POLL: did your SO follow the '3 month rule' when buying your e-ring?

posted 8 months ago in Rings
  • poll: Did your SO spend 3 months income on your engagement ring?

    Yes, it was around that much

    No, it was less

    No, it was more

  • Post # 16
    Member
    5966 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: June 2013

    We were in college so he had no income at the time. He did a co-op the previous semester which he had saved money from but even that was maybe one months pay? It was approximately one weeks pay of the starting salary for the job offer he had accepted at the time.

    I think that rule is silly. It should be what someone can comfortably afford.

    Post # 17
    Member
    717 posts
    Busy bee

    View original reply
    @gracefull:  absolutely not. That is a made up “rule” by marketing companies who’s only goal is to make you spend as much as possible. I would assume anyone who spent close to that amount is incredibly weathly and the salary is irrelevant and/or lives well below their means and has a ton of extra cash lying around month after month, which is totally possible, but not how most people live. 

    Spend what you can afford. I think you’ll find that the average person spends around one months salary, but there are so many other factors involved. 

    Post # 18
    Member
    2657 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: City, State

    It ended up being around that much coincidentally. He/we didn’t intentionally plan it that way, and he had never heard of it until after my ring was purchased. He spent what he felt comfortable with from a financial standpoint at the time. 

    Post # 19
    Member
    213 posts
    Helper bee

    Also way less, like even less than one month. He had saved money for it to pay for it outright and not wanting a loan.

    Post # 20
    Member
    1047 posts
    Bumble bee

    View original reply
    @elisabetn:  I completely agree!! Back then it was too expensive and irresponsible, and now it’s too much and over the top extravagant. Well said.

    Post # 21
    Member
    1462 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: September 2021 - Australia

    I think it was about six weeks salary, maybe slightly less for us. We earn a fairly decent salary, so I probably wouldn’t want to have anything much more expensive on my finger – certainly not 3 months worth.

    Post # 22
    Member
    1169 posts
    Bumble bee

    We haven’t bought mine yet, but we’ve been budgeting.

    I think we’re looking at just over 2 weeks gross salary, or 60% of his net income for the month.

    We’re still determining how to pay for it. He wants to pay entirely from his 2020 Christmas bonus that he set aside. I’d rather he paid off his credit card debt with the bonus and contribute half of the cost.

    I earn more, so about 20% of our combined gross income for a month.

    Post # 23
    Member
    790 posts
    Busy bee

    View original reply
    @gracefull:  ha! My wedding ring and engagement ring set was less than half of one paycheck. This rule is outdated. Get what you like!

    Post # 24
    Member
    4541 posts
    Honey bee

    Man, I should have told my H that was the rule!  I could have gotten a killer ring!

    but no, he didn’t even spend one month’s equivalent and that’s ok with me.  We came up with a reasonable budget and I was able to get the exact ring that I wanted.

    Post # 25
    Member
    226 posts
    Helper bee

    Is this salary rule supposed to refer to salary before or after taxes? Because for some peole, that’s almost half the amount.

    Post # 26
    Member
    2247 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: February 2014

    Three months? Heck nah! I would have had to kick him in the shin if he did that! It was about a month to 5 week’s of his salary but we basically paid for it together (he picked it all out himself, surprised me, etc. but we put it on a credit card for the points then paid it off with our combined account). We bought a house a few months later and also had to pay for our entire wedding ourselves so I didn’t want to go overboard. 8.5 years later my ring is still perfect to me. 

    Post # 27
    Member
    3529 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: March 2017

    No way. Mine was less than 1 week of pay. I would not want him to spend 3 months salary. We love to go on trips so that’s where we like to spend on money. 

    Post # 28
    Member
    751 posts
    Busy bee

    God no. Mine came in at less than $800.

    Post # 29
    Member
    8370 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper

    You guys, there is no three month rule. Can we please stop talking about it like it’s real? Here is the true story: Way back in the mid 20th century, the De Beers diamond cartel had a meeting to come up with ideas for increasing profits. Someone said “what if we convince people that men are supposed to spend a month’s salary on engagement rings?” They tried it and because people are dumb, IT WORKED. A few decades later, they wanted to double their profits, so they started putting out advertisments casually mentioning TWO months salary as if that was normal and just expected. What do you know, people suddenly started thinking that men were SUPPOSED to spend two months salary on a freaking ring. Now out of nowhere, I’m suddenly seeing 3 months. I don’t even think this is coming from the diamond companies. I think this is just random internet people going OTT as usual. Stop the insanity. 

    Post # 30
    Member
    704 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: June 2013

    3mo salary is also what my DH knew as rules back then. It’s marketing plot that are widely spread and believed, so it’s not that insane that your Fiance believe it too.

    We spent from what we want vs what we comfortable to pay, which is about 2mo. 

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