(Closed) Premarital Counseling

posted 6 years ago in Relationships
Post # 3
Member
2419 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2015

I think if you are having a pastor/priest marry you, it is required to have premartial counseling. I’m planning on doing it once we get engaged as well.

Post # 4
Member
663 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2017 - Vegas Wedings

Here! He’s supposed to call his insurance company today and get some names/ offices we can go to. I think its great and most of my friends have done it.

Post # 5
Member
3772 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

I think its a good idea. I think it ensures that you’ve talked about everything you need to talk about BEFORE you get married. That way down the road you don’t have an issue pop up that you never thought about! We did it, (because it was mando with the church) but I liked it because it did bring up a few things, plus we did it with an older couple at our church and it gave us advice on how to communicate and what issues are worth fighting over and which ones are better to just let go. I also learned that the way I word things can go a long way.. 

Post # 6
Member
556 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

I did. We did it with our pastor. It was not something I wanted or thought I needed. Darling Husband and I were not working through any difficult times so I did not understand why we would do it. But let me tell you! It was the absolute best thing we could have ever done. I highly recommend it.

Post # 7
Member
873 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

We did a little bit just after we were married – didn’t have time before.  Honestly, it was useless.  The chaplain wanted to talk about who was going to do household work and fidelity expectations during deployments and such.  It was not relevant to us and our issues.  I’d highly suggest you really focus on premarital counseling that relates to you and your situation, not just something that a counselor doesn’t for every coupe.

Post # 8
Member
3968 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

Are either of you students? Sometimes counsleing centers at universities can be helpful.

Post # 9
Hostess
16213 posts
Honey Beekeeper

We did premarital counseling with our pastor and found it to be really valuable. It was very low pressure, largely just making sure we had talked about everything we needed to talk about before getting married. Finances, family, communication styles, our faith, and how we saw all of that factoring into our marriage throughout the years. I’d recommend it. 🙂

Post # 10
Member
663 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2017 - Vegas Wedings

@starrynight:  Yeah, Ive been to a couple over the years for personal reasons and you really need to make sure you are going to one who understands you and your issues. Plus, like any profession, some are better at their job than others.

Post # 11
Member
853 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: December 2012

In Texas the state waves (I think) $60 of the fee for a marriage license if you complete premarital counseling.  Most county websites give information on which churches and organizations offer approved courses.

Fiance and I started it but about a fourth of the way through discovered that the minister had decided to test a new curriculum on us that was about 5x longer than the standard counseling courses.  So technically we are premarital counseling drop outs after six weeks of learning nothing new about each other, but we are not the norm because we have been friends since we were eleven.

Definitely look into which different programs are available in your area and what are the different focuses (I am a firm believer that financial management should be a priority) and time– know up front what the time requirements are.  Do some research before deciding on who and don’t just take the first one you find that looks okay.

 

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