Post # 1
I hear it all the time… “I worked full time through undergrad,” “My GPA was (CRAZY HIGH NUMBER HERE) during undergrad, when I was also working full time.” “I had a baby AND worked AND nursed sick puppies during undergrad.”
Ugh. I’m feeling like a failure b/c I’m having trouble working my measly 5-10 hours per week and keeping my grades up in 16 hours of courses and giving Fiance enough attention and trying not to gain 40lbs in school. And I’m broke. ‘Cause I quit a really lucrative job to do this and I know it was the right decision, but still. Suck.
How do you superwomen do it? And how does your relationship not fall by the wayside?
Basically, PLEASE tell me I’m doin’ it wrong, and it can, in fact, be done.
OH! ETA: Please indicate if you also went to a school that only offered the classes you need during the day. No night school option for this Bee ^^
Post # 3
It’s not a lot of fun, but I pretty much spend all of my free time doing schoolwork.H and my “together time” is him watching TV while I’m on the couch doing schoolwork. I think the most important thing is to manage your time and make sure you don’t get caught in time wasters like watching TV or Internet browsing
Post # 4
I have worked full time through GRAD school for the past 3 years. You have to utilize time management. Make a day where you do no school work and focus on Fiance. For me that has always been Friday night. No school, no work, we have a date night or just stay home and cuddle.
Post # 5
Going through LPN school I worked a FT and a PT job; I’m now in RN school which is extremely time consuming and working FT nights. I agree with a PP that you need to have a day where you devote that day entirely to everything else but school. Fridays are that day for me bc I’m in class all day Thursday from 8-4. I have the first part of the day alone and then the rest is for DH. I have always been taught that it is the quality not quantity of study time. You can study for 4 hrs and not retain the knowledge needed if you are not studying correctly. I know it sounds odd but there are ways to this that makes it conductive. I don’t have study sessions longer than 2 hrs at a time bc you burn out and you will not retain the information. Things like my house being spotless etc just are not on my radar during these times.
Post # 6
I went to school full time, worked full time, and had a baby – but my grades definitely showed it! So I dropped to part time work and then eventually stopped working for about 6 months because of depression following my mother’s death. So ya, don’t feel bad for not being “superwoman”. Something has to give somewhere because there are only 24 hours in a day! But good luck none the less!
Post # 7
I had slightly more work than you but the same credit load and managed to make it work but it sucked. I don’t know how I did it. I think I just spent a lot of time on schoolwork and made sure I took two nights a week off to devote to Fiance. He was working a similar schedule so it sort of worked out for us!
Post # 8
i was in a happy relationship and worked 18-24 hours a week (over the weekend) when i was an undergrad. i usually had 18 credit hours. i was a chem eng major. i couldn’t imagine working full-time. most of my classmates didn’t work at all, or only worked during the summer, and i always got grumbled at because i couldn’t meet up for group work on the weekends because of my job.
Post # 9
I didnt work during college except for a computer monitor job where I basically got paid to do my homework. I think I would have gone nuts working and going to school FT for under grad. None of my friends really worked during undergrad. I did part time (2 class) while working full time for grad school though.
My husband worked full 40 hr week while going to undergrad and graduated with like 3.7 in engineering while partying hard too. I have no idea how he did it. We did the same grad program.
I dont know how people with KIDS do it… I think i’d just be a zombie. Props to working, going to school moms!!!
Post # 10
I didn’t vote because I have worked part time. I have always worked part time and gotten through without too much stress (asides from the usual amount of school stress). Does your work offer a part time option? I don’t mind it at all 🙂
Post # 11
I tried working almost full time hours during school and I wanted to shoot myself. I was also taking 12 credits at a time. Last semester, I was taking 18 credits and worked about 20 hours a week and that was probably the most miserable I’ve been since I started college. This semester, I’m working 5.5 hours a week, one shift on Sunday, and taking 18 credits. I’m pretty sure I’m still going to end up stressed because of school, but at least I won’t be fighting for time between school, work and my relationship. My fiance and I don’t get to see each other a lot because my schedule is so messed up, but we’ve found a way to make it work.
Post # 12
During my first round of college, I worked very part time (like 10-12 hours a week) and took full time classes. No relationship. At the time, I couldn’t imagine working more than that and focusing on school. I eventually dropped out, not for lack of time but because I needed to figure out what I wanted to do.
NOW….I’m married, I work part time (20-35 hours, depending on the week), and I go to school full time. It’s not fun. My first semester back in school I worked a job that involved working every weekend, which was the worst. My husband and I had a date night once a week, but our time together was pretty sporatic other than that. It really put a strain on our relationship, to be honest. This semester I’m in a new job, working mostly afternoons plus some morenings. I generally have time to work on homework in the mornings and evenings and still take time to relax with my husband on the weekends when we’re both off. It works much, much better. Even so, I have to be pretty strict with time management (which means I should probably get off of here…:-P).
I also learned to prioritize with homework. Writing assignments always get done. Reading?…heh, not always. But I’ve learned which classes require more and which classes I can get away with doing less. I’m a good student, but when you’re balancing life, you have to be realistic about those things.
Oh, I should add, too, that my program (child growth and development) is aimed at students who work full time so classes are mostly evenings, online, or even at your work site, which helps.
Post # 13
I worked full time and was in a relationship, but, the key to my success was take classes very part time. I have 2 associates and I’m 2 classes away from my bachelors but its taken me YEARS to do it. I’m a couple years behind my peers. I work with a crazy lady like that. Works full time, did a masters full time, is happily married. I could never manage it.
Post # 14
I worked on and off throughout undergrad. My last year I worked pretty much full time and kept up a relationship but it was hard. I am now finishing up grad school while being 400 miles away from my Fiance and I can’t work because I have a full time unpaid internship that I have to complete 🙁 It sucks being broke and trying to maintain a relationship, especially from 400 miles away. I guess for me I wanted this degree so bad that I was willing to sacrafice a few other things to be selfish for a bit and follow my dreams. Thank god I have a Fiance that was willing to support me and deal with this long distance crap for 2 years. It’s not easy, and I guarantee those other people didn’t think it was easy, but they did it because they had to! I really don’t have any great advice except for follow your dreams and do what is most important to you right now…. Everything else will fall into place eventually!
Post # 15
I really think a lot of it depends on what degree program you’re in…my first degree was in English– I worked all the time, got great grades, and had a Fiance. Now I’m knee deep in my second degree– Civil Engineering– have a husband, a baby on the way, and get pretty good grades. I worked my first semester of Engineering school and it was a complete waste of energy. I was always stressed and my grades suffered. I will work no more lol. I have learned an English degree is not equal at all to an Engineering degree (for me, at least).
There are lots of other factors too. Number of credits is a big one– last semester I enrolled full time at two colleges and knocked out 28 credits in a semester with a 3.5. Some people take the minimum of 12.
Some people are really good at multitasking their lives and being stressed out all the time. I wasn’t, so my hubby and I looked at finances and realized that it didn’t matter if I worked. Long term goals definitely outweighed the short term benefits of a little extra cash in our case 🙂
Post # 16
This is all super useful advice, thanks Bees :). I think I’m freaking out b/c our wedding is in May, and we’re also moving in April, apparently (thanks landlord).
Hearing that it sucks for the people who were able to do it is making me not feel like such a slacker. I’m currently looking for some evening work, because my classes run until 3-3:30pm right now.
Also bumping for more poll responses!