(Closed) Pretty sure my mom doesn't like my dress

posted 6 years ago in Dress
Post # 3
Member
3569 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

first off love your dress. Your mom needs to remember it’s your wedding your dress. She doesn’t need to like it, she needs to shut up and smile and be happy for you.

Post # 4
Member
234 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

That dress is soooo beautiful! To be honest, go for the dress YOU love, not your mom. My mom also envisioned another dress than the dress I bought in the end. She saw me in a special dress and both, my sister and my mom, told me how beautiful that dress is! Well, it was, but sure not for me! In the end, my mom didn’t see the dress in real until my wedding day. But then she had to admit that my dress IS indeed so much more beautiful than the other one. Your mom will be taken away by you as bride, believe me! And she will LOVE you in the dress you love. At the end it is your and your husbands special day.

Post # 5
Member
136 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: March 2013

@Swizzle:  I know how that feels. When I went dress shopping, the nicest thing my mother said is that I had back fat. I knew from the second I got engaged that my mother wouldn’t like anything I picked because she thinks that I’m hideous because I’m overweight. There would be no pleasing her no matter what dress I chose, unless I lost a billion kilos.

People always say just to ignore it etc, but I know that isn’t always so easy. But if you love it, there is really no point changing your dress if your mum is generally negative about everything – she’s going to dislike it no mater what you do. My plan is just to keep her out of it, and not ask her opinion. 

I hope it works out for you!

Post # 6
Member
8359 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

I guess it depends on your relationship with your mother. If my mother said it wasn’t the dress for me I would probably keep on looking because I trust her opinion and know she wouldn’t BS me or tell me what I want to hear just because I want to hear it.

Post # 8
Member
2 posts
Wannabee
  • Wedding: October 2012

Hey! I have the same one and when I went my mom was picking destination style dresses with cut outs when I wanted lace. I went back the next week and bought this one and invited her to the very first fitting. Just the two of us. I put on the veil and jewellery etc and she started tearing up.

My mom and i have had our ups and downs over the last year with my wedding and boy does she drive me crazy sometimes but in the end she’s your mom and loves you and once she sees how much you love the dress it won’t matter.

I’m biased, but it’s such a classic dress that how could she not like it?

I HATE the grossgrain belt, I don’t think it goes with the dress at all but that’s just me. Maybe adding a beaded belt will modernize it and win her over?

Post # 9
Member
2523 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: December 2012

While I don’t like that particular color of the belt, the dress as a whole is beautiful. I think when she sees you walking down the aisle, she’ll be too overwhelmed with emotion to really give a damn about the disagreement of the dress.

Get the dress that makes you feel beautiful!

Post # 10
Member
240 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

Your dress is so classic and gorgeous! 

I had the same experience as you did.  I went bridal shopping without my mum for the first few times, then when I had narrowed my top choice down she came with me.  Big mistake.  The woman hated every inch of it, circled me like a disgruntled shark, and picked on every detail that she didn’t like for a good hour. 

Her negativity really hurt my feelings.  Despite the fact that people say that you should do what makes you happy cause she’s not the one wearing it etc. it hurts to not have the support of your mother! 

So what did I do?  I went and got the damned dress that I liked.  Was I worried that it was hideous and that I was insane for purchasing it?  Yes!  Ultimately, did I do the right thing?  Yes!!!!!!!  

Let’s face it, you only get married once.  You do NOT want to get married in a dress that makes you miserable, and you do NOT want to look back and feel sad that your mother took your right to choose your own wedding dress away from you!!! 

Note:  the thing that made me feel really sane in this whole ordeal was posting on the wedding bee board.  I never disclosed how much my mother made me feel miserable about my dress.  However, I did post a pic of me in the dress, and I knew straight away when i started getting all of this supportive feedback that the dress was the right one and that my mother was just being difficult. 

Post # 11
Member
53 posts
Worker bee

Your dress is lovely! My mom did not like my dress either, but I loved it! I am so happy that I went with the dress that I chose and not my mother’s choice. Sometimes moms don’t always know best! 

Post # 12
Member
1269 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

My mom wasn’t even there when I chose. She loves what I told, but I’m struggling with dress regret. 

Post # 13
Member
206 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

Love your dress! So classic and elegant! I know it’s easy to say “it’s your day, not your moms” but the truth of the matter is, you DO want your mom deep down to love it. So I definitely understand why that could be upsetting to you. However, when your mom sees you on that day, about to marry the man of your dreams, anything you wear will be beautiful in her eyes! If she constantly brings it up, just reiterate that you absolutely love it and can’t wait to marry your man in it, and just smile. This will make her see that you are very happy with your decision and her motherly instincts should kick in and she’ll be happy for you 🙂 
 

Post # 14
Member
505 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: March 2013

@Swizzle:  seriously?? Your dress is beyoooond beautiful!! It’s AMAZING! The details on the lace are stunning and the quality of pronovias is great! I wonder what she doesnt likes about it? Maybe that SHE would never wear something like that but remember its about YOU, not anybody else.. I had dress regret with mine and even tried to change it because my mom and Mother-In-Law didn’t liked it, until I tried it on again, I remembered why I chose it EVEN when they didn’t.. The dress is aall ME (:

Good luck! 

Post # 15
Member
200 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: March 2013

My friend found THE dress when she and I went together. Then when she took her mom the second time her mom trashed all over it. My friend ended up giving up on her big wedding plans and had a planned elopment. 

Don’t let your mother drag on your special day. You may regret it later.

Post # 16
Member
1081 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: December 2010

Your dress is stunning!

Ignore your mother, I’m sure you look just beautiful in your dress!

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