Possible Job Offer + TTC – Advice?

posted 2 years ago in Career
  • poll: If offered the position, how much should I share about our plans to TTC?
    Do not share any plans, or ask about the maternity policy : (5 votes)
    28 %
    Do not share any plans, but ask about the maternity policy so you are aware : (13 votes)
    72 %
    Share your plans to TTC with HR and ask about the maternity policy : (0 votes)
    Share your plans to TTC with HR AND your future boss, and ask about the maternity policy : (0 votes)
  • Post # 2
    Member
    9940 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper
    • Wedding: City, State

    Following!

    Post # 3
    Member
    954 posts
    Busy bee

    Wait until you actually receive the job offer and then inquire about all benefits.  If the company is large enough, they will probably provide benefits material with your offer letter and then you can ask followup questions to HR if you need more details. Asking more questions before you get an offer is a reason for them to pass on you, even if it’s not supposed to be one. 

     

    I wish you luck with TTC but my first (of 3) HSG’s was back in 2014 and I am just now pregnant with our first after IVF #2.  

    Post # 4
    Member
    88 posts
    Worker bee
    • Wedding: October 2016

    Following also…. i want to change jobs but am TTC and worried abt needing 12 mos before fmla kicks in. 

    Post # 5
    Member
    105 posts
    Blushing bee

    Make sure that the company has 50 employees within a 75 mile radius. FMLA is null & void if the company is small or a satellite office. 

    I would not ask or talk about your mat leave specifically until you are offered the job. Even then, focus on benefits in general and not specifically mat leave. It’s just…. not the way you want to start off w an employer unfortunately. 

     

    Good luck.

    Post # 6
    Member
    2844 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: July 2011

    I changed jobs twice while TTC (2.5 years of trying) actually got pregnant the month after I qualified for the enhanced maternity pay (result) 

    i would keep the plans to yourself but ask about all benefits not just maternity. I’m not sure but in the UK all HR policies have to be easily accessible to employees and most are on an intranet where you don’t need to ask for them. 

    Not sure how it works in the US but here you are eligible for the 52 weeks leave from day 1, it’s just the pay that is different 

    Post # 7
    Member
    9493 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper
    • Wedding: August 2012

    I would not share any plans at all. If you want to find out about maternity leave, ask for information about all of their benefits, not just that specific one.

    I would just keep in mind that they don’t have to hold your job for you at all if you’re not covered by FMLA.

    Post # 8
    Member
    1223 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: October 2016

    I wouldn’t say anything about the fact that you are TTC. I would be open about asking about the maternity leave policy.  I’m torn as to whether you should ask about what the policy would be if you had been there less than a year.  Obviously that pretty much gives away that you are actively TTC.  

    Does the company have any reputation for being particularly family-friendly?  Are there any interesting reviews on glassdoor?  Is this a “lifetime” job or is this a job in another high-turnover industry/position?

    Post # 9
    Member
    680 posts
    Busy bee

    Don’t say anything. Once you have an offer letter, if the full benefits package isn’t fully described, you can ask. If you end up signing the offer and moving forward, start by reviewing the employee manual or talking with someone in HR about their maternity policy. Once you are pregnant, do you research and know what you are entitled to. Often times you can negotiate!

    Post # 11
    Member
    1552 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: November 2017

    Do not ask about these things until you have an offer in hand. Seriously. As a woman who is of a certain age, hiring managers already make all sorts of assumptions about your life plans / choices, what kind of time you could potentially need off for such life changes. If you’re advancing through the process – just leave well enough alone. Once you get an offer, ask the recruiter / HR rep about maternity leave.

    At 23, I was actually advised by a recruiter that managers would be opposed to hiring me because I was at that marrying and getting pregnant age. There was one specific job where I was replacing someone’s right hand woman because she was leaving to have a baby and start a family. I was so hungry at the time, I went along with it and selling that I’m not just going to ditch this dude to live my life *insert eyeroll here.* I’m now going through a job search as a 30 year old bride to be and have questioned whether or not I should wear my engagement ring to interviews based on these experiences when I was younger. I decided “screw it,” because if an employer was going to disqualify me for that – I didn’t want the work/life balance they were offering anyways. However, I made no references to it and ultimately have been judged on my experience and merit. I’m currently in negotiations about a position I am so excited about with a group of people who couldn’t be lovelier. My recruiter was well aware of my vacation needs / upcoming wedding, and once the offer came through immediately negotiated that for me.

    TTC is a bit different though – based on your post, you are truly on a journey where there are alot of variables – ifs/whens that you just can’t answer. Do you really want to sacrifice your dream job (that honestly, by the sounds of it has been established to cater to someone with a family) for so many uncertainties? Most sane people understand these life changes happen, are about to happen, could happen. Etc. No need to call attention to it before an offer, because it just gives them the impression your mind isn’t on the job aspect.

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