(Closed) Postage on the RSVP? Is it really important?

posted 4 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 2
9443 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2016

Not technically rude as RSVP cards aren’t required. However, putting on the postage will probably help ensure that more people send thier reply in. Basically, the easier you make it for people the more likely they are to do it. Personally, I would say it’s worth the money to avoid the headache of tracking people down…but then again there’s often complaints on here of people not RSVPing no matter how easy the couple made it so it’s really your call.

Post # 3
6331 posts
Bee Keeper

We didn’t put postage on the RSVP cards for cost reasons, but we also had web and email options for RSVP so that guests wouldn’t have to pay postage in those response settings. 

Post # 6
1465 posts
Bumble bee

You could send postage to the older people who you think will be turned off by rsvp’ing online. That is what we did.

I did not want to pay to give everybody a stamp so we just gave one to the people who we felt would be most inclined to mail it in. Everybody else rsvp’d through our website or in person or on the phone (and I’d just write down their meal choice on my spreadsheet). 

Post # 7
685 posts
Busy bee

I did an online rsvp so didn’t include a response card. I had to reach out to the majority of my guests to confirm if they would come.  Biggest pain, but I expected it from my crowd and from experience planning larger parties.  

The value really is that it will increase the number of responses you get. No stamp is just an added hurdle to putting that card in the mail. Why include response cards at all if they can reply online?  Save yourself the cost of those cards/envelopes.

Post # 8
1295 posts
Bumble bee

If you’re including the RSVP card w/ envelope, yes.  Know that if you don’t you’ll have a lot of people bitching behind your back.

It’s only $100, suck it up.

Post # 9
878 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2017

If you are doing the traditional send us back an rsvp through snail mail then yes, it’s only appropriate to put postage on it. If you include other options besides the snail mail like phone, email etc then I think it’s ok to not include postage because there are options. 

Post # 10
536 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2015

Also, not sure where you are, but for rsvp to cost $100 you must have a huge invite list.  In u.s. that would get 200 invites plus couples/families only need 1 so are you having a 300-400 person wedding?  If so, is $100 for postage really that much in the grand scheme?

Post # 11
3057 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: March 2017

If you want them to send them back, then postage is required. If you have a website then it is not needed. 

Post # 12
9869 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

You really should do whatever you can to make sending a response card back convenient, which means including a stamp.  Honestly, it wouldn’t cross my mind that a response card wouldn’t include postage, and there’a a small chance I’d drop it in the mail without adding my own stamp because it’s so common to already have one included.

Post # 13
7934 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2013

stamps are 49 cents.  so for it to cost you $100, that is 200 rsvp cards.  generally you invited couple.  so i will round maybe you are inviting some families and some singles.  it sounds like your wedding is 300+ people.  in the scheme of things is $100 really gonna make or break.

put a stamp on it, don’t be cheap.


Post # 14
378 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2017

I am planning to leave postage off for those that I know will rsvp online, but put it on for those who won’t – for example, a friend of mine who works as a computer programmer is getting no stamp, but my aunt who doesn’t own a smartphone and still has dial up Internet on her 15 year old computer is getting a stamp.

Post # 15
13549 posts
Honey Beekeeper

It is not rude. People are supposed to respond to an RSVP on their own, even without any self addressed, pre-stamped reply envelopes. The etiquette sticklers even claim that people should be offended to receive the latter since it implies you think they would be inconsiderate and incapable otherwise.

But people these days are so used to the crutch that there may be those who wrongly think you were “cheap” or improper.

The truth is, people who refuse to reply are likely to be rude either way. 

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