(Closed) pretty sure that this is MY baby…

posted 9 years ago in Babies
Post # 17
Member
5976 posts
Bee Keeper

The next time she brings it up, just shut her down immediately. Tell her, “Mom, we’ve talked about this already. I know your opinion on the matter, and it’s no longer up for discussion.”

Post # 18
Member
1641 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

This is way several people I know have refused to share the baby’s name until he/she was born.

Post # 20
Member
5110 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: November 2011

the only think you can do is put your foot down and keep it firmly planted. If she doesnt like it oh well.. Its not her choice or anyone elses besides you and your husband. Im sorry your so frustrated. It will pass…

Post # 21
Member
1160 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

@ForeverYoung: Hmm. We may have the same mom. “I’m doing what I WANT no matter what you say (but of course I’m gonna tell you all about it)”? Check. The berating when you make a different choice or do things differently? Check. Bringing up petty grievances YEARS later? Check.  I hear ya, I know it is so annoying to know WHY she’s calling Annabelle Anna, but if I know that in my life I want any peace I just have to disengage from her. “K mom, sounds cool.” “Sure mom, I’ll do that” (and just do whatever it was I was going to do anyway) *smile and nod* etc. With my mom, she just likes the battle. If I refuse to fight with her on something that isn’t any of her business, she will usually drop it after awhile cause she realizes how dumb it is.

Post # 22
Member
3461 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

@Zinzerena: Haha.  My sister named her son, born in July, Noel.  (Pronounced like Nol, not No-ell.)  I was only told about this in advance of the decision with the promise of making no comments about the names they were considering.  I got to nod and smile only.  All of her friends were mostly stuck on trying to figure out how to pronounce it.

Post # 23
Member
6040 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: October 2019 - City, State

@ForeverYoung: I would honestly just not talk about it with her anymore and do what one pp suggested, just tell her you are keeping your options open and will announce the name when the baby is born. I really dont think it matters if she’s calling your baby anna because she just likes the name more of if its because its a good shortened nickname. The names are so similar and anna is technically a nickname for the baby name you chose. I think you are over thinking this part of it. If you are ok with others calling her anna it should be ok for your mom to do it as well.

also I do think its was in poor taste for her to say something like the name is stupid. that is rude and can be hurtful. Even if that is what she thinks she should not have said that to you.

Post # 25
Member
654 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

We’re currently going through this with a good portion of my husband’s family. We named our daughter Libby-Jane after his grandmother and mine. Several people in his family are insisting on calling her just Libby. It’s not that I mind that they’re shortening it but its apparent that they’re intentionally leaving my grandmother’s name out to make it more about their family. These are the same people that tried to get us to use Jane as her middle name instead of having it be part of her first name. My only advice is to just continue to tell your mother its not up for negotiation and you don’t want to discuss it. Once she is here you can either choose to just let it go and let your mom call her Anna or correct her every time. I personally am the type of person that has to get my point across so every time someone says “so how’s Libby?” I say “the baby is great, but did you forget that her name is Libby-Jane, not just Libby? or Libby-Jane is great, thanks for asking” with the emphasis on Jane. Sometimes I feel like a broken record but eventually they’ll get the point I assume. I’ve also told some of them “her nickname is Laney (a combination of both names) so if you don’t want to call her Libby-Jane please call her Laney as opposed to just Libby” Sorry this was a bit of rambling, I just wanted you to know you’re definately not alone.

Post # 26
Member
567 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2010 - MacLean Park

You wanna know the best part here? You have the ultimate bargaining chip, your baby. If your mom keeps overstepping once your child is out, kindly inform her that if she can’t comply to your wishes in raising your child, she will have limited visits, and never keep her alone. Obviously it’s not something to do lightly, since keeping baby and grandma apart is really not a great thing. But if she starts trying to override your decisions, take away the mothering of your child, and just butting in to an uncomfortable degree… limit your contact! I’ve already had to warn my mother, and my Mother-In-Law. They say dumb crap about “Well, that’s a dumb idea. At GRANDMA’S house, we will do things differently!” Upon which I respond, “Well, guess she ain’t making it over to grandma’s all to often then, huh?” And they relent. You (and your husband) get to decide how to raise your child, not anybody else. So tell your mom, thanks but no thanks, her name is Annabelle. And if she throws a hissy fit, she will just have to learn the hard way, won’t she?!

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