(Closed) Pre Emptive “no” shld I still send an invite?

posted 10 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
13 posts
  • Wedding: June 2008

I’d send it anyway just in case her schedule clears up.  We’re two weeks out (!!) and we’re still getting a lot of last minute, oh-now-I-can-comes.

Better to send it than risk hurting her feelings, I say.  You can always write her a separate note saying you know she said she wouldn’t be able to make it, but you wanted to make sure she got formally invited regardless.

Post # 4
378 posts
Helper bee

I had the same situation and I did not send an invite. Granted, it was to one of my bosses so it was kind of a gratuitous invite anyway, but we did not send one. But I agree with JuneBride, a note to go along with it would be nice.

Post # 6
344 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2008

I had a woman from work tell me the same thing, and said "don’t send us an invite, I know how much they cost". My initial reaction was "I don’t need RSVP’s yet!" I told my mom about it, and she said that maybe she didn’t want me to send an invite, because she thinks that an invite = a present. I wouldn’t want her to think this, but oh well, I’m still going to send an invitation!

Post # 7
184 posts
Blushing bee

I’ve had several people with pre-emptive "nos" and I only sent one of them out (sorta by accident).  I have a very tight guest list as well and if they send a gift, I will definitely send a thank you card.

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