(Closed) Pregnant…and strongly considering divorce (long, sorry)

posted 4 years ago in Emotional
Post # 31
Member
310 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: December 2014

It does sound like he is selfish.  I know I’ve heard the first year of marriage can be the hardest, throw in a new teenager living with you and a new town and job sounds REALLY hard.  I would give it some more time and push for counseling before you make up your mind for a divorce.

However, if it doesn’t work out I’d just move back to your hometown to raise the baby to be around your family and friends.  Could you get your old job back?  

Post # 33
Member
11650 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2015

lmnop1984:  if he is a Christian and doesn’t believe in divorce or therapy, will he see your pastor with you? 

I would definitely explain to him (and he must know some of this, he obviously had a relationship long enough to have a daughter who is now a teenager) that not believing in divorce isn’t the end game, it’s only the first step. 

What he’s doing is like a doctor saying to a bleeding patient I don’t believe in amputation. Well, that’s a great start, but please address the bleeding. 

Post # 34
Member
7683 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

lmnop1984:  And on top of all of those changes, your body is going through hormonal and physical changes!  Yikes!  No wonder you feel the way you do.  I hope that Brielle’s suggestions help you.  Hugs

Post # 35
Member
1649 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

My first year of marriage was horrrriiibble. We were long distance first too, then I moved to a new city to be with him, new job, few friends, etc.

 

I went into counseling because my husband insisted the problems were all on my side. Counseling really helped me, and my husband – on his own – decided to read some books and get some on-the-job training that actually changed him as a person. We’re now going into year 3 of marriage and we’re happier than ever. I’d try counseling for yourself and see how it goes from there

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