Post # 1
Is anyone providing a post-wedding brunch?
I was not really planning on it but my out-of-towners suggested we have a brunch and also picked the restaurant.
It wil cost around $50-60/head and I’m not really comfortable about paying for 15-20 people for that price, plus we didn’t select it.
However these guests are flying 7000~miles (from US/UK to Asia)
Should we stick with the suggested restaurant (guests are more interested in this one) and have everyone pay, or should I suggest a cheaper place and pay for it?
Also would like to check if you have gone to any destination wedding and paid for your own meal at post wedding brunch?
Post # 2
If they are just wanting to go to brunch the day after the wedding they should pay. My future Mother-In-Law wanted to host a brunch Sunday but we told her no. The last thing I want is another round of wedding events lol. Besides anyone we would have will be at the rehearsal dinner and wedding. No point
Post # 3
My assumption would be that if the guest has selected the restaurant and suggested the event, they’re paying. If that’s the agreement and you’re okay with that, I say let them pay and have it at the more expensive place.
In my mind, you’re the bride. It’s not your responsibility to host a post-wedding brunch, you’ve just hosted an expensive wedding! Also, we were absolutely bagged after our wedding and my Mother-In-Law wanted to host the brunch. Many people were hungover and it wasn’t as nice/enjoyable of an event as we would have liked and we were super tired and just wanted to go home.
I wouldn’t expect anything beyond the wedding if I was attending a destination wedding.
Post # 4
Yeah I would assume they’re paying.
Post # 5
Normally I would say they should pay unless you choose to host it. However, as they’re flying across the entire world to attend your wedding, I’d host as many nice events as possible over the weekend. In your case I’d pay for the brunch at the place the guests are excited about.
Post # 6
we’re doing a brunch and encouraging anyone that would like to join us to do so, but it’s not a hosted event.
Post # 7
I think that you should talk to the relatives about the plans and who is going to pay, then go from there. They may not be on the same page with the idea that if they pick the restaurant they pay.
Post # 8
I agree with keepingitreal8675309 :
They may not understand that whoever picks the restaurant/does the inviting usually pays. If they do expect you to pay, I would host it at a restaurant within your budget. I think it’s pretty bold of them to pick an expensive restaurant and want you to pay.
Do you even have to or want to go to this brunch? If it were me, I’d say “go have fun! I’ll see you later in the day”. The last thing I would want to do is go to brunch the day after my wedding.
Post # 9
Hi All, thanks for everyone’s response. I wanted to clarify this is JUST with my university friends or friends from out of town. NO RELATIVES will be attending. Also i do want to eat with them despite being hungover, since many will be flying out the next day or day after, so it would be one of the meals we would have together!
I mean i also wanted to check if the norm for guests to pay for brunch. I mean if it was like 20/head i would be fine but 50/head is really too much especially after all the wedding expenses =/
Post # 10
- Wedding: October 2019 - UK
I’m from the UK and if my friend said ‘oh lets all have brunch after the wedding to catch up before you guys leave’ I would expect that I was paying for my own food and drink. Just make sure you don’t send a invite that sounds to formal. I would send an e-mail like this:
We are really looking forward to seeing you all at our wedding. As a lot of you are leaving quite soon after we though it might be nice to all meet up for brunch the day after the wedding. Some have mention that they would like to try restaurant X and so we think this might be a good location for the meet-up. We will be at the restaurant at 11:30, please let me know if you are coming so I can reserve some tables, Prices there are around 50$ to 60$ per person.
Lots of love,
Post # 11
can you pick somewhere cheaper and pay?
Post # 12
I agree if they picked the place, they should pay. We had a post-wedding brunch but it was very low key and we hosted entirely. It was really just an opportunity to hang out with people who traveled to support us since we obviously didn’t have a huge opportunity to do so at the wedding itself.
It would be nice if you paid, but I think then you get to change the venue to something more suitable for your budget.