- 6 years ago
- Wedding: August 2012
ok bees, i need your help or advise.
My Maid/Matron of Honor is my best friend, she is like a sister to me. All of my bridesmaid including my Maid/Matron of Honor live out of town and my closest bridesmaid lives at least a hour from me. I love them all and wanted them to be part of our big day.
I also wanted to make it as easy as possible for all of them. I never asked them to come dress shopping with me, I emailed them picture of dresses to see what they liked and ended up picking a dress that was on sale at nordstrom that didnt look like a typical bridesmaid dress. I didn’t want a bachlorette party and wanted a small and intimate bridal shower.
My Maid/Matron of Honor is the only one in by bridal party that has a baby. He is 26 months old and she is a stay at home mom. He is a handful and I totally understand that she is always tired. She felt stressed planning my bridal shower cause she kept saying she didn’t have any time. I told her to email the other bridesmaid cause they would love to help her. My other friend who is not in the bridal party even reached out to her and offered to make the invites and help with the planning.
Now that it is 5 weeks to the wedding, she feels bad that she hasnt been there for me, which I never asked her to be. All I wanted her to do was be there for me the weekend of my wedding. She feels bad and now wants to step down because she feels like she has been a horrible Maid/Matron of Honor. I never said that to her, and that I totally understand because of her baby she is always busy.
Her plan has always been that on Thursday before the wedding, she and her husband would drive to her Mother-In-Law house and Friday morning Bridesmaid J would drive her up to me. Friday we would get our nails done and have the rehearsal and dinner and Fiance booked us a room at the ritz for all the girls to spend the night. On Saturday her husband was going to drive up (only one and half hours away) to join her to attend the wedding and they were going to drive back down early Sunday morning.
Now she doesnt know if leaving him with his own grandmother is a great idea, since now he crys all the time with she is not around and her Mother-In-Law is worried that weekend he wont stop crying. She has left him overnight with her before ( about a year ago) and he did cry for about 4 hours until he cried himself to sleep and that was the VERY LAST time she ever left him.
I wanted my wedding weekend to be a great time for her to relax and not think about the baby. For her to have fun and let loose. She has never done anything for herself ever since the baby has been born. She never has a girls night,. NOTHING! Now her Mother-In-Law wants to come up with the baby and get a hotel room by our wedding, so that if the baby wont stop crying, they are close by. I am fine with, as long as its not her going to check on the baby and its her husband, but I feel like if the baby is so close by, her mind the whole night would be on the baby and her husband would be no help.
What do you guys think??