(Closed) Poll: Who should I bring with me dress shopping?

posted 6 years ago in Dress
  • poll: Who should I bring with me when I go dress shopping?
    The whole crew: Aunt, stepmom, MIL, SIL, and friend : (13 votes)
    22 %
    The whole crew, but I should go alone first so I know what I like : (10 votes)
    17 %
    Leave the crew at home-- just bring a friend : (37 votes)
    62 %
  • Post # 3
    1152 posts
    Bumble bee

    I’d advise going just with a friend first. Then if you decide, or if you have a few to decide between, bring the whole crew to see it before you pull the trigger. It’s a lot of pressure to a) please everyone with your dress, and b) keep everyone happy while you’re trying on dresses for hours. 

    Post # 4
    2712 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: September 2012

    I think you should do both.  Invite the whole crew with you to try on dresses and do some solo shopping.  I did a some shopping with the whole crew (mom, Future Mother-In-Law, 2 BMs, and both of my grandmothers) and it was a lot of fun.  They were happy I invited them.

    I also did a few trip with just 2-3 of my BMs and one solo trip.  I definitely recommend at least one solo trip because it allows you to clear your head and focus on what you want.  You don’t have to worry about pleasing anyone else or let their opinions confuse or sway you.

    ETA: You can also book a bunch of appointments, let your family know when and where they are and invite them to come to whatever they feel like.  That way they can choose how much time they spend dress shopping with you and gives them an easy out if they don’t want to spend the whole day shopping.

    Post # 5
    4193 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: July 2012 - Baltimore Museum of Industry

    I went dress shopping with just one of my MOH- I think if you have more than 2 or 3 opinions, it’s too much. Just start shopping with your friend instead.

    Post # 6
    3886 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: September 2011

    I think you should plan another “getting to know you” type event— maybe all go for mani/pedi’s together— and go dress shopping with just one other person. Can be your stepmom, your MoH, a friend who’s not in the wedding party, or your fiance. Really anyone, as long as you trust their opinion and feel comfortable being half-naked in front of them. Dress shopping can be an overwhelming experience, and is pretty emotional (not the weepy kind, hopefully) and the more people you get in the mix, the more overwhelming it becomes for you.

    Post # 7
    77 posts
    Worker bee
    • Wedding: July 2012

    I would suggest you just go with a close friend/ family member.  The big groups never seem to work out- someone hates it, someone loves it- just too many opinions to have fun.  

    The dates you have listed might not be real, but if they are, I would strongly suggest you go more than 5 months out.  Many dresses take 6 months to come in and you have to give yourself some time to get alterations.

    Post # 8
    10453 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: February 2014

    I actually really liked shopping alone. Just me and the consultant to narrow down my likes, and then I bring my family after. 

    Post # 9
    11167 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper

    @RunsWithBears:  I agree.

    For my first couple of trips out I took a larger group, mainly for the experience. However, as it became time for me to finally choose I ended up just taking my aunt and best friend to narrow down the field. In the end I purchased my dress when I was alone, yep alone! I needed to hear my own thoughts without anyone else influencing me.

    Post # 10
    776 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: May 2013

    I think you should do a little of both.  I actually think bringing them all along would be a good ice breaker in meeting each other.  They are there on common ground, and have something to discuss while you’re in the dressing room.  🙂

    BUT, I would only do that once.  Too many people and their opinions tends to be stressful.  At least to me.  Each time I went I only took one person. (I don’t have a big family to take along) But even only taking one at a time, I ended up letting their opinions sway me.  Finally after about 160 dresses (excessive, I know)  I ended up making my mind up on a trip I made all by myself without telling anyone, and decided not to care what any of them thought.  🙂 

    Good luck and have fun! 

    Post # 11
    1668 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: March 2012

    The fewer the better.  I found my dress when I was shopping alone.  I did the whole mom and sisters thing.  It was fun and memorable but it was overwhelming.  There are a lot of opinions and you start to lose focus on your own voice.  Plus, they got tired (we did 3 stores because I came from OOT) and I was annoyed by that. 

    Post # 12
    289 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: April 2013

    I went first with my Mom and Future Mother-In-Law, the second (and last) time I went with my Mom and Aunt. When I brought my FSILs and MOH in to look at BM dresses  – they immediately went “eh” when they saw my dress on the rack, then I overheard them talking about how simple it was and how they’d never wear something like it – I almost cried. When I tried it on though, they totally changed their tune and loved it – but honestly? If they would’ve all went with me originally they probably would’ve talked me out of trying it on in the first place.

    Anyway, point: I wouldn’t bring a whole crew. At the end of the day I was glad I went with only a couple people at a time. Too many opinions can make you second guess a dress that you otherwise would love.

    Post # 13
    46 posts
    • Wedding: December 2012

    Bring the whole crew for fun for the first time.

    There are some people who, being with you to try on a few dresses, it will mean the world to them.

    Then, for the second time, if needed, bring a small portion of people who will really be honest, but also know you well enough to know when you say “this is the dress” that it is your dress.

    My first time I got all dolled up/makeup/hair and had my mom and 3 bridesmaids-the 3 maids all started crying over one of the dresses I tried on…….I was not feeling it at all, but was confused because I thought maybe I was missing the moment.

    The second time I had just had a brutal day at school/no makeup/horrible bun on my head/felt gross and I brought my Mom and Maid/Matron of Honor. They let me talk out how I felt in each dress. I was not overwhelmned and I actually found my dress when I least expected it.

    Post # 14
    2086 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: June 2012 - Pippin Hill Farm & Vineyards

    When I shopped with friends, I think I tried on 6 dresses in an hour. I had prance out to the mirror for all to see, even when I knew I didn’t like the dress.

    I went alone from then on. I usually got through 10-12 dresses in an hour when I worked with a consultant alone.

    Post # 16
    1664 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: August 2012

    I brought my mom, sister and dad. they were honest, but kind….and it was nice not to have a million different opinions being thrown in my direction. I took a few other people to my next appointments after I had already chosen my dress… that way they couldn’t say much if they didn’t like it! 

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