Pregnant MOH

posted 2 years ago in Bridesmaids
  • poll: Who’s being selfish?
    Bride : (164 votes)
    96 %
    MOH : (6 votes)
    4 %
  • Post # 16
    Member
    472 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: March 2017

    Wow this is the most ridiculous thing I’ve ever heard of. It’s one thing to tell your friend once she’s pregnant “hey let’s talk shower dates so ours don’t overlap because I would love to go to yours and have you be at mine”…..it’s an entirely different situation when you want your friend to plan starting a family around your wedding.

    why on earth do you think your wedding is so important that your poor Maid/Matron of Honor needs to change her timing of TTC? You’re not the first to get married and certainly will not be the last. 

    Im also amazed that some people have voted “not selfish”. This is the definition of selfish. 

    Post # 17
    Member
    850 posts
    Busy bee

    I have no words, other than I hope the Maid/Matron of Honor gives birth to a beautiful, healthy baby on your wedding day. 

    Post # 18
    Member
    4126 posts
    Honey bee

    hmoore :  “Before you go judging me…IM NOT BEING A BRIDEZILLA!”

    Post # 19
    Member
    1126 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: September 2018

    You want someone else to not exist yet so that your pictures aren’t “ruined” by having real people in them. Yes, that is selfish af. 

    Get with her and plan shower dates. 

    No one is obligated to put their life on hold to cater to your wedding. 

    Post # 20
    Member
    4957 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: October 2017

    My aunt had a baby shower for my cousin two days after our wedding.

    It didn’t phase me, everyone had a blast at the wedding, then we saw each other a few days later and celebrated the new baby.

    You’re being ridiculous.

    Post # 21
    Member
    6004 posts
    Bee Keeper

    Ignore these Bees that say you’re being ridiculous love-  umm, hel-LO?!?! This is your wedding year! And she’s not just in your wedding party, she’s your cousin too- so major thunder stealing going on here. She’s obviously super jeal of you and is so obv trying to steal the spotlight. I suggest you call a bridesmaid meeting asap (so she won’t feel singled out and cause more drama and also in case any other wedding party members get any bright ideas).

    At this meeting, make it fun and bubbly with Girls Night Out wine and balloons in your wedding colours and little bite sized but elegant treats, then when everyone’s relaxed and you’ve set the tone for it being all about you, lay out the ground rules for being in your wedding party. First and foremost is no unprotected sex, duh, they can wait to be preggers ffs. Then you can let them know your specifics for your destination bachelorette, showers, lingerie parties and any other festivities you’ve envisioned. This would also be a good time to assign DIY projects. Lastly you can give them an overview of rules (no-one cuts their hair without your approval!) and an itinerary of meetings, appointments, and general expectations. 

    You’re welcome laughing

    Post # 22
    Member
    1154 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: January 2021 - City, State

    RobbieAndJuliahaha :  😂, worryingly the OP might believe you and do exactly this, it would be hysterical 😀

    Post # 24
    Member
    4286 posts
    Honey bee

    Shouting you aren’t something doesn’t make it true.  In fact it smacks of protesting too much.

    You get a life.  She gets a life.  Neither of you gets to tell the other how to live it.  Neither of you get to expect the other to put their life on hold.

     Happiness isn’t pie.  There is an infinite amount to go around.  It’s not like once the happiness pie is all served and the pie plate is empty, no one can be happy about anything else.  So yeah, wanting people to put their lives on hold because you want to have all the attention and happiness from everyone is incredibly self-absorbed and selfish.  I’m really not sure how you could have come to any other conclusion and have to ask.

    Post # 25
    Member
    7411 posts
    Busy Beekeeper
    • Wedding: October 2014

    “I feel that my wedding with be underdog to her baby.”

     

    Here’s the thing.  Your wedding is the #1 event for you and hopefully your fi. For everyone else, it’s the underdog to something. Everyone has something they’re more interested in or excited about than your wedding. Maybe it’s a new baby. Maybe it’s a promotion, vacation, new car, or just an exceptionally suspenseful season finale of The Walking Dead. But it’s more important to someone than your wedding is, and that’s ok, because people all have different priorities. you need to accept that your wedding isn’t as  amazing for everyone else as it is for you.  Embracing this simple truth will make wedding planning much easier.

    Post # 26
    Member
    758 posts
    Busy bee

    You’re being completely selfish and unreasonable.

    You have zero right to tell someone that their baby is inconvenient to you. You are being a total bridezilla. If my best friend asked me to stop TTC because I might steal her thunder, we wouldn’t be friends anymore.

    Post # 27
    Member
    4233 posts
    Honey bee

    100% bridezilla. Sorry. You can’t expect someone to plan their life around your party.

    Post # 28
    Member
    392 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: February 2017

    My best friend and Maid/Matron of Honor was super pregnant at the time of my wedding; actually she was on bed rest the day of my engagement and still help my now Darling Husband areange everything, she did flowers from her bed amd made sure everything eas beautiful for us! 

    I picked the day of my wedding based on her due date, knowing she would be 8 months pregnant and hoping my lovely niece would not come earlier. She looked beautiful, was huge, but danced all night long. She wqs with me all the way through planning, she planned my bridal shower, I planned her baby shower. We were both in a special place of our lives and I believe it was amazing how much we share the joy of each other.

    just look at this picture, is my Darling Husband signing papers at the church, but in the back yo can see the love between me and my best friend

     

     

    She went to my hair trail, dress fitting, everything!! I had a backup friend know that if she had to get bed rest I would love for her to step in, but at the end everything worked out great and mos importantly you could feel the love, and when you are sharing the most important day of your life with someone, thats what you want to feel from your “rocks”

    Post # 29
    Member
    342 posts
    Helper bee

    You know most people don’t concieve in the first month, so it may very well she doesn’t get pregnant for another 2 months anyway. And also what if her and her husband have trouble concieving? Better they learn sooner rather than later. Imagine if they had waited the 2 months like you asked only to find out later that they have fertility issues and could have done something about it sooner, that fuels resentment right there.

    And I’m sorry to break it to you, but yes, a new baby(especially a first grandchild) is going to trump over your wedding planning. A new life being brought into this world is infinitly more exciting than a party. That doesn’t mean people won’t come or that people won’t enjoy your wedding on the day, you are entitled to having that one day to be the star of the show, but the world doesn’t revolve around you. 

    Post # 30
    Member
    6166 posts
    Bee Keeper

    Girl, you have absolutely, positively, 1000% entered bridezilla territory. How would you feel if she asked you to change your wedding date because she was pregnant and your wedding might take away from her nine months of making a human? After all, you’re just planning a party. 

    Assuming OP is one of the Maid/Matron of Honor votes who the hell is the other one? Craziness. 

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