- 5 years ago
- Wedding: December 2012
I can’t believe I am writing this, but I can’t talk to anyone else about this siutation, and have gained much help from the wedding Bee boards in the planning process, and am confident you can help me arrive at a decision.
Here’s the situation, I will try to be as honest as possible:
My fiancee and I met 3 years ago, and got engaged in February. He has made me so happy, and took this noncommital girl to a place of almost-wedded bliss. A little background without too much personal info, my life is a bit unconventional (by choice), I’m an entertainer and consultant, travel a lot, and have attained my graduate degree in the past year. Needless to say, I haven’t had insurance in a decade, no retirement fund, little savings, and tend to live paycheck to paycheck, though never struggled nor accrued extensive debt, aside from student loans. This was my life when the FI and I first met, and little has changed since, aside from the student loans that I now have to pay. My parents aren’t rich, but have generously offered to pay for the amazing venue and are helping extensively, for which I am extremely grateful
Recently, my FI has expressed concern about my debt and paying for the wedding (vendors, ,etc) and my career path, which to me feels like a betrayal as he knew who I was when we met. He seems to be criticizing my choices, demanding a life plan, and I am starting to think has a serious case of cold feet. I am now doubttful as well, and dont really now what to do. I travel a lot for my job, and will do so until Novemeber, when the contract ends. I love my job and discussed it at length with him before I accepted it. Our wedding is set for the winter.
We are now contemplating postponing (canceling???) the wedding. The STD’s are sitting next to me in a box, ready to go in the mail, and my parents will surely lose their deposit if we choose to cancel. It has been so stressful planning the wedding, I thought it was supposed to the happiest time of my life, but I feel like all we do is fight, and I am planning a lot from the road, which adds to tensions between the FI and I.
Goodness this is long, I apologize! Just want anyone who would like post a response to have all the info, as I am in desperate need of help. Postpone? Cancel? Just cold feet? Has anyone else gone through this, and is it a red flag?
Thank you SO much for any help, I really appreciate it!