(Closed) Pregnant lady rant. Guh.

posted 5 years ago in Pregnancy
Post # 2
Member
4509 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

You think he could’ve offered to at least get the door. I went to pick up a light, but big package the other day, and our apartment manager gave me a dolly to borrow – and I’m not pregnant.

Post # 3
Member
9544 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2013

Ugh! I’ll give him the benefit of the doubt and hope he’s just dumb, because the other option is asshole! But that’s awesome that you got your carseat! What kind di you get? We’ve been looking and it’s totally overwhelming!

Post # 5
Member
1310 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2015

Is there a reason you didn’t ask for help?

Post # 6
Member
602 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

Is it possible he didn’t want to assume you’re pregnant?  Most men I know will never, ever assume pregnancy unless they know for certain that she is.  Even if it’s super obvious, they will still err on not totally offending someone for appearing pregnant but not actually being pregnant.

That being said, though, it’s just basic decency to help someone out, regardless of pregnancy status.  So he still should have helped. 

Post # 7
Member
1649 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

Sorry to hear he was so dense! I would just straight up and ask him to help next time!

Post # 9
Member
555 posts
Busy bee

Wow, that is pretty rude. I don’t know what to tell you but some men are just stupid. We once talked in a college course about how men are not being polite anymore, for example offering a subway seat to a pregnant woman. So we asked some of the guys in the class and one guy responded that he also wouldn’t offer the seat because “it’s not my fault she is pregnant/I didnt impregnant her”. That statement started a small war;) Men can be assholes. I would honestly say sth to that guy the next time you see him lol. 

Post # 10
Member
1557 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

GooteyBootey:  I know how you feel. I’m 34 weeks right now and things are getting pretty difficult to pick up.

Granted, through most of my pregnancy, I scoffed at the people who would see me picking things up and tell me to put them down, I’m pregnant! I kept having to tell people, “Thank you for your concern, but I’m perfectly fine with this load. If I need help, I will ask for it.” Now that I do need help, I’m constantly asking my husband to move and pick up things for me, but for a while, he’d get me griping at him for making me feel weak and precious.

Perhaps this guy has had experience with a pregnant lady like me and didn’t want to get his head chewed off by a hormonal, defensive pregnant lady? 

Post # 11
Member
1952 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

Men are such idiots some times!!! Im guessing he is young and/or does not have any children of his own? My Darling Husband probably would have never helped a pregnant woman before me becoming pregnant. He just didn’t realize all the stuff involved with pregnancy!

Post # 12
Member
47187 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

I think men sometimes feel like they can’t win these days.

If they offer to help, they are often rebuffed by women who assert their ability to do anything on their own. If they don’t offer to help, they are criticized for that.

I think the solution is more direct communication on women’s part. If you want help, you ask for it. If you don’t want to ask for help, and the package is too big, you ask if you can leave it in the office.

Post # 13
Member
8833 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper

GooteyBootey:  “Knowing this is pretty much my only chance to get it” — Your only chance ever? Why? If you’re 34 weeks, there’s plenty of time for your husband to find an opportunity to go get it.

Post # 14
Member
955 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

If you needed help, you should have asked for help. 

Post # 15
Member
2878 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2015

GooteyBootey: there may be policies where he can’t help with packages (insurance, workers’ comp issues) or he may have a back problem or he may be a dick. 

You didn’t ask so there’s no way to know. 

I’m sorry you’re pregnant and can’t lift packages you’ve ordered easily. 

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