(Closed) **Please Share your **biggest Regrets** incl photos

posted 8 years ago in Emotional
Post # 421
Member
203 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

My biggest regret was not listening to my gut feeling when it came to the hairdresser.  My mom suggested asking a friend who manages a ‘chop shop’ style salon (think quick cuts, no color etc).  This hairdresser has worked at nice salons in the past and has done my hair in the past as well, so I was comfortable with the idea.

When it came time for my hair trial (about 6 weeks prior to the wedding), she canceled due to family stuff.  As my wedding was 1800 km’s away from where I live, I wasn’t going to be back till the week of the wedding, and told her the trial wasn’t necessary.  We confirmed that she’d be at the house at 10am on the day of, and would do hair for myself, and my bridal party.

On my wedding morning the make up artist/photographer arrived and started doing the bridesmaids makeup, we were all relaxed, having breakfast, enjoying a nice morning out on the deck.  10:15 rolled around and the hairdresser wasn’t there yet.  I messaged her saying that I was hoping she was on the way, to which I got a response that basically said that since the trial didn’t happen she thought I didn’t want her to do my hair.  I didn’t respond the that, we made calls and managed to get appointments with salons in town, but the stress of the situation led to my feeling sick to my stomach the entire day, arguments with my mom (who then decided that she also wanted to get her hair done), and going from a relaxed day to a rushed and stressed out day.

I also regret (but to a much lesser degree) not arranging for ushers.  Guests were in the lobby of the church mingling, we were all there on time and ready to go, but couldn’t start till people all sat down.  I had meant to ask a couple of the groomsmen to do that, but forgot.  It wasn’t a big deal, but we did start about 15 minutes late.

Post # 422
Member
39 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: September 2014

I just got married 9/6/14 and I do havea few regrets.  My caterer was horrible- the food was good, but dealing with him was an absolute nightmare.  We paid for sit down, the day before the wedding he gave me no choice and changed it to buffet.  He gave me all kinds of excuses why but it came down to him not having enough staff.  I did not want buffet- even though it went smoothly and no one seemed to care- I did.  I should have followed my gut, he was hard to deal with leading up to it.  Then we ended up fighting with him over the refund because of the cost difference of sit down vs. buffet and ruined the end of our rehearsal dinner.  It was terrible.  We did get a refund, but I would have rather had what we paid for. 

And I never unbustled my dress for the ceremony.  We got married outside and it rained until a few hours nefore the ceremony.  It was bustled for pictures since we walking around, but I am so mad no one saw the small train.  And the dress looks better with it down.  ๐Ÿ™  You can see it bustled in the picture. 

I regret not hiring a videographer.  The ceremony and reception went so fast- it was like a lur. The pictures are great, but  Iwould have loved to watch what I missed.  Our friend did video the ceremony, so hopefully we have at least that.  I haven’t seen it yet.  My advice is to hire a videaographer.  :/

But the ceremony was wonderful- so personal and emothional.  Not a dry eye in the gazebo.  My children all did a great job and read a poem about family that made me cry.  And the reception was all that I hoped for. 

Post # 423
Member
39 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: September 2014

I just got married 9/6/14 and I do have a few regrets.  My caterer was horrible- the food was good, but dealing with him was an absolute nightmare.  We paid for sit down, the day before the wedding he gave me no choice and changed it to buffet.  He gave me all kinds of excuses why but it came down to him not having enough staff.  I did not want buffet- even though it went smoothly and no one seemed to care- I did.  I should have followed my gut, he was hard to deal with leading up to it.  Then we ended up fighting with him over the refund because of the cost difference of sit down vs. buffet and ruined the end of our rehearsal dinner.  It was terrible.  We did get a refund, but I would have rather had what we paid for. 

And I never unbustled my dress for the ceremony.  We got married outside and it rained until a few hours nefore the ceremony.  It was bustled for pictures since we walking around, but I am so mad no one saw the small train.  And the dress looks better with it down.  ๐Ÿ™  You can see it bustled in the picture. 

I regret not hiring a videographer.  The ceremony and reception went so fast- it was like a lur. The pictures are great, but  Iwould have loved to watch what I missed.  Our friend did video the ceremony, so hopefully we have at least that.  I haven’t seen it yet.  My advice is to hire a videaographer.  :/

But the ceremony was wonderful- so personal and emothional.  Not a dry eye in the gazebo.  My children all did a great job and read a poem about family that made me cry.  And the reception was all that I hoped for. 

Post # 424
Member
56 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: July 2014

I regret spending money on my day-of-coordinator. Ugggghhh it still upsets me and it’ been over two months. Here is a list of things that I should really get over,  it I can’t:

 

– she didn’t ensure that wine glasses were at the tables with the water glasses. The wine glasses ended up being used for the cocktail hour, so by dinner time, none of the glasses I rented were clean. I quickly noticed this, and asked her to fix it. About halfway through dinner, people started getting their wine glasses (after they were put in the dishwasher at the reception site). I guess that explains why we have so much wine left over. 

– I was told by family and friends who were helping to set up the venue that she had no idea what was going on. She wouldn’t give any directions, and she brought an assistant who also knew nothing of what was happening. Thankfully, the assistant was sweet. Not the coordinator. She was apparently unfriendly and difficult to talk to.

