(Closed) Preprinted thank yous 12 weeks after wedding??!!!

posted 6 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 17
Member
307 posts
Helper bee

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WhatMaeBee:  I think hand written thank yous are antiquated.

Some of us still try to show people we care about them by doing more than clicking a “thumbs-up”.

Post # 18
Member
1702 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2015

We received a photo postcard instead of a thank you note for a gift we sent for a friend’s wedding.  I have to say, I thought it was rude.  I believe the bride and groom should have at least signed it.  I was always taught to write personalized thank-you notes when I received a gift, especially when it is a special occasion and I did not have the chance to thank the person personally.  It has been 2 months since my wedding, and we only have 1 note left to send (gift was from a relative’s guest, and the relative has been in the hospital and unable to help us find her address.)  I think it is best to send notes as soon as possible, and personalize them at least somehow.  If you are designing a photo card, tell the designer to leave space for you to sign and maybe write a quick message… it doesnt require that much room, and makes a big difference to the person who gave the gift.  

Post # 19
Member
1202 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2015

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WhatMaeBee:  I think hand written thank yous are antiquated. 

If sincere and heartfelt displays of gratitude are wrong, I don’t want to be right.

Post # 20
Member
275 posts
Helper bee

Sorry, no offense, but no one cares how great your professionally photographed thank you picture is. They care about the personal message you are giving them to thank them for their presence and thoughtful gift.

Post # 21
Member
499 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

 

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MsYankee:  My friend did the SAME thing!! I was one of her bridesmaids too. Hers was a pre-printed postcard. UGH I was SO flippin annoyed. She had about 250 people there too. Just because you have a big wedding doesn’t mean you get to skimp on thank yous. Part of the package.

Post # 22
Member
1811 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

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BeachBee1988:  
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PandaBurr:  genuine question then, if you have custom made Thank Yous that are full photos, would you actually write over the photo? I feel like that’s ruining something so perfect. 

Post # 23
Member
1113 posts
Bumble bee

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WhatMaeBee:  I’d rather have a hand written thank you note than a professional photo of you and your husband.  Don’t you think it’s a little self absorbed to assume guests will appreciate your “gorgeous” portraits with pre printed thank you’s? 

Don’t get me wrong, I think photo cards are cute (mostly with babies and dogs), but I think what you just wrote out is the epitome of “me me me” after you get all the “me” for your wedding day as it is, and assume all your guests want is more of you after they have spent time and money to attend.  

Post # 24
Member
1113 posts
Bumble bee

Like seriously though, do the math.  I get that writing cards sucks.  I do.  I do it now.  But if you think of writing at least 5 cards a day, you could EASILY get all your thank you’s out in a month or two tops depending how huge your wedding is.  Everyone has time to write thank you’s.  

It doesn’t have to be cutesy matching stationary either.  Thanking your guests is more important.  I bought small thank you cards from target and tried to write cards as gifts came in so I wouldn’t get behind.  If relatives sent gifts twice (sent one thing then added on a few weeks later), they would often get two cards thanking them.  It doesn’t have to be long.  

Post # 25
Member
1811 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

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doglover89:  in all the weddings I’ve ever been to as an adult, not one has done hand written thank you cards. DH and I don’t care either way, we know our presence and our generous gifts are appreciated no matter what. Our “self absorbed” thank you cards ended up having like 20 people reach out to us to say how amazing they were. Different strokes. 

Post # 26
Member
2792 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2015

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WhatMaeBee:  What the hell are your guests going to do with a “perfect” full photo of you and your husband? It’s going in the trash, along with the rest of the thank you notes. If you want to give people who actually care to keep a picture of you two (your parents, grandparents, etc.) then just give them that picture. 

Post # 27
Member
3841 posts
Honey bee

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doglover89:  In the US, bridal showers and baby showers are literally all about the gifts, so not opening them in front of the guests is actually rude. I also think when there is a young child involved, like a 1 year old’s birthday party, gifts from guests should be opened. I did not have any kind of showers, because I felt uncomfortable opening presents in front of people, but if you’re having that type of event here it is expected.

Post # 28
Member
1811 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

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carolinabelle:  they were actually folded cards, so whatever you normally do with a card. My thank toys were the same in format to all the other thank yous we’ve ever received-everyone we know sends folded thank you cards that are from the photog and are pics from the wedding day. All thank you notes go in the trash, so that’s eventually what happens anyway… Somebody peed in your Cheerios, happy gal. 

  • This reply was modified 6 years ago by WhatMaeBee.
Post # 29
Member
2792 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2015

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WhatMaeBee:  That’s kind of the point…if it’s going in the trash, why make your guests wait six months for a thank you? And then not actually thank them for the gift they got for you? 

Post # 30
Member
192 posts
Blushing bee

I would be mad that it wasn’t handwritten or personal in any way. 

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