(Closed) Pls help revise my email to alcoholic friend…

posted 8 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
1212 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: December 2012

I think if you don’t want to be friends with her, you shouldn’t mention loving her always or only wanting to see her when she is sober. If I got that email I’d assume you were wanting to catch up next time you were in the same place.

Post # 5
14492 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

I think that is perfect.  I think you pointed out the problem wrapped up in a huge hug, which, is soo difficult in writing but you managed it very eloquently.  You have stated where you stand without being overly harsh.  Great job.

Post # 7
6891 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: March 2012

I think you did a very good job with a tough situation.

I do agree that it sounds like you have some hope to be friends in the future based on some wording, like loving her always or hanging out when she is sober. To me, it’s a bit of unnecessary false hope, ya know? I’d just remove/re-word those things. Otherwise, you did a great job.

Post # 9
811 posts
Busy bee

I think you’ve clearly put a lot of thought into the wording and into being sensitive and I think it looks great.

Post # 11
2699 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

I think that’s perfect 🙂

Post # 12
9825 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: April 2019

i agree with pp’s, it does sound like you want to regain your friendship in the future, i don’t think it would be too harsh to cut out those bits, but it’s up to you which you would prefer- sounding a little harsh, or possibly hanging out with her and becoming friends again.


other than that it sounds great, and very supportive 🙂

Post # 13
138 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

I agree with others that it sounds as though you still want to be friends with her, after reading the whole email I definatley got the impression you did. I would leave out the love bit etc and also the bit about only wanting to talk to her when she is sober, unfortunately once she is drunk I am sure the fact that you have told her you want to talk to her only when she is sober will not affect her desicion on whether to contact you or not, and it kind of sounds as if your saying –  “I will talk to you and visit you when you are sober” re enforcing the idea you wanna stay friends 

Post # 14
72 posts
Worker bee

My advice – and I really hope that you take it… Is don’t send it – don’t mention anything and just cut her away. She needs to get it through her head for herself. She is not going to take this ( as beautifully written as it is) as a helpful hand – and if you don’t want to be there for in the future ( which I can understand why you wouldn’t) let’s face it, it’s not one. If you want her to hate you ( and I know you don’t deserve it) but by sending this email I promise you she will. Just cut her away. She lives in another country didn’t you say? – easy wish her all the best but away from you. Simple.

Post # 15
72 posts
Worker bee

Obviously you would just think and not say that last bit.

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