(Closed) Pre-nup question for all you lawyers/law students

posted 7 years ago in Legal
Post # 3
Member
2208 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

I’m not familiar with Canadian law, but here in California in the US, judges do not look favorably upon pre-nups where only one party was represented by an attorney. You can at least tell your FI that you need your own lawyer if the brother will represent his interests.

The complication with a pre-nup is that you can only sign away so much support, and you can’t sign-away any future children’s rights. They can be rather complicated, and you guys are very good candidates for a pre-nup, with the business.

I would therefore highly recommend that you both have your own attornies. There is no need for it to be adversarial, and you never need to see the brother, if that is who your FI wants. My advice would honestly be to hire a family law attorney of your own who you feel will protect your interests, and rely on him or her. Don’t worry about the brother, with someone looking out for your interests, he won’t be able to pull off much.

Post # 4
Member
435 posts
Helper bee

Why does he insist his brother write it?  I think I might be a little concerned about that.  I guess you will be fine if you have an attorney, but it just sounds a little shady to me.

Post # 6
Member
435 posts
Helper bee

I’m sure it’s fine, but hope you are very careful. Good luck!

Post # 7
Member
5494 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: August 2011

I agree 100% with Monitjb.  In the US the law states that each party to a prenup MUST be represented by their own, independent attorney.  So the brother cannot represent both of you.  I second the advise she gave you on getting your own attorney and not worrying about the brother.

Post # 8
Member
435 posts
Helper bee

Oh, I didn’t mean it was ok that only the brother would be representing both of them.  I just meant that her husband was not intending to do anything wrong by using his brother.  I am in no way an attorney or anything close to it.  Sorry if I misled.  I just thought it was strange at first that he only wanted his brother to write it up.

Post # 9
Member
570 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

If I were you I would get myself my own lawyer that way there is one for each party, just to make sure all the paperwork is legit and nothing is missed.

Post # 10
Member
860 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

I cannot stress to you how important it is for you to have an attorney.  Please, please, please consult an attorney.  Like another poster said, it doesn’t necessarily have to be adversarial, and you don’t have to directly talk with the brother if you have a lawyer.

Your FI has substantial assets.  You want someone looking out for your rights and protecting you too, and you want that person to be well-versed in all the legal mumbo jumbo. 

Post # 11
Member
403 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

“My advice would honestly be to hire a family law attorney of your own who you feel will protect your interests, and rely on him or her. Don’t worry about the brother, with someone looking out for your interests, he won’t be able to pull off much.”

I completely agree with monitajb.

Post # 12
Member
1675 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

In Canada you need to seek Independent Legal Advice (ILA) before you are allowed to sign a prenup to ensure that you understand the content of the document and aren’t being forced to sign under duress. The lawyer you see will not be able to be associated with your FI’s brother as it could constitute a conflict of interest. The lawyer you see will have your interests in mind and ensure that you aren’t being swindled in any way.

I’m in Canada too and all of this information came from The Guy who is a lawyer.

Post # 13
Member
900 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

Additional question:  I’m in a very similar situation (no brother-lawyer though).  About how much time will we actually have to spend with the lawyers and then what’s an estimated cost?  

Miss Jay – I think your situation is a little tricky, just because lawyer-time is so expensive!  If you have your own lawyer, the brother shouldn’t be able to screw you over in any way.

Post # 14
Member
1675 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

@sarahsd – Your best bet is probably to call a couple firms in your area and ask them to give you a ball park. However, it will mostly come down to how much back and forth you have between your lawyer and your FI’s (hopefully not much if he’s being fair), as obviously lawyers’ fees come down to the amount of time they spend on any particular file.

Post # 15
Member
2208 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

@ sarahsd: if you walk in very prepared (financial and corporate documents in hand), you probably will not have to spend a lot of time with the lawyers. Know before hand what you think you want, tell them what you’re not sure about, and express what your values are in this area (preservation of the business, fair support, etc.). You can probably really keep your costs down by just doing your homework and being prepared.

I couldn’t say how much you should expect to pay, but feel free to call around. In addition, ask friends and family if they have had good experiences with family lawyers and wealthy planning attornies.

Post # 16
Member
1641 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

I’m concerned that you are calling the man you want to marry “cheap”- not frugal, or resourceful, or any positive description, but a very negative one.

Are you sure you want to marry him?

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