(Closed) Plus sized problems

posted 5 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 3
74 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

What if you let all of your bridesmaids wear different dresses, within certain guidelines?  I did that, and they all worked together to find dresses that were both flattering on them while maintaining a similar ‘look’.  I love all the dresses they chose even more than the one I was thinking of choosing for them, and can’t wait to see them the day of!

With that said, the duct tape idea is super tempting…

Post # 4
271 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: January 2018

How do you feel about everyone wearing mismatched dresses? All in the same colour, but different necklines? I think it would look odd if ine dress was different, but if they all are, there’s no reason for your family to think that her size is the problem.

Alternatively, could you get straps made out of extra fabric (like ordering a wrap, or if the dress is long, using offcut fabric from hemming) for your Maid/Matron of Honor, so she can wear the same dress?

Post # 5
46606 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

I would look for a dress with straps to protect her from your family.

Post # 6
562 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

Wow. I’m sorry your family is so judgemental and that they’ve said things like that to you. 

I would say before you get too wrapped up in trying to pick a dress online, take your Maid/Matron of Honor and go try on some dresses, just the two of you. Find a few styles that she’s comfortable in and then have your size 8/10/12 maids come along and try on the styles that you and your Maid/Matron of Honor picked.

Also, keep in mind that it’s really hard to please that many people with one dress, so don’t be upset if someone isn’t in love with the final dress. That’s life and your maids shoud understand.

My maids are all different sizes and body types, and to make it harder we live in different cities (Portland/Chicago). Instead of picking one dress for all them, I went to David’s Bridal and picked out four colors that I liked and bought swatches for my maids to use when they shopped for their own dresses. I told them to get a dress that was knee-length, semi-formal, and matched the color in one of the swatches. It worked out really well and they all got to pick dresses they liked and were comfortable wearing. 

Post # 7
4682 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: January 2014

@M72727:  I agree. Or have the BMs wear dresses with straps.

Post # 8
4464 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: February 2012

Well since you know what will happen if you put in a dress that differs from your other bridesmaids then I think you for sure not go that route. Either have all the girls were mismatched dresses that work together, or pick a dress that has straps. There are plenty of great options for bridesmaids that aren’t strapless. 

Post # 9
1639 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 2013

All of the mismatched suggestions are good, I think. I did that because at the time we bought dresses one of my girls was a size 18, one was pregnant (and is plus sized to start), and the other was a size 4.

So everyone got a different dress, but in the same material and same color, and they all felt fabulous in their dresses and can’t wait to wear them. 🙂 Not everyone’s body is the same, so. And my MoH (the size 4) actually picked a short dress while the others picked a long one, so that is her “distinguishing” feature since her dress is the same color as my others.


Post # 10
1134 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

i agree go shopping with Maid/Matron of Honor alone, and once she agrees to a few dresses take the other girls shopping and tell them these are the options, and everyone needs to pick one ( and of course you get ifnal say and pick your fave outta those!)

Post # 11
8823 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2013

@Wildflower2016:  i think you should find a dress to make everyone comfortable.  why does everyone have to be in the same dress?

before my breast reduction, i had an enormously unproportional chest to the rest of my body.  i could not wear a strapless dress.  if someone told me i had to, i would have declined so I wouldn’t have to wear it.  and if i was made to wear one, i would have been miserable. 

your Maid/Matron of Honor and BMs are your nearest and dearest, don’t you want them to be comfortable?



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