(Closed) **Please Share your **biggest Regrets** incl photos

posted 8 years ago in Emotional
Post # 227
Member
451 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

Its been 8 months and there are a few things I regret however 8 months later I am happier then ever with my husband:

1) Pictures- I didnt get a bunch of pictures I wanted i.e.(Me and all of my bridesmaids rings [all of them were married], my something blue something borrowed etc.., more of my and hubby, me and all of the children in our wedding party, me and my hubbys parents)

2) My dress- While I loved my dress I wish I had added some type of strap. I lost too much weight the couple of weeks before the wedding and the top was too big and slide down much of the night.

3) Our DJ- I posted a huge post about him awhile back.. it was such a disaster.

4) My biggest regret- Not starting to loose weight earlier.. I felt like a huge whale in my pictures and not beautiful at all..

Post # 228
Member
150 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

My regrets: 

  • Waiting until the day-of to have everyone help set up while I was getting my hair & makeup done. We got the flowers that day, and they all wilted (luckily it worked in the ceremony section.. but the reception it looked horrible). 
  • Although everyone knew I wanted the sound system up front for my singer to be heard while walking down the aisle, nobody set it up.. so half-way down the aisle, I couldn’t hear anything.. it was like a death march. 
  • Also while waiting until the day of, my Mother-In-Law got a bunch of strawberries for the chocolate fountain and I was going to have that set out for the reception. Comes to find out it never got set out because my Step Mother-In-Law let someone borrow the chocolate fountain and a piece was missing.. so they didn’t set out the strawberries either. This made me so upset afterward, because that money went to complete waste! 
  • My Maid/Matron of Honor said she would also be my wedding planner.. but that didn’t work out at all. She thinks she helped out but then says afterward that I was “a bride that couldn’t make up her mind for anything to do with the wedding”.. 
  • Inviting my DH’s cousin. His cousin brought my DH’s ex girlfriend as his “date” to the wedding. Drama much? 
  • I wish that I had clarified that I didn’t want round tables along with the rectangle tables I had picked out. Someone decided to put round tables in the reception area so certain families made “groups” with the round tables. This also made me upset because that’s exactly what I didn’t want. Both my DH’s family and my family are divorced,.. so the whole “choose a seat and not a side” thing did not work at all.
  • Speaking of the “choose a seat and not a side”, that was one of the signs I had made that ended up in the ceremony section instead of the reception area… so it confused our guests. 

Don’t worry, I only have three other things.. ! 

  • I wish I had sat down and ate first with everyone during the reception. I was wanting to dance first, but they already set the food out when we got to the reception. So, I let everyone eat while I danced. Somehow, this prevented my Maid/Matron of Honor from reminding me that they needed to do a speech. So no speeches were made.
  • We didn’t have a DJ but just had a sound system hooked to an IPod, somebody kept turning up the music, then turning it down. I’m not sure if this was the reason, but nobody danced at our wedding. 
  • Right after the rehearsal, the night before the wedding, we were told by my DH’s dad that he didn’t want any alchohol at our wedding (since it was at his house).. I understood that, but couldn’t we have known this sooner? 

Sorry, some of these are regrets on my part, and some are just things that made me really annoyed. Luckily, the only real negative with the ceremony portion was the sound system. 

Post # 230
Member
32 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: October 2012

I am soooo glad to see that I am not the only person with these type of regrets. I was feeling so terrible because overall I loved my wedding. Unfortunately looking back on it all, there are definitely things I would have done differently. 

  • First and foremost, I would have hired my friend (who is a phenomenal event planner). I was determined to keep my wedding under $5,000 (which I did), so I really didn’t think I could afford to hire my friend. I wish I had that extra help though. 
  • I, like a few others, don’t have any nice, full length pics of the back of my dress. The beading on the back and the train are so pretty, but I completely forgot to ask for a photo. My friend took one from a distance during the ceremony, but it’s not very clear. 
  • I wouldn’t have planned an outdoor ceremony… in October… in Ohio. I was convinced the weather would be nice enough to hold the ceremony in an outdoor gazebo behind the hall. Unfortunately it rained all day the day before so the grass was muddy and wet. We had to move the ceremony inside, and the guests sat at their tables. Bonus: some of our guests took some fantastic photos from their tables lol 
  • I wouldn’t have listened to other people who told me to wait to do my bouquet until the day before the wedding. With everything else I had going on, I ended up making my bouquet and all of the boutonnieres at 4am the night before.
  • We had a daytime wedding, which ppl seemed to enjoy when it was all said and done. However, I felt like the day was so rushed. I wanted a bit more time getting ready and taking pics with my lovely ladies. I would have definitely made it a little later.
  • I wouldn’t have changed my mind about my centerpieces at the last minute. I wasn’t going to have time to complete the original centerpieces on my own, so I changed them completely to something simpler. It was cute, but it wasn’t want I had imagined for my day. 

