(Closed) "Presenting" baby's name on bridal shower invite/etc?

posted 3 years ago in Pregnancy
Post # 3
693 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

I think it’s fine, especially if people want to give engraved or monogrammed gifts. Although I will say that it’s a good thing I have a unisex name because even the doctor told my mom I was going to be a boy!


Post # 4
9557 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2013

Eh, I think you’re probably right that you’ll stick with your name, but she is right that people do crazy things at births. Seriously. I work in a lab that gets samples from newborns and I’ve seen three different names for the same kid. Or kids that turned out to be the opposite gender (though usually the other direction). Weird things happen.

The nice thing is that it doesn’t really matter! There’s certainly no requirement for the baby name to be on a shower invite so let them design them however they would like, with or without the name (I’ve actually never seen a baby name on a shower invite, even when parents were sure of the name). And while it’s annoying that your MIL isn’t convinced with the name, it really isn’t that big of a deal. So just smile to her face and roll your eyes when she turns away (figuratively speaking!).

Great name, by the way!

Post # 5
4042 posts
Honey bee

BellaDee:  Quick question, did you mean baby shower in your title instead of bridal shower? Just curious because if you meant bridal shower…then I think this situation would be a little different/strange. 

If you are talking about baby shower, then my thoughts are to leave the name off the invite. If you really want to “present” the name, why not reveal it at the shower? Then if by some chance you do change the name, it’s not like it’s written all over everything. I haven’t had a child, but I have had many friends change the baby’s name at the last minute. Heck, I was supposed to be Ashley and my dad literally changed my name (on the birth certificate) after my mother fell asleep and then submitted it. My mother was not happy at first…but it worked out in the end. 

Post # 7
1941 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

The babies name I love starts with an H and his last name will also be an H… so I figure going with an H monogram will work regardless… Other than that, I would probably stay away. Just in case.

Post # 8
1728 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: March 1998

I get the impression that your in-laws might be passive-aggressively trying to get you to consider other names with their comments. While I’ve certainly heard the “you could change your mind!” route, rarely is it so heavily pushed. Given that “Luca” is a less conventional name, I’m guessing that’s why you’re running into so much beef.

I probably wouldn’t have my baby’s name on anything shower-related because there is a slight chance I could change my mind (though, like you, I’m pretty firmly decided) and I don’t like the idea of being locked in or explaining things later. That, and if unconventional names aren’t the norm for boys in your social circle, it means explaining your decision and how you came up with the name and blahblahblah to family members and friends you may not even really care about. I feel like incorporating the name into the big day can, on the plus side, help everyone feel a little more bonded to the baby — on the downside, like it’s open season for criticism.

If they keep making their “for now,” comments, it’s time for someone to say, “Luca for sure,” every time until it drives home the point. If they make comments about changing your mind later on, a curt, “I heard that happened to you, but it’s not for us,” can get the point across. This is better, of course, if it comes from your husband if he’s dealing with his family.

Post # 10
964 posts
Busy bee

I don’t see a problem with it, however I wouldn’t do it. I have seen people steal other’s baby names before birth before so I wouldn’t chance it. Plus, I’ve read that gender mistakes STILL happen with all the technology these days.

Post # 11
8889 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper

I don’t see a problem with it.  Our daughter’s name wasn’t on the invites but the cake said Quinn 🙂

Post # 12
1789 posts
Buzzing bee

I am not saying you will change your name choice, but I would probably not put something on the invite just incase. My sister told everyone through the entire pregnancy that her babies name was Paul and we embroidered all the blankets with it, painted it on the nursery wall etc… Her babies name was Augustus. No one has any idea where it came from, I still call the kid Paul but whatever, stranger things have happened when giving birth. 

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