POLL: did your SO follow the '3 month rule' when buying your e-ring?

posted 8 months ago in Rings
  • poll: Did your SO spend 3 months income on your engagement ring?

    Yes, it was around that much

    No, it was less

    No, it was more

  • Post # 46
    Member
    4873 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: November 1999

    View original reply
    @gracefull:  Nope, my ring cost less than a weeks salary.  The three month salary ‘rule’ would have equaled a whole years minimum payment towards our mortgage on our first house. Cool to those who can and are willing to drop that kind of money on a ring but for us personally that wasn’t even a thought process. We are financially set up now but I’d still never drop that kind of cash on a piece of jewelry. I don’t see the value in the hours of labour to make it nor in the materials used. 

    Post # 47
    Member
    28 posts
    Newbee
    • Wedding: May 2021 - Las Vegas

    I don’t think the three month is ever a standard.  I have heard of saving two months for a ring. He was in a position to get a larger diamond and did so.   We are older and established.  He went with a 4 Carat  round center with 1 1/3 carat mounting.  It was definitely less than 3 or even two months salary.  

    Post # 48
    Member
    1936 posts
    Buzzing bee

    View original reply
    @minnewanka:  I’m guessing gross since the whole idea is obviously based on making maximum money for them!!!

    Post # 49
    Member
    1465 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: October 2016

    Ours was an heirloom so we didn’t pay for it, but I wouldn’t have been cool with him spending 3 months salary on a ring. That seems like SO MUCH. Saving for a house was way more important.

    Post # 50
    Member
    5521 posts
    Bee Keeper

    View original reply
    @gracefull:  mine was less than a month’s salary before tax, about 5 weeks after tax. 3 months for me would be insane; we are saving for a wedding and also to move. That and the ring and specs I wanted cost what they did; I wouldn’t have got a ‘better’ ring/ring I liked more by spending more (it’s about the biggest I can go without it being too big for my finger; it’s the colour I wanted (K) and is VVS1 clarity. Also amazing performance and no bow tie, took ages to find!).

    Post # 51
    Member
    1465 posts
    Bumble bee

    He bought a diamond ring that was about 1 month of his pay, we paid for our own wedding, and then we bought a starter home not long after we married. But we were early 20s, still students, and not from money.

    As it was, I was surprised that he spent so much.  I had suggested he buy a ring a fraction of the cost since I like jewelry but not as much as I like other things that cost money.  Even though he’s now making triple what he did then I’d still go for the same ring. 

     

    Post # 52
    Member
    855 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: August 2014

    No, and I wouldn’t have wanted him to!  He spent less than 1 month of his salary on it.

    Post # 53
    Member
    1627 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: July 2012

    My original ring was more like a week’s worth of pay.  

    Subsequent upgrades have been 1-2 weeks combined pay. 

    Our 10 year anniversary ring will probably be around the 1-1.5 months of income. 

    Post # 54
    Member
    1627 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: July 2012

    Also, when did people start using 3 months salary as the benchmark? I grew up hearing 2 months? 

    Post # 55
    Member
    27 posts
    Newbee

    Nope. I spent a fraction under £7k/$10k. I’ve always set that arbitrary amount as the most I’m willing to spend. It’s more of a principle thing. I live in London and want to use my money on a house. As a self employed contractor my 3 months salary would allow me to spend a lot more, I just wouldn’t feel right.

     

    PS these are my own opinions. No judgement on anyone that sticks to 3 months. It’s your money so you should do with it as you see fit.

    Post # 56
    Member
    1680 posts
    Bumble bee

    I thought the tradition was two months? My hubby spent about that, but he had it in savings etc already. xo

    Post # 57
    Member
    6296 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: September 2012

    No. He had a size range in mind, and did the research to see how much a stone of the size/cut/clarity would cost, and set the budget accordingly. Doing the math it ends up being about 2 months of his full salary, but he’s a bit of a higher earner so while my ring is of average size it wasn’t as huge a hit to his salary. The rule is stupid…couples should spend what they can afford and want.

    Post # 58
    Member
    1197 posts
    Bumble bee

    That “rule” was invented by diamond company’s for commercials to get people to buy more. It’s not a rule it’s an advertising ploy (so heck no– I don’t believe in being that manipulated)

    Post # 59
    Member
    826 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: September 2015

    View original reply
    @greeneyedbee:  inflation lol

    Post # 60
    Member
    2405 posts
    Buzzing bee

    We got engaged in the mid 90s and spent about $200 getting his late grandmother’s diamond reset in a simple white gold setting. At the time he was making about $18k year but no way could we have justified spending 3 mos salary; we were living paycheck to paycheck. 

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