(Closed) Pre-Marital Counseling

posted 9 years ago in Beehive
  • poll: Are you and your fiance doing pre-marital counseling?
    Yes...been there, done that : (15 votes)
    24 %
    Yes...doing it now : (12 votes)
    19 %
    Yes...going to do it : (19 votes)
    31 %
    Hadn't thought about it : (2 votes)
    3 %
    Nope : (11 votes)
    18 %
    Other : (3 votes)
    5 %
  • Post # 3
    Member
    6009 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: May 2009

    I chose yes, but we’re Catholic so it’s kinda required.    That being said, we actually really liked our Pre-Cana classes.  With all the wedding stress and regular life stuff getting in the way, it was nice to have one night a week where we could just concentrate on ourselves and our relationship.

    Post # 5
    Member
    2433 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: June 2009

    We actually would like to take the pre-marital counseling classes/mentoring programs that we’ve heard about at other churches. My church used to require it, but after recent budget concerns, they cut the pre-marital counseling all together :-(.

    I was actually wondering – would it be odd to call other surrounding churches, explain the situation, and as if we could join in on their classes?  I just feel like that is a better option than skipping the classes altogether!

    Post # 7
    Member
    297 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: August 2008

    We also took a marital prep course at our church where there were other engaged couples, but all discussions brought on by book or video were discussed between the couple. It was kind of neat!

    Post # 8
    Member
    291 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: August 2009

    I agree with LittleBear, MissEdamame! We’ve only recently started going to the church we’re taking our premarital classes at, and we’re not getting married anywhere near the area…I just liked the type of premarital counseling they were offering and decided to go for it, even though I felt kind of weird initially since we really didn’t know anyone.

    So for us, we just started classes earlier this week and they’ll run for about 6-7 sessions I believe. I like the format — everyone is broken into smaller groups of 3 couples with one married couple coaching. Each week discusses a different topic, both in the large and small group setting. Fiance is still not quite sold since he doesn’t really believe that he’ll learn anything he didn’t already know before the class, but even if that were the case, I like that it’s encouraging dialogue between us (even if he doesn’t quite realize it ;)).

    Post # 9
    Member
    773 posts
    Busy bee

    Our pastor automatically does it with every couple she marries.  It was a great experience!

    Post # 10
    Member
    97 posts
    Worker bee
    • Wedding: April 2009

    We went to premarital counseling, but through a therapist, not a church. I would highly recommend it. There’s a preconception that counseling is only for couples in trouble, but it can help anyone communicate with their partner better. Now I’m starting to sound like a therapist–that’s what I get for marrying one!

    Post # 11
    Member
    275 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: May 2009

    We did the weekend retreat thing and it was great!  I highly recommend it!

    Post # 12
    Member
    321 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: June 2009

    We are doing it as well, though we are "distance" learning so to speak. That is he is in Kuwait and I in Oregon. Believe it or not it was mostly his urging. My pastor is helping from my end and he’s getting some additional assistance from friend with who he went to Seminary. However, I think when we start to co-habit we’ll do formal counseling at our Church, as it just seems like a little more can’t hurt.

    Post # 13
    Member
    436 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: September 2010 - Casa Real at Ruby Hill Winery

    I voted "other" because we’re not particularly religious but I kind of want to do it. Seems like a good step to take before marriage!

    Post # 14
    Member
    578 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: December 1969

    I really want to go through premarital counseling. I think it would be a really positive thing. Wish we would start it now. Is there a set time when you should start it?

    Post # 15
    Member
    232 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: June 2009

    we too are having a catholic wedding, and we too agree that our pre cana was fantastic.  both of us agree that our relationship improved after the pre cana classes.  i know it seems weird, but we actually are at the best point in our relationship because we  took that ‘required’ class.

    Post # 16
    Member
    754 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: May 2008

    While we did not seek premarital counseling, I think it is a good idea for certain couples, especially couples who are really young, haven’t lived together, or those uncertain where they stand on issues such as religion or children (just to list a few examples). 

    One really intersting thing we learned was people who have any sort of pre-marital counseling have a 9 out of 10 chance of not divorcing! I had no idea!

    I am not sure who told you that information, but there is no way that is a correct statement. 

     

    The topic ‘Pre-Marital Counseling’ is closed to new replies.

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