Post # 231
Member
25 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: November 2012

I have a few regrets…people tell me that they had a great time at our wedding. I did too. But now there are things that bug me a lot.

Ceremony:

Having ceremony in the reception hall… wasn’t as pretty as I imagined, plus there are things in the background I really wish weren’t there (hello Photoshop) I think the aisle was too wide as well now. Wish I hadn’t walked up through the reception tables. I have now thought of another way I should have done it. Grrr. Over all I don’t think the ceremony looks pretty at all. Our reception looked nice though as we could turn the overhead lights off and use our up lighting and the light ball over the dance floor.

Walking down aisle I didn’t look at photographer at all, so there isn’t a great shot of me walking down the aisle. And I had an issue with my hoop skirt just before ceremony so I had to take it off and kept stepping on my dress so I kept looking down in the shots. Plus I think I held my bouquet too high.

Wish I had decorated aisle…decided against it for easy swap to the dance floor, but I think it’s so bare in the photos. I didn’t think I’d care. I thought lots about it and in the end decided not to worry too much for an easy swap. We just had the aisle chairs decorated. Now I wish I had just done it.

We had a sign ‘pick a seat not a side’…which no one paid attention too. Not really our fault but still.

The outside of the hall isn’t so nice, not really ‘weddingy’ but we chose it for it proximity, size, cost and etc.

Reception:

The biggest thing is the tables…they looked exactly what I wanted them too. BUT we only had a few set up as we decided to have a part standing reception to encourage people to mingle, move and dance. We did not have a bridal table as husband and I did not plan to sit at all and we didn’t. (I literally dance ALL night long). But I feel bad about the tables now. People did dance and mingle…BUT the people, who sat at the tables to start, kinda hijacked them the whole night. They were really just there to sit while you ate and then move on. We had a buffet of finger food and a sandwich bar instead of a sit down meal (and we had more than enough to feed three times the people we had). We also had spare chairs around in groups for people to sit but I wish I had left a few more of those around too. We had enough seating for about ¾ of guests (We actually got this idea from another couple to try to make sure people didn’t just sit ALL night). I just wish we had set up a couple of more tables. I’m not sure if anyone cared…but I feel bad about it now. That idea didn’t go so well.

I took my veil off as soon as we got back to the hall as everyone kept yanking my head during photos and hugs! I just couldn’t stand it…but I wish I had gotten more use out of it now 🙁

I had a lot more things I wanted to make for our decorations etc, but I just run out of time. So I just got done what I could but I really wish I could have done them. Also there was some things decoration wise I decided not to do…thinking we had enough or I changed to something simpler but now I wish I had tried to do it. I wanted it to look more…amazing I guess.

A lot of my frustration is caused by the fact that really thought about every aspect of our wedding and still there are things I wish I could change. Some things just didn’t work out the way I wanted…in saying that though there are a lot of things that turned out the way I wanted or better. So I try to focus on that. It’s hard though. It helped to come here to read about others peoples regrets, makes me feel like I’m not the only one and venting it seems to help too

 

Post # 232
Member
25 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: July 2013

im learming so much in this thread!!!
my wedding is in July and i had actually overlooked certain things about the day.thanks for sharing your stories ladies!

Post # 233
Member
2376 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: January 2013

im not even married yet and i already regret inviting my aunts and uncles from my mums side (there are 8, + their wives/husbands)

we were all at my cousins wedding on Saturday and they all left straight after the dinner, no one stayed past 8pm (i found that rude, esp cos the next day was a sunday) and they could barely say Hi to me.

GRRRRR wish they werent invited to mine now 🙁 is it too late to un-invite them?? lol. . .

Post # 234
Member
291 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

Love this thread!

Post # 235
Member
22 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: August 2015

Thanks for tall the inside information Bees. It has definitely helped me rethnk some of my details. 

Post # 236
Member
594 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

great thread !