-we had a candy buffet, and instead of my coordinator ensuring that the candy bowls remain filled, she chose to spend the rest of the night sitting by the DJ and watching us party. I have photos of this. We ended up with over half of the candy, despite the candy buffet being a hit

– the caterers were mixed up with the contract end time, so they tried to leave early. My coordinator came to pluck me off the dance floor to tell me that the caterers were going to start cleaning up. I had to get my phone, find the email with our agreed contract time, hand it to my coordinator so that she could show the caterers. Way to burst my bubble while I’m trying to enjoy my wedding. 

Overall I was not impressed with her. But despite those issues, my husband and I had the time of our lives. I attribute so much of what went right to all the friends and family who helped me that day. 

Post # 425
Member
190 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: May 2015

Tagging this so I remember to read thoroughly later.. and take notes! 

Post # 426
Member
437 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

MrsFairyBee:  i did this EXACT same thing! i was too busy looking at everyone else and being in a crazy daze i didn’t look at my DH! hahahaha oh dear! I love this shot of me and my Grandma though! we are super close and she is nearly 90! It’s a lovely moment captured! ๐Ÿ™‚ x

Post # 427
Member
2 posts
Wannabee
  • Wedding: August 2014

randombee:  

I felt I really had the perfect day of my dreams! Looking back I would have done a couple things different if I could have even if it cost me a little more.

1) The biggest thing is having someone who is not key family or friends handling the last minute details on your wedding day. My family was busy setting everything up for the ceremony and reception the morning of the wedding (we had a late morning wedding). We didn’t get to spend any time together before the ceremony. I had planned to have 30 minutes to an hour to take photos, exchange gifts and savor the moment, but everyone was running around getting ready until the last moment (except me and my photographer). I also had a friend step up to help out with directing the timing of when people should go down the aisle. I wish I had hired a wedding coordinator to do these important last minute things rather than relying on family and friends, so they could enjoy the day with me too.

2) As I was getting married outdoors I choose to wear my dress bustled up for the walk down the aisle and during the reception, but had planned to take some photos with the dress train down. I forgot to do this in the excitement of the moments with friends and family after the ceremony when we planned our photos. I wish I had a few photos of just me in my dress and some with the full train. I loved my dress! I also should have touched up my hair and make-up at least once during the festivities, but the day just flew by and we were having too much fun.

3) I spent a lot of extra money on a dance floor for our outdoor tent. My first dance with my husband and my father-daughter dance were priceless, but I wonder if I could have still done this differently to save on the costs of the dance floor. Many guests commented how they liked our music yet hardly any guests got out and danced except for the “Anniversary Dance”. My husband assures me we didn’t have dancing people at our wedding, but I wish more people had gotten out on the dance floor with us so I could better justify the added costs. In other words if you don’t have a dancing crowd attending think twice about spending the money.

Hope everyone enjoys their wedding days!

 

 

Post # 428
Member
2 posts
Wannabee
  • Wedding: August 2014

I loved my wedding day! No regrest – just lessons learned.

1) Don’t have your family setting up for the ceremony and reception. Hire comeone to do this (it’s worth it). My family and I despite my family didn’t get to savor those key moments before the walk down the aisle for all the hustle and bustle. I had planned 30 minutes to an hour to exchange gifts with them and take photos. I wish I’d hired a wedding coordinator just for the day of the wedding or something.

2) Make sure you get photos of your wedding dress with the train down. I wore my dress bustled up for the outdoor ceremony and reception, but had planned to take it don for our photos and got caught up in all the excitement and forgot. I loved my dress and would have enjoyed having pictures in the train to enjoy.

All the best on your weddings!

Post # 429
Member
152 posts
Blushing bee

Posting to read later ๐Ÿ™‚

 

Post # 430
Member
1341 posts
Bumble bee

I’m surprised to read how many brides had their dress bustled from the get to. I was so paranoid about mine being stepped on and dirty but glad I listened to my Maid/Matron of Honor who stopped me fron bustling until after the first dance. I was going to do it before the reception originally but not for photos. It changes the whole look of a dress in my opinion. May as well get one without a train if you don’t want it. 

Post # 431
Member
519 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

oh yeah I wanted to add….We took my Darling Husband out of the photos so that we could get a four generation picture with my Gram, Mom, Sister and Nieces and I. We did his family photos before this, a few larger ones with my family, but we forgot to have him come back into the photos afterwards. So I literally have photos of my parents, with just me, and not my parents and both him and I, like we did with his family.  I completely didn’t realize this until after we got our photos back, was summer bummed, considered re-taking pictures, but decided it wouldnt be the same day..so it wouldn’t be worth it, oh well.

Post # 432
Member
558 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2015 - Thorpewood

I haven’t gotten married yet but we just got our engagement photos back.  I was flip flopping about whether or not to wear jeans or a skirt in the photos and I ended up going with the skirt to be more feminine.  I wish I had stuck with my gut and done jeans because, while I think the photos are ok, I really believe I would have liked them better if I were in jeans.  BUT this is a lesson learned I suppose.  Always go with my gut instinct.  ๐Ÿ™‚

Post # 433
Member
71 posts
Worker bee

definitely need to read this later!

Post # 434
Member
72 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: October 2015 - Hidden Acres

Tagging in, but these are great lessons to learn from! 

Post # 435
Member
615 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2016

Commenting to find for future reference! Thanks for being so candid ladies ~

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