(Closed) Postponing Engagement

posted 6 years ago in Proposals
Post # 3
Member
418 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: March 2013

[comment moderated for personal attack]

Post # 4
Member
780 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

Maybe he is now thinking he won’t ever be able to please you ever. My Fiance proposed to me on the back of a U-haul truck when we were moving into our house. I had no makeup on and was sweaty. He didn’t have a ring, because he wanted me to pick it out.  I did and chose one I love that was under his budget. The ring is only a symbol, maybe it’s a good thing you aren’t engaged, I think you need to think a little harder about what is really  important. Sorry, but just being honest.

Post # 6
Member
5962 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: April 2018

YIKES!! This is just not a good place to be in at all, and I’m sorry that you are sooo upset with everything that has happened, but imagine how totally shitty Jay feels, you lit into him like no other because the ring was cheap and the proposal was lame?  Have you ever had to ask someone to commit their lives to you for the rest of eternity?  I’ll bet it’s freaking terrifying!  Mr. 99 popped the question in our doorway while I was holding a bag filled with ice cream, trying to get out of my boots and coat and evading our three huge dogs…no big romantic moment, no down on one knee….just a ring and “Can we do this now?”

You marry the man, not the ring, not the proposal…so he boned it….is he a great guy or what?  Do you love this guy or what?  He’s not some trick pony that has to leap through a dozen hoops in order to earn the privilige of your company for the rest of this life….I know you wanted something else, and you can feel hurt, it’s ok…what’s not ok is pointing that at this man your supposed to love so much….

Take some time, and apologize, because while the circumstances may not have been ideal, I would imagine you’ve hurt him terribly.

Post # 7
Member
780 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

@Nona99:  +1

@AJMrsF:  He may change his mind and you can’t blame him if he does. If you do get married, you freak out if everything doesn’t go the way you had planned it. That’s just life. We can’t all be  The Duchess of Cambridge Laughing

Post # 8
Member
342 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

My Fiance was engaged before, the girl kept making him take back the ring.  He broke the engagement off.

 

That being said, my Fiance proposed to me in a parking lot on leap day in the middle of the night when we were walking.  It was nice, just simple and nice.

 

I don’t know what you want, but I suppose if you aren’t ever going to be happy with the effort he did put in, might as well let it go.

Post # 10
Member
1460 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

I told my Fiance the other day that I was supposed to have some sort of elaborate proposal story.  We were talking and neither of us even remembers the actual proposal.  He thinks I asked him and I thought he asked me.  I didn’t even have a ring for a month or two afterward and even told him not to get me one.

Truthfully I don’t give a damn about the proposal or ring.  The important thing is that we’re getting married next month and I can’t wait.  🙂

Of course, he did have enough sense not to get down on his knee in public because he knows I would have punched him in his babymaker for such shenanigans.  Whether it was grandiose or lackluster I didn’t want to share that moment with anyone but him.

Post # 11
Member
780 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

@Hiya_Unicorn:  +1

The same thing happened to my Fiance and his ex

I was in a horrible abusive first marriage (thank God no Kids) and I am so happy to be with my Fiance who is the most wonderful man in the world, I didn’t care how he proposed, I was just glad he did

Post # 12
Member
1854 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

So, your boyfriend wanted your proposal to be perfect but was too nervous to go through with an elabroate plan so he proposed while you too were alone and wanted to buy you a placeholder ring until he could afford what ( I assume ) he knew you wanted.

 

I’m sorry the only problem i see is you not seeing how their is love coming from his actions. If you need a diamond in gold for your proposal to be real i don’t think you are emotionaly mature enough to get married.

I think some inner reflection on your part should be happening

Post # 13
Member
342 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

@AJMrsF:  Seems like you got it figured out, not sure what you need advice on.

Post # 15
Member
3572 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

YOU ARE NOT CRAZY.  you are worth far more than an airport kiosk ring.  I am sorry that is how he proposed to you.  I would have been devastated.  Yes you marry the man, not the ring, but you want a man who spends a little time & energy thinking about the ring in an effort to make you happy.

ETA: don’t know why these bees are being so nasty.  That’s been a theme on here lately, I guess.

Post # 16
Member
3357 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

@AJMrsF:  it isn’t the ring? then what does this sentence you posted mean?

“…but, at least to me, our love was a whole lot more precious than some quarter-machine-worthy-CZ.”

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