Post # 1

Member
220 posts
Helper bee
Hi bees,
So to start off I must say that I am happy and excited to become a husband and a wife with my beloved fiancee.
We have ordered a dress, which I adore. We had all these wonderful plans how bright and happy our wedding will be.
We booked a pretty little venue, full of flowers, trees, little artificial spring, little bridge. All surrounded by forests and mountains. Beautiful inside and outside. We are having a small wedding with just our parents and some friends…We had these plans about moss aisle runner, huge round baloons, lime green and cobalt blue and burlap decor…We booked the most expensive and talented videographers….But…
I don’t want the wedding. Thinking of 30 pairs of eyes staring at me at such intimate moment of getting married just makes me sick at my stomach. Imagining our parents and grandparents cry out of happiness makes me vomit…My mom still thinks we are kids and talkes to us in funny voice sometimes…One of my best guy friends who is invited once expressed his feelings about our relationship that he thinks it is weird that couples engage 9 month after meeting each other and start living together 2 months after metting each other…He said such couples soon find that they are very different and break up…It is so not true. I hate it…I don’t wanna be seen by all those people on my wedding day…
I always wanted to have a beautiful wedding…All my life…And now I am backing up. Can it be that I just simply don’t like the venue…Or simply do not like the way the wedding is going to happen…I don’t know…
I didn’t even start making invitations…I am afraid that people who receive them will think something bad about us…Like that we are not that close for them to come or “Who do they think they are inviting ME to their wedding”….I am just so down…
Sorry that it all sounded so mixed up, my feelings just overwhelm me…
The venue that is booked does not give back depostis…Same are videographers…
Post # 4

Member
3943 posts
Honey bee
I kind of understand what you mean. But it sounds like you are inviting family and just very close friends. So why would they think bad about you?
If you and your future husband dont want a wedding, theres nothing wrong with that. What about eloping?
Post # 5

Member
220 posts
Helper bee
Well, the friends are just friends…Not so close. Some of them seem to be not mature enough to understand that the wedding is “FOR REALS DUDE”…
We thought about eloping…Still I want to have nice memories about the wedding, I wanna wear my darling wedding dress, to have everything videofilmed. Maybe it happened because I am having so much pressure from my relatives becase when my cousin got married 5 years ago, they had a big wedding, with lots of delicious food. And all we got at our venue is potatoes, roast beef and turkey and some veggies….her wedding was videotaped. And the “MOST IMPORTANT THING” – she was 19 when got married…And I am already 20…So I am never gonna catch up lol, and she will always be “the pride” of the family…
I might have been carried away by all those issues…and wanted a nicer wedding…to prove that I am good too…
Post # 6

Member
227 posts
Helper bee
Your wedding shouldn’t be about proving anything- it’s about committing yourselves to each other, and celebrating that. Everyone is different, and every wedding is different. What matters is that YOU enjoy it. Your food sounds good too, btw. People like “comfort” food!
I don’t mean to be mean, but it seems odd to me that someone would be the “pride” of the family just because they got married young. What’s the reasoning behind that? It should be more important that you’re in love, not how old you are!
Post # 8

Member
843 posts
Busy bee
It seems to me that you are the one placing all the doubt on the wedding. And I don’t understand the “pride” of the family being married at 19 and you are 20.
Don’t compare yourself to others is the number one thing. And if you don’t want to invite all those people…just use your venue to elope! Just have yourself and your fiance and if you want any family that you think will respect your marriage there.
Post # 9

Member
220 posts
Helper bee
I wish I could just elope at my venue…It is beautiful…But by booking we agree to pay for food for 50 people minimum…And even if I have the wedding as planned we are not gonna have 50 people there….food they serve is a total junk…I just went for the venue itself…And agreed for the food because the place is pretty…Now I regret.
Post # 10

Member
4 posts
Wannabee
I agree with Ambrocked. You don’t have to prove a damn thing to anyone. If your friends and family are going to judge you for this, then they have their ownn issues and you definitely don’t need to make them your issues too. Do your wedding your way and if anyone tries to give you a hard time, just smile sweetly and tell them that you’re quite happy with everything and that the most important thing is the love you and your fiance share. If that doesn’t shut them up, keep smiling and walk away. Don’t let the haters bring you down!
Post # 11

Member
227 posts
Helper bee
@fadeastride: exactly!! =)