POLL: did your SO follow the '3 month rule' when buying your e-ring?

posted 8 months ago in Rings
  • poll: Did your SO spend 3 months income on your engagement ring?

    Yes, it was around that much

    No, it was less

    No, it was more

  • Post # 2
    679 posts
    Busy bee

    We spent way less than the 3 month rule. It was also less than a one week paycheck.

    Post # 3
    447 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: June 2019

    No, much less. Probably about a week’s worth. But for us it was largely dependent on what I wanted (simple and affordable) and with all our bills and costs of living, it still felt significant. With those costs, it probably did take him 2-3 months to save up!!

    Post # 5
    1047 posts
    Bumble bee

    Didn’t it used to be “two months??” 🤔 now it’s three? I’m old I guess haha.

    Post # 6
    2204 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: August 2018

    I guess it depends? For us, it depended on what type of ring and around what size diamond we wanted. In my mind, it can also depend on how the couple divides finances and how much the person(s) buying the ring makes (e.g. when my husband purchased my ering, our finances were still separate and since we were still finishing college, he ended up spending over 4 months of income but that’s how much it cost to buy the ring we wanted. On the flip side, I now make more than that in 1 month and had we been where we are now when we got engaged, we would probably only spend one person’s 1 month of income if that makes sense. I can’t fathom spending 3 month’s income on a ring now, but when we were making less, sure! 

    Post # 8
    1873 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: August 2019

    Absolutely not. At the time, it was around 1 month of his salary, but we bought the ring together. So ~2 weeks of our combined salaries.

    I would die if that much was spent on my ring. I mean, each to their own, but come on there are way better things to spend your money on.

    Post # 9
    1838 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: October 2020

    Mine spent closer to 1/3 of a month’s salary, lol. Get that ring insured!

    I find the 2 month rule to be insane. Many Americans are 2 paychecks away from poverty

    Post # 10
    2542 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: August 2019

    Nope! He had a family diamond reset into a new, nice but simple setting. I’m bad at math, but it’s somewhere in the realm of 3 days worth of work for him, ha. Had we not had a family stone to use, I would have wanted to hunt down a specific setting with a montana sapphire that would have been about 2 weeks worth of salary. 

    If he spent even one month worth of his salary, much less three, I’d have been upset. We love to travel, go to restaurants, and we enjoy our hobbies (running/races, wine, buying an obscene amount of books, video games, golf), so it would have meant having to cut back in other areas. 

    Post # 11
    1342 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: October 2018

    It was certainly not in our thought process when we were choosing my ring but your post got me thinking so I did some math.  To answer your question…no, my ring did not cost 3 months salary.  It was closer 6 weeks of his salary. 

    Post # 12
    432 posts
    Helper bee

    There is no point in our relationship in which 3 months salary would have been okay. When we were young and had little money, it would have been wildly irresponsible. Now that we are older, 3 months would be so extravagant that I would not feel comfortable wearing it, nor can I imagine wanting a stone of that size.

    3 months salary doesn’t seem like a great idea unless you also get a bonus that makes up a large % of your total compensation and isn’t included in the 3 months salary calculation or have money from other sources.

    Post # 13
    331 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: April 2022

    I think the 3mo rule was an ad and no one really followed it, and I don’t think most people want to carry 3mo salary on their finger, at least I’d be worried. 

    I liken it to pay only for what you want/need. Just because you get a promotion/pay raise does not mean you adjust all of your expenses (buying a more expensive car/home) to match. I feel thats how you fall into a paycheck to paycheck trap.

    he spent a little under a month salary equiv on mine

    Post # 14
    5 posts

     Ours was less! We’re saving up to buy a house so we decided to go with a moissanite to save money on the ring! 

    Post # 15
    12276 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: June 2011

    No way.  Maybe about half that at the time, or 6 weeks salary.  He went by what was a resonable number to him (based on disposable income and available savings), rather than how it compared to his salary.

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