Positive experiences with children and wide age gaps? (infertility woes)

posted 1 week ago in TTC
Post # 16
1825 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2015

I was 8 and my brother was 6 when my youngest brother was born.  We sort of treated him like a “baby” during our childhood, as in, we liked to help out with him by reading him books and trying to teach him new skills.  We became very close on a “peer” level when he was in high school and the other two of us were in our 20s.  We are super close now and don’t recognize the age gap.  Actually, his fiancee and my husband are both the same age, since he dated someone a little older, and I dated someone a little younger.  He lives in a different state, but we still get together fairly often.

Post # 17
899 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: January 2019

My brother and I are 6 years apart. We rarely fought and weren’t close as kids, but as adults we get along great. I think us being not that close has a lot more to do with our dramatically different personalities than our age. I think if we had been closer in age it would have been very volatile.

My husband and brother in law are 8 years apart (middle sibling passed away when the youngest was only 2) and they’ve had a frustrated relationship. They get along well now that the youngest is over 20, but man those teenage years when we were in our twenty were awful. But again, so much of that is just their personalities, they are SO different.


regardless of age gap you can’t predict their closeness, don’t stress yourself about this!

Post # 18
4824 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: January 2017

My father and my uncle are 9 years apart and you’d never know it now. They’re best friends.

Post # 19
59 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: June 2018

My sister and I are 7 years apart and we are pretty much best friends. Growing up I loved “helping out” with her whenever I could. Although the age gap seemed a lot larger when we were younger, it was still fun growing up together. My hubby and his sister are 12 years apart and they are close as well! 🙂 Good luck with everything! 

Post # 20
769 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: April 2011

Not much help since mine are 2 years apart BUT my husband and his sister are 7 years apart and MUCH closer than my brother and I who are 2.5 years apart.  That wasn’t the case growing up so much, but as we became adults my brother and I hardly speak unless it’s at a holiday gathering and Darling Husband and his sister talk/see each other often 

Post # 21
1747 posts
Bumble bee

My SS (9yo) and DS (18mo) are 8 years apart and thick as thieves. My DS lights up around my SS. They do everything together. He was also a huge help in the early years when I needed to grocery shop. He could push DS in one cart while I shopped in the other, and he’s soothed him in car rides when I can’t reach/stop. I’ve walked in to find him reading him stories while I’m getting ready in the morning, and wherever my SS is, I know DS isn’t too far behind. 

I was very worried about the age gap, and it was trying for the first 9 weeks while he adjusted to not being the only child on our weeks anymore (he has a 4yo brother at his mom’s), but he has turned into an invaluable helper (by his choice). I worry when he gets older and closer to his teen years, but for now it has been a blessing. I know not everyone’s experience will be the same, and I am grateful for our positive experience. 

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