(Closed) Please help! So desperate!

posted 6 years ago in Babies
Post # 3
Member
988 posts
Busy bee

My LO isn’t born yet, so I won’t offer much in way of advice.  But I do think that if your son was sleeping better when swaddled, then by all means go back to swaddling.  If you want to transition away from swaddling, maybe you can introduce a second sleep cue.  I know my friend who is a mom of 3 swears by soothing music as a nighttime routine for her girls.  Maybe you could swaddle and use music as a bed time routine and then gradually transition the swaddling out and just keep the music?

Post # 4
Member
306 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

Just a suggestion: Try putting him to bed later. 930/10:00. I also agree with

@chastenet:   about the soothing music. 

Post # 6
Member
664 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: December 2011

I haven’t had my little one yet, but my heart goes out to you. I’m already not sleeping that well at night and I can’t imagine how tired I’m going to be once the baby is here and gets up several times during the night.

Maybe go back to the full swaddling and see if that helps? If his movements are waking him up I would think the swaddling would help prevent some of that. Other than you wanting to transition him out of swaddling, there isn’t a reason he can’t be swaddled at night, right?

Post # 7
Member
870 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: February 2011

I’m not going to claim to be an expert since my son slept through the night from day one, but I have watched a lot of kids and talked to a lot of moms so I may have a few idea’s for you.

    1. Get a recorder and record the sound of the hair dryer and just have it play all night to see if that helps since he likes it so much. You don’t have to stay there to make sure the house doesn’t burn down and he gets the help he needs. If you don’t want him used to the dryer all the time you could try playing classical music in the background and then slowly lower the sound of the hair dryer until he just hears the music and falls asleep to that instead.
    2. Put him in his car seat and set him on the dryer while it’s running. (ETA: Stay in a chair close by and keep an eye on him then when he falls asleep take him off but keep him in the carseat so he doesn’t wake up) The motion from it is supposed to help them feel relaxed and safe and helps them sleep so long as you have a smooth running dryer. (This worked for my nephew and he had a major case of colic)
    3. My SIL’s girls can’t sleep without the fan on because their mom had one one all night every night while pregnant and while she shared a room with them so now if the fan isn’t on they won’t sleep. Maybe there is something you did all the time that would comfort him if you started doing it again. Maybe you listen to a certain type of music or kept your tv on for some background sound. The smallest thing can have a big impact on an infant.
    4. Put a tiny bit of cereal in his bottle. I know you said he doesn’t like it but I wasn’t sure if you were trying to feed it to him or do it this way. Putting just enough in his bottle to help fill him but not enough so it gets clogged and doesn’t come out usually helps them feel full longer.
    5. Swaddle him again. If that used to help him sleep there is no reason you should stop. Until it gets to the point where he is finding a way out of it then it usually helps. Some parents swaddle their children for a good 6 months or so.

    I’ll try to think of more but for now maybe one of these will help.

    Post # 8
    Member
    6823 posts
    Busy Beekeeper
    • Wedding: June 2011

     

    @bride21:  I disagree with putting a baby on top of a dryer in a car seat.  This can be dangersous, you are not supposed to leave a baby in a carseat unattended when said carseat is on top of things. 

    OP I feel for you I have a 6 month old and he still does not sleep through the night, he was a premie so technically he is about your LO age. 

    Have you tried setting a routine?  My muchkin is now in the stage of not wanting to go to bed and screams and crys… we have just started a routine now, about a half an hour before I put him to bed we go into our room and lay there and read books and generally wind down. 

    He still gets up in the middle of the night for feeding and he is also in the middle of teething..

    It also seems like you did quite a bit for transition for him that maybe overwhelming him.  Moving to a crib and no swaddling could be a lot and overwhelming to him. 

    You might want to scale back to one thing for a while so he gets used to it and then try the next thing.  That is how we stopped swaddling our little guy. We swaddled until about a month and half ago.  He now sleeps in a sleep sack with arms out.  How we did it was we started to put one arm out for a while then moved to sleep sack but with arms in the sleep sack. He still had movement but his arms were not flying all around and waking himself up.  Then we put one arm out and one arm in the sleep sack until finally he was able to have both arms out…

    Post # 9
    Member
    870 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: February 2011

    @Sassygrn:  I didn’t say to leave him alone there. You stay and watch him but it’s the only thing that worked for my nephew. After he fell asleep they would take him off of it but keep him in his carseat so as not to wake him up. I wouldn’t tell someone to put their child on the dryer and WALK AWAY. That’s neglect and child endangerment if something happens. I’m a soon-to-be mother of 2, I’m not stupid.

