(Closed) POLL! — Did YOU pick/design your own ERING?!?

posted 5 years ago in Rings
  • poll: Did you pick out your own engagement ring?
    Yes & FI was good with that. : (215 votes)
    75 %
    Yes & FI didn't love the idea. : (6 votes)
    2 %
    No, but I kinda wish I did. : (13 votes)
    5 %
    No & I'm happy I didn't. : (53 votes)
    18 %
  • Post # 46
    2580 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: November 2012

    I chose my ring from the stone, to the setting, to the color of gold. Hubby was cool with it. 

    Post # 47
    443 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: February 2015

    I’ve told this story many times.  But, my fiance knows nothing about jewelry nor what I wanted.  He asked me if he could please pay for the ring but have nothing to do with picking it out.  So, thats what happened…  I stayed in a budget we had set, ordered my stone online and dealt with a designer over CAD drawings, etc.  He really didn’t want to deal with any of that stuff and I was and still am fine with that.

    Post # 48
    335 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: August 2015

    Just two cents from the “no and I’m glad” camp: we had discussed that we were both expecting to get married eventually, but when he proposed last Christmas, it was a surprise.  BUT one thing that makes us compatible is that we both have pretty simple tastes, and neither one of us has much interest in the ins and outs of jewelry (as is evidenced by the fact that we spent 15 minutes picking out and ordering our wedding bands off of e-weddingbands.com).  He bought a simple solitare on his own, I would not have had any idea what I wanted but when he gave it to me, I was thrilled and loved it.  

    Post # 50
    1110 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: October 2014

    View original reply
    kmhuber:  Totally normal.  You’re the one that’s going to be wearing it so unless your SO knows exactly what you’re looking for and what your jewelry tastes are, some kind of input would definitely be helpful.

    I mean, I know Darling Husband very well but I didn’t choose his wedding band either, so it works both ways.

    Post # 51
    1615 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: October 2014 - Cape May

    I know it takes the surprise out if it but I see nothing wrong with picking or designing your own ring. Darling Husband picked his own wedding band and I picked my rings. If your going to wear it everyday then it needs to suit you! 

    Post # 52
    278 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: August 2015 - Red Barn Farm

    View original reply
    kmhuber:  I was very involved in the process for my e-ring. I didn’t actually pick it out, but there wasn’t a poll option for mine. I went with him to look at the rings and gave my opinions and suggestions and the sales person brought out a bunch of sapphire & diamond which is what I was interested in. My now Fiance ended up picking my ring from those choices. I actually didn’t like the e-ring he picked but she told me to try it on and imagine that I was doing my work ( I work at a desk) so she had me pretend type and from then on, I knew this was my ring! 🙂 

    Post # 53
    532 posts
    Busy bee

    I did. But it was my FIs idea. He proposed with a stand in ring so it was still a total surprise which was a must for him. He wouldn’t hear of me discussing rings before we were engaged! We went shopping together the next day to pick something id love. 

    I didn’t design a ring but decided on a stone and made some minor alterations to a solitaire setting and I was over the moon. But the jeweller didn’t listen to me AT ALL and I ended up with a completely different setting and diamond (that’s another story in itself!) but I still love it!

    i guess what I’m trying to say is that the minor details don’t matter to me now that I have the commitment from him.


    Post # 54
    366 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: June 2016

    In the process of it right now. We want and looked at rinags last weekend, didn’t find anything that I liked and are going meeting with two jewelers on Friday. I’m hoping we’ll find something simple in the settinhs that they have, custom rings are much more expensive than I thought!


    Post # 55
    6264 posts
    Bee Keeper

    It started off with him saying ‘lets look at things and then i’ll pick’, to him realising that he wanted to get me something absolutely perfect.  And I’m really glad we did go through the process together because a) what I thought I wanted didn’t actually suit me at all when we went to try on and b) the whole ring shopping experience over a couple of months was really fun.

    This has a lot to do with him being really into it and doing a lot of research on his own.  He also had very strong veiws on getting a diamond that was white looking and very good clarity.  So he definately led the way he was the one who pulled the trigger on ‘the one’ and doing the deal.

    Everytime I look at it it reminds me how he puts his heart and soul into bringing the best things in the world for us.

    On a semi practical note, spending a serious amount of funds coupled with a ‘forever’ piece of jewellery, it made sense to us to ensure it was perfect.

    Post # 56
    894 posts
    Busy bee

    Im with you. I hate the idea of him choosing it. Guys dont always understand our taste or rings or fashion (unless he does) 

    theres no way id want him to choose it alone because my fiance himself is not into fashion and he knows it and he prefers me to choose it too, so it works out for us like that

    Post # 57
    7897 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper

    We sort of did something similar. I didn’t feel the need to do extensive research beyond casual browsing online though. Darling Husband and I went to the jewelry store to look at rings, and I showed him my top 3 settings and stone styles.  Then he picked on his own. I would have been happy no matter what he chose. They were all pretty. 

    I would suggest not worrying about it. The e-ring will be great, and you will become fiance and fiancee!

    Post # 58
    15 posts
    • Wedding: June 2017

    I am the same way! I picked out my diamond and my setting; however, I will not get to see the ring as a whole until he proposes. My Boyfriend or Best Friend is clueless about jewelry and I would have hated for him to spend a large amount of money on an ering and I not like it. I am very picky. We both agreed it was the best decision for us to go together. Also, I ended up not loving the type of ring I always thought I wanted. Once I started putting them on my finger I liked a different style better. If you don’t pick it out yourself, you both should at least go look at and try on rings together just so you can make sure what you think you want it what you actually want. 

    Post # 59
    291 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: January 2016 - 1950s themed bar

    View original reply
    geekgirl84:  trying things on makes SUCH a difference! I also thought I knew what I wanted but when I saw them on? Ugh! 

    Post # 60
    35 posts
    • Wedding: February 2017

    My SO knew from the get go that I would be picking out my own ring, to be honest I think he would have been afraid to pick a ring for me… He once got me a promise ring when we were very young and he ended up realizing it was SO far from my taste that he felt bad that I wore it and loved it but really wouldn’t have ever picked it out for myself. He wants me to be in love with my bridal set and I am… Very much so! He had a say in every aspect of the diamond choosing and he actually turned down some lower clarity rocks I was ok with, he wanted something better… He’s the best and he did what he knew I would want, i am happy and he is happy… Also LOVES when people tell him “omg that ring is gorgeous!!! Good job!” BAHAHAHAHA!!! He loves the praise ❤️ Here is my old set and now my upgraded new set. Same style just a bigger and better stone and additional wedding band.

    ^^^^ old

    ^^^^ new


    Best of luck in choosing what you love and I’m sure you’ll get the ring of your dreams!!! He sounds like a man with your best interest at heart and that is something to be cherished, make sure to post a photo once you get it!!!!! Yay!!!

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