Post # 1
i’m at the very start of wedding planning (yay!), and my first task is to make a guest list. however, i don’t know the rules for guests.
when inviting people, does every guest (minus couples, of course) get a “plus one”? how does that work? we’re not having a huge wedding, we’re only inviting close friends and family (his family is on one side of the country, mine is on the other, we’re having a small wedding in my home state and then probably having a party with his side of the family later). so my question is, do i give everyone a “plus one” on the list?
Post # 3
@colorofmyheart: You have to make your own rule. Etiquette dictates social units be invited together (married couples definately, long term or living together you need to make your own rule but its better to invite them as a unit). Plus ones you have to make a rule for, but in general you are going to want to give plus ones to Out of Town guests, friends who are single but won’t know anyone, people in the wedding (bridesmaids ect.), and very close family (like siblings). But in the ideal world where space and money weren’t an issue, you would give a plus one to everyone over 18.
Post # 4
Esp. for smaller weddings, setting rules on +1s is really important. They are YOUR rules, although you’ll run into trouble if you try to leave out SOs that you know about. And you will have people try to bring a +1, so you’ll need to know up front how you’re going to handle that.
We’re inviting fiances and long-term SOs, but otherwise it’s just singles. If someone specifically asks to bring a more recent SO, we’re saying it’s okay. But in situations like FI’s old fraternity brothers treating this like a formal and saying they need to find a date for it, I’m putting my foot down.
Post # 5
- Wedding: March 2012 - Pelican Grand Beach Resort
Invitations for dates go to members of established social units. That usually means people who are married, engaged, or living together. If you know a longterm couple not living together because of personal/religious conviction, you may consider them a social unit too, but unless they are in the bridal party (those people can get exceptions because of their position of honor) you should make a rule and stick to it. Additionally, the date if he/she does not live with the attendee, gets his/her OWN invititation to his/her home address.
Post # 7
Make your own rule. But be consistent!