(Closed) Please share your home birth experience

posted 6 years ago in Babies
Post # 5
Member
755 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: February 2016

Ohhh boy I’m expecting things to get heated here….

I’m an ER doctor in a major inner city emergency room. I’ve seen a number of home birth disasters come through our doors, many of which have had life-changing consequences for both mums and bubs. I think this woman’s comments are completely reasonable. Birth is unpredictable. Things can go unpredictably and horribly wrong, even in a textbook “low risk” pregnancy. 

Yes this woman had relatively “rare” complications – although a shoulder dystocia rate of 0.5% is one in every 500 births. So it’s not THAT rare, and it’s life-threatening to the baby.

If you are one of the majority of women who has a nice easy birth which all goes to plan then that’s great. But if you are one of the women who experiences something unexpected you want to be somewhere where the resuscitation equipment and medical expertise needed to save the life of your baby (and of yourself in some cases) are available immediately rather than a 20 minute ambulance ride away.

Post # 6
Member
1937 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

I don’t think it should get heated. We are all allowed to choose the birth we want and feel how we want when it’s over. Not everyone is satisfied with a home birth and not everyone is satisfied with a hospital birth. Things can go wrong in both situations. I’ve read stories about doctors   harming babies with forceps, c sections going horribly wrong, hospital staff who don’t care about the mother or child, just when they get off their shift. Does that mean all hospitals are risky? No. We just have to decide what kind of risks to take and where.

Her experience absolutely is valid and she can be as anti home birth as she wants, she almost lost her son. But judging other moms or shaming them for their choice to have one is no different than a mother who had a horrible, life altering c section and criticizing anyone that would evsn think about birthing in a hospital. 

 

For me personally, I will be choosing a home birth because there is a greater chance of unnecessary medical intervention in a hospital than of complications in a birth at home (assuming a low risk Pregnancy). I understand that doesn’t mean things will go perfectly, and hospitals aren’t evil, I will be choosing the option that I (personally) feel has less risk for me and my baby.

It musr also be said that the midwife you have makes all the difference. It might be that she really did have a terrible team around her, that did NOT know what to do in an emergency. midwives are supposed to be trained, specialized professionals that can keep calm under pressure even when things aren’t perfect. It’s important to do an extensive interview process to ensure that they have the right tools and experience necessary to handle a situation gone wrong. 

 

I do feel so bad for her experience, and that her little boy almost didn’t come home. I would never blame her for feeling the way she does and I hope she eventually can heal and come to peace. 

Post # 7
Member
233 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2014

I just had a wonderful home birth 3 days ago. I lIve in Canada so midwives are trained and certified by provincial government health boards. They are trained in much more than administering an oxygen tank. My bedroom looked a bit like a mobile emergency room. Anyways, I labored at home for only 8 hours, mostly in my tub. My labor was so intense that I went from 3cm to 8cm in 2 hours and spent just under an hour pushing after that. My son was born in the water in his amniotic sac, but there was some meconium in the fluid. The midwives checked him thoroughly and I was never worried about his health. The midwives are very cautious and would have gone to the hospital immediately if there was even a hint of an issue. They have been back everyday to check

on us at home. Not having to leave home has been the most amazing thing ever!!!

Post # 8
Member
1432 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 2013

Two of my sisters-in-law had uneventful home births – That is 5 children altogether!

Personally, I’m going with an OBGYN at a hospital, and I think even if I had a midwife I’d prefer a hospital birth, but to each her own!

Post # 9
Member
861 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

I agree with 

View original reply
Equine_Breeder: – this isn’t a negative article, it’s a woman sharing her true life negative experience with a home birth. There are risks to a home birth, and this is an illustration of them, just like people who complain about uncaring staff, unnecessary medical interventions, doctors on timelines etc. in a hospital birth. For me, I preferred the safety of having staff on hand if something went wrong, so I had a hospital birth. With any birth choice, you should think it through. This is one aspect of what should be thought through when you’re making that decision. 

