Post # 46
We usually celebrate Christmas with DH’s family on the 20th since it’s also his father’s birthday. This year, we’re celebrating Christmas on the 26th with my family b/c my husband is a nurse and works Christmas Day.
Post # 47
I never understood why some people make such a fuss over celebrating things. My family is very flexible on dates, because 3 of the 4 of us are grown and have jobs with different schedules and my husband is military which gives us a whole different type of scheduling issues. For instance, this year he will work on Christmas and New years, so we were able to go home for one day for Thanksgiving, and it worked out that we were all there, so that’s when we did Chrismas. We did it in October a few years ago because my husband was being deployed and would miss two Christmases in a row. I don’t think it matters when you do presents. To me the overwhelming feeling of love and family is what the holidays are about anyways, so if you can have that multiple times, I say go for it!!
Post # 48
BeachBee1988: Where’s the “other” option?
Christmas Day is best. Christmas Eve and the 26th are good visits – sort of worth half points. Less points still for a day further from the 25th.
If there is a large distance to travel, the only good way I know is to alternate between years. One year Mother-In-Law gets first prize (Christmas Day), then next year she gets the consolation prize (the 26th or 24th).
Post # 49
Unfortunately, my Mother-In-Law also seems to think Christmas=Christmas Day plus church on Christmas Eve.
We’re not quite as limited geographically as you are but if we tried to please everyone we would be hitting four places between Christmas Eve night and Christmas day with about an hour and a half of travel between a few of the places. Two years ago we decided we would go to one place per day and we would alternate every year. Mother-In-Law still isn’t happy but we’re a lot less stressed and actually get to enjoy family time.
I’m glad it sounds like your Darling Husband is putting his foot down about it!
Post # 50
My mom used to be like your Mother-In-Law and if we didn’t get together on the 25th then Christmas just wasn’t the same.
Fortunately, she’s lightened up over the years. My dad is a doctor and somehow always got out of working Christmas day. But my sister and Brother-In-Law are also doctors and haven’t been so lucky, so my mom learned very quickly she better be quiet and she would see everyone when it was possible. Most of the time it is on the 25th, but one year we did get together the weekend prior and it was just as fun. Now that other families are involved, she realizes everyone wants to see their families and has been much more accommodating.
I don’t think it has to be on the actual day to be meaningful.
Post # 51
BeachBee1988: lol! Aww, thanks! I’m just saying a little wilful ignorance in that conversation may shut her up! It’s super duper generous to offer 26-31st and if she can’t see that, she’s not very nice. If I had a relative be that ungrateful, I would definitely take back a day or two of vacation time…
Post # 52
For me then the Christmas holiday season is largely based on the academic calender… so from around the 18th/19th of December up to Epiphany (although we only celebrate 12 days of Christmas in our household, as those are the religious dates). I only start gearing up for it after the kids break up from school, otherwise I also get ” ’tis the season of greed and consumption” overload.
I would say that Christmas (or, to be more accurate, Christmas season) visiting starts on the 23rd at the earliest, for me, and goes on until around the 2nd of January.
I also think OP’s Mother-In-Law needs a reality check if she’s throwing a hissy fit about one day… she’s just going to have to get over it!
Post # 53
- Wedding: August 2017 - Bahamas
FIs (maternal) family (grandparents, aunt, uncle and cousins) do Christmas whenever all of our schedules are free. This year, it’s the weekend prior to Christmas. Then, we will get together with his dad on another day or maybe the same day if timing works out.
My family is crazy and does three days of Christmas 24,25,26 — stemming from my grandparents divorcing after 60 years of holiday tradition but the kids still wanted each of them to get their own Christmas celebration.
What “counts” as a Christmas visit is that you show up…in the Christmas spirit and be joyous and celebrate with those you love! She needs to get over herself In My Humble Opinion.
Post # 54
I would vote the week surrounding Christmas. If it’s toooo early it seems like a Thanksgiving holdover. If it’s too late into January im just DONE. But a day or 2 off is no big deal at all.
Post # 55
9 hours apart and the day after Christmas doesn’t count? Jeez. And I thought my family had a hard time sharing holidays lol.
My family and FI’s family are on opposite coasts. We will be at my mom’s from the 18th – 28th. We will do a Christmas visit with FI’s dad and brother at some point after we get back. We did Thanksgiving day with his brother so that was the trade-off. Everyone understands.
Post # 56
In my country (the Netherlands), we have 2 Christmas days. So, naturally, we visit one family on the 25th and the other family on the 26th. I’d say from the 24th – 26th counts!