Post # 1
My husband and I made it clear on our first date that we were looking for our future spouse. It wasn’t like, “I’m in love with you and I want to marry you.” We just didn’t want to waste our time on someone who had different relationship goals. Saying “I love you” didn’t come until around 5 or 6 months, and we got married after almost 3 years of dating.
It just blows me away when I hear some girls on here who consider themselves “waiting,” but they have no idea if their SO even wants to get married, and they seem terrified of communication. I’m not saying that’s all of the “waiting” Bees, but I’ve noticed it several times.
Did anyone else have this talk early in their relationship?
Post # 2
Yup… we actually had that conversation before our first date. We met online and I asked him on our first phone call if he wanted to get married again. He’s been divorced twice so I would understand if the answer was no, but I knew I didn’t want to even go on a date with anyone who wasn’t looking for a serious relationship leading to marriage. LOL. He wasn’t freaked out by the question at all.
Here we are 2 years later about to get married 🙂
Post # 3
I think from the very beginning (first date maybe) that he wouldn’t get married or have (more) kids so if that was something I wanted I needed to move along.
Post # 4
I asked my SO what his goals were regarding our relationship before we even made our relationship official. I told him I was done dating casually and only wanted to date someone who could see a long-term relationship with me. So we had the marriage talk very early on. Neither of us wanted to enter into a serious relationship without at least pondering the possibility of marriage.
Post # 5
Like jonandjessgetwed said, I talked with my Fiance about it before we even met in person. We met online and I wasn’t looking for anything but a serious relationship. After we discussed that we both were looking for marriage and wanted to settle down we went on our first date and got engaged 9 months later.
Post # 6
From the very beginning… I always make t my business to know what a man’s thoughts on marriage is.
Post # 7
Fiance and I talked about it a few weeks in when he mentioned he would be ok living common law but would get married again without a big shin dig. I told him I wanted to be married but didn’t need the whole big wedding again. I reminded him how young he was and that if he was with a woman who had never been married she might want a big or ‘proper’ wedding.
He said well lucky for me you already had one… *swoon*
Post # 8
Like jonandjessgetwed: pinklove19:
both said- before our first date. We also met online. I did not want to be wasting mine or anyone’s time if we werent on the same page. I was just getting back into the dating world and was not looking for a husband at that moment but I wanted to make sure that whoever I was talking to was at least open to a forever thing.
Post # 9
whenever DH mentioned plans in the future, i always responded that i didn’t know if there would be enough time for that. DH reassured me there would be. i guess i wasn’t sure i was in it for the long haul. i was looking for a spouse but wasn’t sure if he was the one yet.
we went to our first wedding together after 7/8 months of dating and we talked about our hypothetical wedding. we got engaged a little after 2 years of dating and married 7 months later.
Post # 10
- Wedding: May 2016 - San Clemente Church, Italy
He was up front that he was looking for wife and I was up front that I was glad about that!
Post # 11
Only a few months in we mentioned we could imagine getting married and having a life together, the relationahip seemed right very early on. But it didn’t seriously get brought up until a year or two ago, we’ve been together 4 years now. I’m “waiting” sort of, we consider ourselves unofficialy engaged. I picked a ring, he’s buying it or already bought it he’s trying to be mysterious lol we’re very open about things so right now he’s just trying to surprise me with the official engagement
Post # 12
- Wedding: June 2015 - Holly Hedge Estate
We talked about it really early on, maybe not first date but really soon. He had been married before and he wasn’t in a hurry to get married but definitely wanted that in his future. Got engaged 4.5 years later and married 1.5 years after that.
Post # 13
We discussed probably about a month into dating. I asked him if he’d ever consider getting married again since we have both been divorced before. He was thrilled that I even asked and I was thrilled at his reponse.
Post # 14
We had talked about marriage and having kids in a general way early on (confirming that both of us were looking to be married/raise a family), but I think the first time we talked about OUR future together involving marriage was sometime after the 6 month mark. I remember fearfully bringing it up, asking him “do you see me as the person you could spend the rest of your life with/get married to?” and he said yes and I died. We got engaged like 6 months or so after that initial convo.
Post # 15
I voted 1 year or later. Fiance and I were only 17 when we started dating. We moved in together a little after a year, and then got engaged a year and half later, and agreed we’d have a long engagement after we got a little more independent. Now after a little over 3 years of being engaged we’ll be married in a month! 🙂