    Post # 10
    Member
    6009 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: May 2009

    If you’re looking to get away from swaddling but he still has a strong Moro reflex, you could try something like a sleep sack or a sleep suit.  This one, in particular, is supposed to mimic the feeling of being swaddled, but it’s just a sleep suit.

    Other thoughts:  You can try give him sleep cues or a sleep routine, like others have suggested.  It will take a little while to get the full effect, but creating a sleep routine for him should help him get to sleep and stay asleep.  

    Secondly, it sounds like he’s waking up after only one sleep cycle at night (45 minutes).  Different techniques work for different babies, but the most successful one I’ve seen is to go into his room right before the sleep cycle ends (say at 40 minutes) and soothe him back to sleep in his crib at the first sign of waking.  Some babies go back down with just patting/rubbing, others respond to singing or soft talking, or you could try running the hair dryer again.  It might take a night or two to figure out what works for him, but eventually the effect should be that he learns to sleep for multiple cycles in a row, extending the period between waking.

    Finally, we never did CIO out either, and I referenced this book quite a bit to learn gentle methods of sleep training.  If you don’t want to use CIO, I really recommend this book; it helped us a lot.

    Post # 11
    Member
    6823 posts
    Busy Beekeeper
    • Wedding: June 2011

    @bride21:  I never said you were stupid, just some people would put said car seat with child on top of something and walk away… I apologize if you felt I called you that.

    Post # 12
    Member
    870 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: February 2011

    @Sassygrn:  Maybe it’s the hormones that got me upset but it’s just hard for me to believe that there are people out there that actually do things like that. I tend to stay away from the news and everything involved because of all the cases where a child has died because of something stupid like that and it just didn’t occure to me that someone reading it might not realize that they are suppose to stay with their child the whole time if they do #2 on my list.

    Post # 13
    Member
    828 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: January 2011

    My DS is 4 months old next week, too 🙂 We have had a few nights this past week where he wakes up at 1:30, 4:30 and finally 5:45am… I feel like it’s a growth spurt because I bottle and breastfeed him before putting him to bed at 9:30/10 and he still wakes up. 

    Usually we do this: Around 9/9:30 make him a bottle, set it down while I change his diaper and dress him for bed. I also put baby lotion on him in a mini-massage before dressing him. We read a book together and then I give him his bottle. After the bottle, I turn off the lights and nurse him a bit. Sometimes I don’t even have to because he starts to fall asleep while I give him the bottle. If he’s still awake, I’ll nurse him. He usually falls asleep at 9:30/10. The nights where he doesn’t fall asleep I place him in his bassinet. (Ugh, yes, he’s still in the bassinet! haha) He usually plays in there until he does finally sleep. 

    I feel like the lotion-book-bottle tells him it’s bed time and they are three things that I can do for him anywhere we go. Hotel, my mom’s house, etc. 

     

    Maybe the transition to crib and transition to sleeping without the swaddle was too much too soon. Like if you tried no swaddle in the bassinet for a few nights and then tried no swaddle in the crib it might work?

    Post # 14
    Member
    828 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: January 2011

    UPDATE – I tried the crib last night for the first time and he totally slept from 9:45pm to 6am and if I didn’t pick him up then to feed him before I went to work, he would’ve stayed asleep there! 

    It was a long, drawn-out transition from bassinet to crib for us, but it was a success last night. 🙂 good luck

    Post # 15
    Member
    245 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: June 2009

    Good luck! I also would say try doing a bedtime routine now. It’ll become ingrained soon enough, and that might help. WHite noise, a swaddle, and also when your baby is older a lovey may help.

    Post # 16
    Member
    1883 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: June 2010

    Can you wake him up around 10:30-11PM to feed him? Up until Dirty Delete was ( I think) 6 months old (she is 1 now) her “bedtime” was 11PM. People thought I was nuts, but when I would try to put her to sleep for the night at 8PM it was a struggle to get her to STTN because she would wake up around 1AM  and want to nurse and then it was all downhill.  She did go down at 8AM (and so would I) but I would set my alarm and wake her to feed her. 

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