(Closed) Possible Divorce, Really Could Use Advice

posted 4 years ago in Married Life
Post # 46
1284 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2022 - Maui

If you have a place to go I recommend separating and doing counseling either together and/or individually. SO are loved and welcomed in our family too, so this is not normal or healthy to be this toxic. I say, get some space and feel things out for a couple months.

Post # 47
216 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2017

If this is really all there is to it and you’re not missing any huge part of the story, I definitely agree with PP that this is a very unhealthy relationship. I think there’s an underlying reason that cause this and is known only by him. You shouldnt be walking on eggshells around your husband! He should see you as a partner. He is manipulating you by using “leaving” as a threat everytime you tell him how you feel. And i’m talking about a very solid “please remove your ex name from the house n bank account”! This is definitely a dealbreaker for me. And from my experience, a guy who uses “you want to keep me away from my friends and family/you’re too possessive/youre clingy” excessively with no solid reason, is usually saying that to cover something bigger that he’s hiding.

ETA: sorry got a bit carried away. Forgot to write a suggestion. I think you both should go to a therapy and see the result before making any major decision.

Post # 48
6954 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: April 2016

Honestly this relationship sounds like a toxic shitshow. I’d be done with all his bullshit (though I doubt I would’ve let it get to the point of marriage in the first place). He wants a separation? GOOD! Bye bye loser!

Post # 49
3108 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2017

View original reply
mbrinzo :  WTF?!? Do you realize that with his ex being on all of the accounts and his house, that she is more of his wife than YOU are. Ummm, no. I’m angry for you – sign the damn divorce papers and move on. He’s a POS.

And I hope you know that I’m not trying to hurt your feelings in any way but YOU are his wife. His mother, his sister, and his ex come AFTER you. He’s supposed to protect and defend you, and put your needs first. He’s not a husband. He’s a joke.

Post # 50
137 posts
Blushing bee

I have also been in a relationship where the SOs family did not like me. And yes… for NO reason. It all started with him inviting me to a family event for the first, and everyone in the house ignoring my presence. So WEIRD. He was also a TOOL for not introducing me to these folks but now I could careless because they are not people I missed out on! :]

I could go on how rude and disrespectful they were, but I am GLAD it did not work out. 

As for exes family… I never understand why those type of people cannot get a life. 

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