MemberOk so this might be regional, but where I’m from, guests do not get thank you cards just for attending someone’s wedding. I know we have Bees from all over the U.S., Canada, Europe and the world on here, so I want to settle the debate:
Do guests get thank you cards for just coming to the wedding if they don’t bring a gift?
MemberIn my experience, yes you must thank everyone that came to the wedding formally. It is polite and since they are your loved ones and friends it shouldn’t be weird or a problem. But then, I know this differs even in the same region.
MemberWhile most of our guests brought at the least a card, we still sent out thank-you’s if they signed the guest book. Some couldn’t make it to the reception, and I still wanted to thank them for attending the ceremony!
Memberinteresting! i’m surprised the poll is going the way it is so far. glad i made this post. i’ve seen mostly “no guests that don’t bring gifts don’t get thank you’s” on the Bee, so i’m hoping we can get a good round number of votes so i know if i need to plan to do this. haha!
Member@TwoStatesBride: I have always understood that a thank you card is sent to thank someone for a gift and that sending a thank you card to someone who didn’t send a gift is the paramount of rudeness because it points out that you noticed they didn’t send a gift. We are fixing the issue by sending Christmas/thank you cards. Christmas greetings only go to people whom did not bring gifts. Christmas greetings with thanks for the gift to those that did bring a gift.
Member@TwoStatesBride: Nope, because the reception is your way of thanking them for coming to the ceremony. If they get a gift then that gets a thank you card.
Memberno. why would i thank you just for coming? i invited you, you came. you should thank me for the dinner, drinks and partying; and then i’ll thank you for thanking me
Member@beachbride1216: THIS is what i thought. “oh thanks so much for sharing in our special day!” if i was a bum and didnt bring a gift to the wedding i would definitely give that the side-eye.
and i thought the reception was a place for the guests to ‘receive’ the bride and groom as a newly married couple for the first time. the definition of reception is a place for receiving, is it not? i never considered it as their thank-you for attending.
i plan to verbally thank everyone at the wedding for coming during our walk around the room during dinner, so i figured THAT is their thank you. i hadn’t planned on sending physical thank you cards to those who come without a gift, but we’ll see what le poll says!
Memberto me, just coming to my wedding was a gift in itself, so i sent thank you’s to everyone who came.
MemberMember@lillyhere: I disagree. you threw the party to celebrate your wedding and Iwent because you asked me too. the least you can do is feed me!
Member@TwoStatesBride: 🙂
@bebero: right. and I fed and entertained you. if you want to send me a gift, go ahead and I will thank you for it. if you don’t send me anything, neither will I because at this point we are pretty even, no?
not being snarky at ya, just following the logic.
Member@bebero: Well the idea is, hopefully, you went because you wanted to celebrate – not just because you were asked.
MemberWe are definitely thankiing everyone who attends. I can’t imagine not thanking folks who took time out, got dressed up to come and celebrate with me and here I am not sending them a thank you card. It’s not THAT expensive and it will go a long way in showing appreciation.
Member@lillyhere: Woah, I do feel like me providing a place for friends to gather and enjoy a night of drinking dancing and fun is a way of thanking them for making my day special but I wouldn’t go this far. I intend to visit with every person to thank them for coming, verbally.
What you’ve said borders on entitlement!
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