Post # 237
Member
128 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

I have some to post, commenting to be able to find this thread later on this week!

Post # 238
Member
128 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

It really does help to read about things that went wrong at other people’s weddings.  It puts things into perspectivre and helps you realize that no wedding is perfect!  

The first thing for me is something I want to share just because it is so crazy and laughable, it honestly didn’t bother me too much.  I got married in the fall.  I knew it would be chilly and was totally fine with it.  These are the high temperatures for four of the saturdays right around my wedding.  Can you guess which day I got married on?

#1: 82 degrees

#2: 57 degrees

#3: 36 degrees

#4: 68 degrees

That’s right people, my wedding day was #3!  I’m used to crazy temperature changes where I live but come on!  This was funny but I was ok with it.  I don’t think it was that obvious how cold we were in our pictures:

Two daysbefore my wedding my makeup artist called.  She was in Florida, supposed to be flying home that day.  However, her husband was in the hospital with chest pains.  She didn’t end up making it back in time for the wedding.  I totally understand this, but was super bummed.  She does such a great job and I was SO looking forward to having her to make me look beautiful.  In the end I did my own makeup (something I’m perfectly comfortable with).  But i do wish she could have been there.

 

Something I do regret though is how crabby I was on the morning of.  It was just so stressful and I never realized how much I dislike all eyes on me.  I read about brides who had a lovely morning sipping champagne and chatting with her friends the morning of her wedding.  I was not that girl.  It was more like running around crazy, trying to stick to the time schedule, and being annoyed with everyone and anyone.  I really wish I could do that over.  Here’s a picture of us girls getting ready.  You can see the uptight looks on everyone’s faces.  They scream, “Make bridezilla happy!”  oops:

 

DH’s cousin was supposed to do the petitions at our Mass.  She unfortunately couldn’t even make it to the wedding after having complications from having her wisdom teeth removed.  I, of all people, understand this because I had the worst time ever with wisdom teeth just 5 months before the wedding.  The cousin’s mother was sort of our wedding coordinater and I love her for all her help.  However, her solution to the problem was to just find another family member to do the petitions.  I didn’t even know any of this until during the mass.  If I would have been asked, I would have said I wanted one of the aunts who were doing the readings to just do the petitions as well.  The replacement was one of DH’s aunts who neither of us really even care for.  And, she mispronouced the name of my cousin who had just passed suddenly 2 weeks before. (The final petition remembered deceased loved ones.) The whole situation just really grinds my gears.

 

My bustle didn’t hold up very well but I never even noticed! I was pulled to the side a few times while people tried to fix it to no avail.  It didn’t bother me too much, just looking back at some pictures from the reception, it looks a bit sloppy.  Oh well.

Darling Husband and I met freshman year of highschool.  We dated all throughout high school and almost all of the highschool friends we invited came.  I had given my DJ written instructions to call all of us to the dance floor for a big group picture during the reception, but somehow that didn’t happen.  DH remided me a few days after the wedding, I hadn’t even remembered. Oops!

The lights were on during mine and DH’s first dance.  Someone finally thought to dim them halfway through the father daughter dance.  Not too big of a deal, but looking back I just wish it would have been done sooner.  Here’s a pic from omy dad and I (lights on), and DH’s dance with is mom, when the lights were dimmed:

Lastly,  my awesome aunt had made the cutest “Thank You” banner for us to take pictures with, with the intent of using that for our thank you cards.  Somehow, the banner was completely forgotten.  It was with me all night in my bag, but completely forgotten while we were taking pictures.  This was one of my saddest regrets, because it would have been SO simple to whip it out and take a quick picture at any point of the night, but no one remembered! (I guess i should have put someone in charge of that.  Luckily, my awesome photographer (also my cousin)  used photoshop and came up with something presentable: 

 

So there you have it.  I also wanted to include this, from pinterest.  It is definitely important to keep reminding yourself:

Post # 239
Member
715 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2012 - W Hotel Silicon Valley

I really wish we had planned out our between-ceremony-and-reception photography better and had a better game plan. I don’t have a picture of my siblings and I, which I really wish I had. 

At the time though, I was just enjoying the day and trying to be carefree. 

Post # 240
Member
297 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

commenting for later! Thanks for sharing Bees

Post # 241
Member
488 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

tagging post to come back later.  Thank you to all the brides for sharing, it helps alot to look over everything again before my wedding.

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