth (these boards definitely show that!)