(Closed) Printing Thank you Notes

posted 6 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
Member
201 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

Handwritten – like you suggested, printed is too much like an impersonal email. The photo is a great touch (I’m sure people will love it!) but that doesn’t get you out of getting carpal tunnel while writing 100 thank you notes Smile

Post # 4
Member
1699 posts
Bumble bee

Let me introduce you to an important rule for a happy marriage — based on my non-existant experience with marriage. YOU take care of your share of the chores YOUR way, and thank your lucky stars and your darling husband that he takes care of his share of the chores AT ALL.

I may not have been married, but I kept house for my Dad until he died. The compromises required to live happily day-to-day with a parent aren’t all that different. Etiquette is founded on a lovely double standard. It sets the highest standards for you to apply to yourself; and includes among them a high standard of tolerance, understanding and foregiveness that your are expected to apply to everyone else.

In short: don’t even dream of trying to “make” your new husband hand-write those thank-you notes. Sure, I would never type or print-out a note. And thank you for holding back the dark night of decadance by handwriting your own notes! But technology keeps on changing and the same social adaptations that made it acceptable for me to use a ballpoint pen for thankyou notes (instead of a fountain pen) will someday make it acceptable for your hubby to print out thank-you notes (or even — shock! — email them!!!) instead of hand-writing them. Until then, think of him as an early-adopter, as a leader of social reform — and hold your tongue.

Post # 5
Member
1917 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: April 2012

I am writing all of the thank you notes for our wedding.

Post # 6
Member
1375 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

Think about it this way: People went to the expense of travel and purchasing gifts for you.  A handwritten thank you note is appropriate, and likely expected.  I’m pretty sure Great Aunt Tilly will not be pleased if she receives a printed note, and won’t stay quiet about it either.

Post # 7
Member
196 posts
Blushing bee

I think I’m going to be hand writing mine, but people beg me to type my letters to them.  (It feels like a waste of a pretty card to me if I don’t write anything on it!)  My handwritting is almost completely illegible, so I’m left with the choice of a printed letter that people can read or a handwritten one they cannot.  

For me personally, as the potential recipient of a thank you, as long as the letter isn’t generic and is hand signed, I don’t care if it’s hand written, computer printed, typed on a typewritter, or made from cut and pasted letters from magazines.

Post # 8
Member
1699 posts
Bumble bee

@Jinxstar:  Actually, cut and pasted from magazines might be a bit creepy 😀

Post # 9
Member
196 posts
Blushing bee

@aspasia475:  Well, unless it was from my niece, I would probably wonder a little.  😀

Post # 10
Member
1699 posts
Bumble bee

@futuremrsfitz18:  As long as it is his Great-Aunt Tilly, and as long as she sharpens her tongue on him, then that is just fine.

If Great-Aunt Tilly tries to make the case that it is women’s work to write the thank-you notes, then kanadiea can send her to me and I will remind her how we marched together for equal rights back in the seventies.

If hubby-to-be comes here himself and asks, I’ll back your argument to the hilt. Until then, though, Aunt Tilly is our best hope for civilization as far as he is concerned. It is not the wife’s job to rear husband politely.

Post # 12
Member
556 posts
Busy bee

@kanadia82:  handwritten….because even if it’s personal typed, id assume the author did a lot of cut and pasting and reused some statements.

and i know in handwritten a lot of the sentences are the same, but it just feels more special when it’s handwritten.
 

Post # 13
Member
674 posts
Busy bee

Is there any chance he wants to do it because his handwriting is tough to read or he has trouble with legible handwriting?

I know it sounds silly, but my other half is in IT and always typiing.  He pretty much only signs his name.  He can write in print reasonably well, but his cursive is horrible.  He was joking around recently that he wasn’t sure if he even could handwrite a note in cursive anymore.  His little “test” for himself took him much longer than I would have expected and was damn near impossible to read.  In that regard, I can see him wanting him to type notes instead of write them.

Post # 14
Member
196 posts
Blushing bee

@LibertyBelle:  This is exactly my problem.  I got Cs in grade school in handwriting.  I’m a programmer.  I take notes in meetings by typing.  I type my grocery list.  I can hand print if I need to do it, which is what I’ve been doing on cards, but no one, including me, can read my writing.  I’d be tempted to hire a calligrapher for my thank yous if it was in the budget.

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