(Closed) Polyamory?

posted 7 years ago in Relationships
Post # 3
Member
949 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

I have to say, from what I’ve seen, polyamory in no way eliminates jealousy. Several friends of mine have had or are currently in open relationships and open marriages, and my impression is that while being in a polyamorous relationship teaches people a lot about how to handle jealousy, it definitely doesn’t get rid of it.

Like you said, I don’t really think I’m wired to deal with that way of living myself. My upbringing wasn’t all that restrictive, but I just don’t find myself attracted to anyone else when I’m in a serious relationship. But I do think there’s a lot of value in it for people who choose open relationships.

Post # 4
Member
7587 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: December 2010

I actually did 2 years of research on cults while I was getting my degree.  In my research I looked at all types of lifestyles that others may have viewed as “cult like” even if they were not traditional cults.  A few of the societies I exposed myself too, believed in polyamory or polygamy.  I can say that I still saw many cases of jeaoulsy among those that viewed themselves as being in polyamorous relationships. However, there were very few instances of this in poligamist households.  I always wondered if the fact that the poligamists I was with, believed they were following their religious paths.  While the ployamorous lifestyle was not based in god or any higher power belief but just based in choice. Was what made the women involved in these relationships act differently.

 

Post # 7
Member
3364 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: December 2011

Has anyone seen the HBO special? It looks like an older documentary but I was so intrigued!! Of course the people looked like Hippies, so of course there is always that negative association!

Would you mind sharing the title and author?

Post # 9
Member
3364 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: December 2011

@SoupyCat: I love the smell of an old book! =) Going to have to look for it! Im still so intrigued! THANK YOU!

Post # 10
Member
3148 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

I don’t know, it sounds like a lot of work to me : )

All kidding aside, I know I was not built like that as well.  I would never feel completely fufilled in love. When I think about your subject line, all I can think is how lucky I am to have a strong love and bond with Fiance. I’m sure people are capable of it, but I have to admit — it sounds very exhausting and almost like you are really living your world day by day in your large family.  I love the fact that Fiance and I  can take off whenever we want, where ever we want to go, spend money the 2 of us agreed upon, work on goals together. 

Post # 13
Member
7587 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: December 2010

@SoupyCat: The majority of them were one man. However, there was one that was a women as the head with 3 other men and there was a lesbian relationship as well.

Post # 14
Member
949 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

@SoupyCat: Well, I guess I should more fairly say that maybe they deal with jealously better, but it still crops up, especially if someone doesn’t follow whatever guidelines are in place for the relationship. And I remember Stranger in a Strange Land blowing my mind on several levels a few years back, I should re-read it. Heinlein is fascinating, especially when I’m in a mood where I can ignore his most misogynistic moments.

Post # 16
Member
2154 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

I think (or I’d like to think) that ideas about polyamory and sexuality have evolved a lot since Heinlein wrote his novel back in 1961. It wasn’t even really the sixties yet, you know?

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