- 7 years ago
- Wedding: June 2012
I became engaged seven months ago after dating my fiance for just over a year. When we began dating, my mom didn’t want to get to know him, because she claimed that she gets close to me and my brother’s significant others and then is sad when we break up. Therefore, my family didn’t know my fiance very well when we became engaged, although they already disapproved somewhat due to the fact that he’s six years younger than me (he was 24 and I was 30 when we got engaged).
Since becoming engaged, my family has become much more vocal about my relationship. They don’t think he’s right for me and they have no trouble expressing it. My mom, in particular, has become very emotional about the whole thing. The engagement started off on the wrong foot, since my fiance did not ask for my parents for their permission to propose to me. I also wasn’t too open with them about how serious our relationship was, so they felt completely blindsided by the engagement. My fiance obviously senses that my parents don’t care for our engagement and, though I know he tries, it’s very hard for him to be comfortable with my parents. I also feel like he doesn’t make things easier for us, knowing what I’m going through. The shortcomings that my mom points out are pretty much true (he’s somewhat lazy, rarely takes initiative to help around the house, lacks manners) and it’s getting very difficult to be stuck in the middle. His parents are thrilled with our engagement, so I don’t think he really understands how I feel.
Bottom line is, I’m having a very hard time planning this wedding without my parents support. They will pay for it, but what nothing to do with the actual planning and this hurts. I’m thinking of postponing the wedding until I come to terms with the reality of my situation (it is 11 months away). I’m having a hard time separating my feelings from everything that’s going on around me, and I was much happier before I became engaged. Any words of wisdom?
Thank you for letting me vent!