Post # 1
I’m sad but in a way relieved!
MrN & I have been toying with the idea of postponing our wedding (I asked my Maid/Matron of Honor to cancel my bridal shower) and after many tears & lots of pro and con lists we’ve decided that due to finances (had some major things come up that used up our wedding savings) we will be postponing our wedding from September 22, 2012 to (likely) June 15, 2013.
This will allow us to enjoy the summer as an engaged couple (we were engaged last summer BUT if he wasn’t working we were helping with his sisters wedding), we can pay off some debt, save for our wedding & not sacrifice things we truly wanted (cocktail hour, musicians, dream ceremony location, limo … to name a few).
We are going to go away on the weekend we were to get married to Niagara Falls to relax and be alone together so that we can reflect on our love and the future we’re building.
With more time means more time for DIY!! I am making a brooch bouquet for myself but didn’t have time to make crystal/pearl & brooch bouquets for my Maid/Matron of Honor & 3 BM’s so I’ll be able to do that now (likely … or if we decide on flowers for them I’ll provide the pearls/crystals & 1 special brooch per girl to the florist to add to the flowers). I wanted to make pommanders so I can do that now.
I’m excited in a way but sad in another way that we’re delaying our big day BUT I know all that matters is that we love each other and 1 day isn’t going to change that.
Post # 3
That is disappointing but i’m glad you are able to see the positive in it! We are also having a long engagement due to financial reasons. Best of luck to you both!
Post # 4
@hollyberry4 thanks! It IS hard BUT I know it’s worth it in the end. We’ve been engaged since April 2011 so when we get married we’ll have been engaged for a little over 2 years.
We have no financial help from our families (it kinda irks me that his family isn’t helping because last summer they spent $10,000 to pay for his sisters wedding, they footed the WHOLE bill and MrN & I went up 3 of 4 weekends a month from April – August to help prepare their home for the wedding (staining a 1200square foot deck hunter green takes 3 coats & it’s a LOT of area to stain!!) & we didn’t even get a thank you, not an offer of $ to cover our gas costs (it’s a 2.5 hour drive each way to get to their home), nothing so we’re kinda annoyed but letting it go for the sake of family.
Post # 5
Did you ask them about why they contributed to his sisters, but not yours? Not that you should expect something, but it’s always unfortunate when parents treat their children differently for whatever reason, including gender.
Take the time to bargain hunt, DIY, buy Michael’s out on 50% or 55% coupons (sneer at the 40% ones), etc.
And the Niagra Falls trip sounds beautiful!
Post # 6
Sounds very responsible and like you made a great decision for you two!
Post # 7
You won’t regret it. We changed our wedding date too, from Nov 11 to May 5 because we wanted to buy a house before the wedding and our finances were just stretched to thin. That extra 6 months of saving and planning time made such a huge difference. I think it was meant to be. I feel like we had the perfect wedding day. I am sure you will find the same to be true.
Post # 8
@kay01 we didn’t ask them because we know what they’ll tell us, that his sister couldn’t afford it becuase of school and they were helping out & ended up just paying for everything (we’ve heard them say that before, not to us directly).
They cancelled their trip this year because they are stretched so thin and it’s sad becuase his sister doesn’t appreciate what they did for her or how it’s made her brother somewhat resent her (he won’t admit it but I know he resents her because of it, he is the older child & has never been given anything, he has to work so hard for it all & yet his sister gets everything done for her or given to her).
Post # 9
I think that is very responsible of you two!
“We are going to go away on the weekend we were to get married to Niagara Falls to relax and be alone together so that we can reflect on our love and the future we’re building.”
We cancelled our wedding and we will be at our former wedding location the weekend of the former wedding as well!
Post # 10
@MrsN2Be: That’s really unfortunate. It sounds like the parents need to learn to set boundaries (or they will start to resent her too), but that’s their problem, not yours. Good for you for working with what you have and supporting Fiance so this resentment doesn’t permanently damage his relationship with his sister.