(Closed) Please help! Trying to decide to elope or continue with venue issues…

posted 3 years ago in Elopement
Post # 2
Member
47436 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

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roguesoul :  Does your Fiance feel the same way? There are always other options.

For 35 people, you could find a restaurant with a private room and have the ceremony and dinner in the same room. Very little decor required, usually way better food, no focus on special dances, just good friends and good food.

Open Table provides lists of restaurants with private dining rooms for most major cities.

Post # 4
Member
663 posts
Busy bee

I am a bride that is eloping to Maui just us two. It is not a stressful or expensive process. I dont see the point in spending loads of money to be stressed thus this is my choice. We are really excited and it will be just about us. Everyone I tell this to says “I wish I would have just eloped like you are, etc.”

Post # 5
Member
1724 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2016

We decided a destination elopement made the most sense for us, and family and friends chose to celebrate with us before we left.  

I did the math, and a week in Jamaica at an all-inclusive resort plus the wedding and flight was about 5K.  We’d barely be able to have 30 guests for a few hours locally for that price here, and H’s family is not very mobile and live just far enough away that the logistics were bad.

The resort had some venues ready to choose from, cakes, champagne toasts, photographers, and a minister.  All we really had to do was pick what color flowers, pay a $250 deposit and the room before we arrived and then show up.

I’m glad we did it that way – and elopement does not mean you sneak off in the dead of night these days – it just means a very small, intimate wedding, with either just the couple and a few witnesses or a very, very small group of attendees.

It is YOUR wedding.  And if your mom and your Fiance have no preconceived notions, do away with frills you don’t want or need.  Have as many or as few as you can afford attend, and do it however you want.  All that is really important is that you are both married at the end of the day and are happy.

Post # 7
Member
241 posts
Helper bee

We are running away just the two of us to get married this summer and a few weeks afterward we are having a backyard party to celebrate with people. I’m stressing about the party, but at least I know that it won’t be a recreation, there won’t be any typical reception things (garter/toss/cake-cut/toasts). So I feel better about it just being a party.

You do you and at the end of the day you will be happy.

Post # 8
Member
45 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: April 2018 - Family Ranch

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roguesoul :  honestly sounds like you would enjoy the eloping/very small destination wedding! You can always have a BBQ/party once back and celebrate with the original group of people and have it be super casual. 

Post # 9
Member
1569 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: March 2017

Girl, no. It doesn’t sound like you want to have a wedding at all. I do think that your wanting it to feel special means you should do something special, but it doesn’t need to be a 5 digit party for people you don’t even care about coming. There are many resorts that offer elopment packages, and you can have a romantic vacation at the same time. If it’s important to you to have family there, PP’s suggestion of a smaller restaurant party is great. Do what is right for the two of you, but don’t do it because you feel you are “supposed to”. 

Post # 10
Member
3237 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: March 2017

Our elopement was about $3500 (after airfare). I will tell you not to take the decision lightly. You can only do it once so do whatever is in your heart. I don’t regret eloping but a big wedding wasn’t something I was willing to take on.

Post # 11
Member
1724 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2016

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roguesoul :  this is me shamelessly sharing photos 🙂

https://www.facebook.com/media/set/?set=a.10153466094402130&type=1&l=d3cabe46aa

We met the coordinator the day after we arrived, she made sure she had our cake and flower preferences right, got my appointment in the salon for hair and makeup set for the right time for me to be ready, and told us how to handle me getting into my dress without H seeing me before the ceremony.  Then she gave him his boutonniere, set up the music we’d picked out, and then came to get me for the before photos and to get started.  I was so happy, it was fast, simple, and so pretty 🙂

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