Post # 1
I’ve been pretty independent during my pregnancy. I don’t mind bending over too much, and carrying things haven’t been an issue, within reason. I just don’t have the mentality of pregnancy hindering me daily. Though, I certainly wouldn’t say no to since occasional spoiling ;). That being said, brushing happened this morning that sort of left me questioning my mentality, and keep in mind this is a rant, nothing more.
I received a notice on my apartment door last night saying a package was waiting for me in the main office. Knowing my husband would be home too late to get it for me, and just being curious as to what it was, I walked down to the office this morning. It’s not a terribly long walk but it does involve quite a few stairs and several doors.
I get to the office and the manager is at his desk just doing paperwork. I wave to him and he points out the package. My eyes grow wide with fear. It’s our carseat. DH’s aunt bought it off the registry and kindly had it shipped to us. The problem? The box is huge, heavy, and I’m 34 weeks pregnant with asthma. And let’s face it, upper arm strength has never been my strong suit. Darling Husband affectionately calls me “noodle arms”.
Knowing this is pretty much my only chance to get it, I pick it up. I’m struggling, bumping into walls and door frames. I make eye contact with the manager. The still not on the phone or othewise occupied manager. The 6’7″ works out every other day manger. What does he do?
He literally just watches as I try to figure out how I’m going to open any doors with this box that is bigger than me in my arms. He. Watched.
I eventually did get down the sidewalk and up the flight of stairs into my apartment, but not without needing my rescue inhaler immediately afterwards. It took me a good 15 mins for the wheezing to stop.
So that’s my rant. Very happy we are moving out and I won’t have to deal with an apartment manager for a very long time.
Post # 2
You think he could’ve offered to at least get the door. I went to pick up a light, but big package the other day, and our apartment manager gave me a dolly to borrow – and I’m not pregnant.
Post # 3
Ugh! I’ll give him the benefit of the doubt and hope he’s just dumb, because the other option is asshole! But that’s awesome that you got your carseat! What kind di you get? We’ve been looking and it’s totally overwhelming!
Post # 4
JenGirl: Haha yes, I guess maybe he’s just dense? We got the Graco click base one. We have two cars so we figured one that can easily be swapped from one to the other would be best. It really is overwhelming though!
Post # 5
Is there a reason you didn’t ask for help?
Post # 6
Is it possible he didn’t want to assume you’re pregnant? Most men I know will never, ever assume pregnancy unless they know for certain that she is. Even if it’s super obvious, they will still err on not totally offending someone for appearing pregnant but not actually being pregnant.
That being said, though, it’s just basic decency to help someone out, regardless of pregnancy status. So he still should have helped.
Post # 7
Sorry to hear he was so dense! I would just straight up and ask him to help next time!
Post # 8
Arae83: He actually knows I’m pregnant. Darling Husband and I have had to talk to him about moving out and what breaking our lease entails. We had the convo about 3 days ago, but otherwise that would be a very real option.
Kaymar: Pride, maybe? I don’t know, that’s why it’s a rant and not a legit complaint. 🙂
Post # 9
Wow, that is pretty rude. I don’t know what to tell you but some men are just stupid. We once talked in a college course about how men are not being polite anymore, for example offering a subway seat to a pregnant woman. So we asked some of the guys in the class and one guy responded that he also wouldn’t offer the seat because “it’s not my fault she is pregnant/I didnt impregnant her”. That statement started a small war;) Men can be assholes. I would honestly say sth to that guy the next time you see him lol.
Post # 10
GooteyBootey: I know how you feel. I’m 34 weeks right now and things are getting pretty difficult to pick up.
Granted, through most of my pregnancy, I scoffed at the people who would see me picking things up and tell me to put them down, I’m pregnant! I kept having to tell people, “Thank you for your concern, but I’m perfectly fine with this load. If I need help, I will ask for it.” Now that I do need help, I’m constantly asking my husband to move and pick up things for me, but for a while, he’d get me griping at him for making me feel weak and precious.
Perhaps this guy has had experience with a pregnant lady like me and didn’t want to get his head chewed off by a hormonal, defensive pregnant lady?
Post # 11
Men are such idiots some times!!! Im guessing he is young and/or does not have any children of his own? My Darling Husband probably would have never helped a pregnant woman before me becoming pregnant. He just didn’t realize all the stuff involved with pregnancy!
Post # 12
I think men sometimes feel like they can’t win these days.
If they offer to help, they are often rebuffed by women who assert their ability to do anything on their own. If they don’t offer to help, they are criticized for that.
I think the solution is more direct communication on women’s part. If you want help, you ask for it. If you don’t want to ask for help, and the package is too big, you ask if you can leave it in the office.
Post # 13
GooteyBootey: “Knowing this is pretty much my only chance to get it” — Your only chance ever? Why? If you’re 34 weeks, there’s plenty of time for your husband to find an opportunity to go get it.
Post # 14
If you needed help, you should have asked for help.
Post # 15
GooteyBootey: there may be policies where he can’t help with packages (insurance, workers’ comp issues) or he may have a back problem or he may be a dick.
You didn’t ask so there’s no way to know.
I’m sorry you’re pregnant and can’t lift packages you’ve ordered easily.