(Closed) Polite way to say ‘ NO RSVP, NOT COMING!’

posted 8 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
6661 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: May 2010

Just say you have to turn in your numbers by the end of the day so if they don’t get back to you by 5pm you are going to assume they aren’t coming and unfortunately won’t be able to accomodate them.

Post # 4
3620 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

“Hi guys! Just wanted to touch base once more, as our final head count is due to the caterer. If I do not receive a response, I will have to assume that you are not going to attend, so PLEASE let me know ASAP! :)”

Or something like that?

Post # 5
68 posts
Worker bee

I don’t know the proper ettiquette, but it seems like they don’t either XP

I’d go with what @7SEVENJ9 said or something along the lines of that. I would think maybe you’d just NOT include them, but you never know if their RSVP got lost in the mail or they never got their invite. So a double check might be good?


Post # 6
1871 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: February 2011

Yeah, I’d go wtih 7Seven79’s idea, with one adjustment: give them a clear deadline, not just ASAP. “By 5 pm tomorrow, Thursday” so that they are aware.



Post # 7
6661 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: May 2010

Don’t assume they aren’t coming!! They have to commit to a response NOW and stick to it, we had so many people try to hold out until 2 weeks before the wedding to maybe see if something better came up. Some of these people actually ended up attending, so def don’t just assume.

Post # 8
7975 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

Haha, our deadline was the 12, and today I sent out an email to everyone who hadn’t responded and basically said “Haven’t heard from you, not sure if your RSVP got lost in the mail or never sent, but we need to tell our caterer how many people, so could you please let me know by the end of the week whether you’re coming and if you prefer chicken or pork! If I don’t hear from you by the end of the week, I’ll assume you either aren’t coming or don’t want to eat! :)”

But they know me, so they know that it was meant light heartedly. Also almost everyone on the list was people in their early 20s who had either 1) told me they were coming informally but never made a meal selection, or 2) I assumed wouldn’t make it anyway. I’ve been fielding emails all day and have heard from ALMOST everyone 🙂

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