Post # 10
Member
165 posts
Blushing bee

Anecdotal evidence is not scientific evidence.  I have read equally horrifying birth stories from hospital births, and I have also read beautiful/uneventful birth stories from both locations.  The point is that we should not judge home birth or hospital birth based off of one woman’s experience.  The important thing is to look at the statistics.  Statistically, if you are low-risk your baby is just as likely to die at home as s/he is at a hospital, but the mother is much less likely to have interventions/birth injury at home.  Life has risks no matter what choices we make, and it should be up to mom to make an informed choice that is right for her.  Unfortunately our society tends to point the finger at home birth horror stories and say, “See?  This is dangerous.”  Whereas with hospital horror stories people tend to just say, “This was just one of those freak tragedies.”

Post # 11
Member
59 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: January 2013

I haven’t had any children myself yet, however my aunt had a home birth. The people who were on hand with her were the most useless, uninformed, uneducated bunch of idiots I have ever had the misfortune to come across. Both her and the baby died. It tore our family apart.

In my opinion, home births are both completely unecessary in this century, and one of the most backwards, selfish and dangerous things someone can choose to do and I honestly believe that it should be compulsary for women to give birth in hospital if it is possible.

Post # 12
Member
1937 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

View original reply
MrsRs:  oh man, I am so sorry for your loss. What an awful thing to have happen! Unfortunately  women die in hospitals too. Making something MANDATORY is not the answer. You said so herself, a team of useless people standing around scratching their heads in an emergency is the problem, not the home birth. If a bunch of doctors stood around and had no idea what they were doing, it would be the same result in a hospital. It was the people that failed her, not the home birth experience itself. 

Post # 13
Member
59 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: January 2013

View original reply
Equine_Breeder:  I understand what you’re saying. But what my aunt needed was blood, and not a woman holding a towel to try and stem the bleeding saying ‘everyone bleeds a bit, it’ll stop soon.’ If she’d been in the hospital she would almost definitely be alive today. The same for the baby.

Because of the amount of cancer treatment I’ve had, the chances of me and my husband having a child is almost non-existant. When I hear about people putting themselves and their children at risk during childbirth, possibly being so far away from any medical interventions they need, it just hits me like a brick.

When people mention homebirths, I remember how, two days before Christmas, a woman told me that I was causing unecessary drama by saying that we needed to phone for an amubulance, while my aunt bled out and another woman was telling my uncle that there was nothing to worry about – even though his newborn son had stopped breathing. 

These women pushed an idea of a magical home-birth on my aunt, coupled with fear mongering about pain relief and the ‘unnatural’ trauma of c-sections – which is what she, and the baby, desperately needed. 

Being in a hospital gives everyone involved a chance when things go wrong. And things do go wrong.

  • This reply was modified 5 years, 10 months ago by  MrsRs.
Post # 14
Member
1212 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2015

View original reply
gingerkitten:  I know a few families that have done all home births. One had a stillborn her second time. The midwife was very capable and told them the baby would have been stillborn in the hospital too. The cord wrapped around his neck. The midwife knew it as soon as it happened, and even with an emergency section, she said it would have taken too much time to get him out. It wrapped too fast and too hard. The mom has gone on to have more home births with no problems. And another family has had 4 children, all home births, no problems. The mom said she wouldn’t have it any other way. Both used the same midwife and she has IV fluids, pitocin, mag sulfate, emergency equipment, etc, all on hand if it’s needed. She also has a good relationship with an OB/GYN and the hospital in town. My birth stories are horrific and both my children and I would have died if we weren’t in the hospital. So midwifery isn’t for everyone. I’m almost finished with my nursing degree and I have given a lot of thought about going on to be a nurse midwife. I personally know what shouldn’t happen and could probably spot a problem right away. It would be such a rewarding profession. 

Post # 15
Member
1212 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2015

View original reply
MrsRs:  That is a terrible story, I am so sorry to hear about your aunt. It sounds like she had a bad midwife and I can totally see why you are against home birth. It’s not for everyone. Me included.

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